New member...heroin withdrawal

[mybelle123]

Hi. I'm new here and I wanted to post something because I'm looking for some support. I've been reading other people's posts on here for a few months now and have been trying to get clean by taking the advice I've found on here, but I can't seem to get past two days without relapsing. So I thought I'd start my own post and talk with whoever is willing to listen and maybe that will give me what I need to get through this. I appreciate any advice anyone has for me.

I recently started using again after being clean for 5 years. I started dating a guy who was fresh out of rehab and he relapsed a couple times and I thought I could be there for him and help him but eventually I started using again with him. I broke up with him soon after and have been trying to get clean ever since. Its just so hard to get through the withdrawals. I have a young son and I'm trying to tell myself that I can do this for him because he doesn't deserve this. Despite getting addicted to heroin again I've still managed to take care of my son and hide my addiction from everyone in my life. I have no support system. If I were to tell any of my family they would just judge me and I would get yelled at and put under a microscope. I've wanted to tell someone for so long but I just can't. So I thought this forum was my best option.

I did my last shot about 3 hours ago and I have a pretty small habit because I've been slowly decreasing the amount I've been using to make this whole process easier. I've been using less than a half g a day and I only use one time a day. It takes me about 20 hours to start feeling sick. I have one subutex that I'm planning on taking a small piece of once I start feeling sick. I want to take it to get me through withdrawals and then get off of it as quick as possible. I know that once I get through the first couple days I will be okay, I just need some support to make it that far. Even with the subutex I always feel crappy still and don't get any sleep, but I'm just going to fight through it. I have to do this. I'm just so tired of living this life and having to hide it from my family. I want so badly to be clean. If anyone has any advice for me I'm open to suggestions. Thanks so much for taking the time to read this.

 

[phactor]

What do you plan on doing once you are off completely (including after the Sub)? Getting clean is much easier then staying clean (at first at least, then staying clean becomes so so much easier then using its unreal). Of course this is just my experience.

Your motivation seems good but what I found is that ultimately I had to be honest with others if I wanted to get honest with myself. The best way to make things up to your family and loved ones is by getting and staying clean.

 

[wezface]

Sounds like you pretty much know what you're getting into, but I just wanted to say that I am here if you need to talk and this is a great place to get support. Keep up the good work and know that the longer you let it go on, the more of a chance that it will take over your life.

 

[Lovecraft]

Hi. I'm new here and I wanted to post something because I'm looking for some support. I've been reading other people's posts on here for a few months now and have been trying to get clean by taking the advice I've found on here, but I can't seem to get past two days without relapsing. So I thought I'd start my own post and talk with whoever is willing to listen and maybe that will give me what I need to get through this. I appreciate any advice anyone has for me.

I recently started using again after being clean for 5 years. I started dating a guy who was fresh out of rehab and he relapsed a couple times and I thought I could be there for him and help him but eventually I started using again with him. I broke up with him soon after and have been trying to get clean ever since. Its just so hard to get through the withdrawals. I have a young son and I'm trying to tell myself that I can do this for him because he doesn't deserve this. Despite getting addicted to heroin again I've still managed to take care of my son and hide my addiction from everyone in my life. I have no support system. If I were to tell any of my family they would just judge me and I would get yelled at and put under a microscope. I've wanted to tell someone for so long but I just can't. So I thought this forum was my best option.

I did my last shot about 3 hours ago and I have a pretty small habit because I've been slowly decreasing the amount I've been using to make this whole process easier. I've been using less than a half g a day and I only use one time a day. It takes me about 20 hours to start feeling sick. I have one subutex that I'm planning on taking a small piece of once I start feeling sick. I want to take it to get me through withdrawals and then get off of it as quick as possible. I know that once I get through the first couple days I will be okay, I just need some support to make it that far. Even with the subutex I always feel crappy still and don't get any sleep, but I'm just going to fight through it. I have to do this. I'm just so tired of living this life and having to hide it from my family. I want so badly to be clean. If anyone has any advice for me I'm open to suggestions. Thanks so much for taking the time to read this.

I'm sorry you're going through this. I recently went through something similar after having almost 6 years. My wife and I also have a baby son. But you seem like you're all alone. So I can't imagine how you could cold turkey a habit and raise your child at the same time. Maybe you can but I know I couldn't. If you could taper off the subtext that would be great. It would work but you have to stick with your plan, which is difficult to do. But it can work, you just can't take more than you should if you feel bad.

You can do this, you just have to fight. Once you're clean again, then you can think about maintaining it. But now you just gotta get through feeling crappy for a while. But it'll pass.