• NMI Moderators: M!$TER-ED

New member, have been reading for years though!

AnythingEverything

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 17, 2014
Messages
540
Hi all

I'm a new member but have been a member of many other forums and have often searched this site over the years for info and opinions on different subjects.

36 year old married mother of 5 and business owner and long time addict. Back in the day it was amphetamines, weed, alcohol and party drugs. Quit to have kids but continued with other damaging addictions. About three years ago I very quickly formed a raging benzo and oxy habit and added a lot of alcohol to the mix also. Dabbled once again with my drug of choice, heroin and came very close to going back down that track. Nearly lost everything important to me, ended up in detox, have done rehab and had 3 or 4 psych wards last year.

Anyway, now still slowly reducing the benzos and on 28Mg of suboxone and a few psych drugs and also dealing with a long term eating disorder. Feeling like my life is on hold on this damn suboxone (dr wants to increase to 32mg!!?) while I'm still seeking out decent therapy to deal with my 'issues' once and for all. I live in a tiny town of 400, 3-4 hours away from the Aussie city I love and therefore any decent mental health/drug services.

I decided to join tonight when I was searching for info on online pharmacies, but I'm not asking any questions here as I was really looking for experiences, definitely not trying to source and I wouldn't want to get into trouble!

Looking forward to being involved in the forums :)
 
Last edited:
Anything everything welcome, my d.o.c. is also heroin . But I'd sure as hell go up if that's the only thing available. I've been on subs for 4 years but tapering and planning to stop. They can be good if you're hard core like us to take the chaos out of our lives. They can be the space between insanity or the end of insanity it's up to us. You're correct in assuming any questions about online meds. Is a no no and the moderators will catch it. I glad you decided to join us please keep us posted, we know how it is so keep on keeping on.

D.T.B.T.
 
Thanks for the welcome.

Can I ask at what pace you are tapering and from what dose? I want to do it really slowly when I'm ready (which is not yet) but I worry about being in constant withdrawals for a long time and sometimes think id be better off doing it fast to get it over with but I've heard that the pain and effects go on for a lot longer than with opiates? I'm scared about it tbh but I am trying not to worry yet as that time has not come.
 
The clinic I went to will dose as high as 24 mgs. I chose to go as high as 16 mgs. I was comfortable enough at that dose. After a few years I didn't like the way it made me feel. I dropped 2 mgs. Every 10 days. I didn't notice much at all in fact at 4 mg. I started to feel better , more like my old self. From 4 I did 1 mg. In 10 days went to 3 , 10 more days to 2 mg. 2 mg. is the hardest part of the taper. Im going down .25 every 10 days. Im at 1.5 mg. at this time. Most of the time I recommend people do a quick Dr approved 30 -45 day taper and not stay on it for years. In my case I needed the time to get different parts of my life together and to get some distance from my D.O.C. What I can say is I didn't feel like I was in constant withdrawal. Get your other issues squared away first. When it's time to taper down, you'll know it.

DTBT.
 
Thanks for the info. Yeah, I was not one who could use bupe for the fast withdrawal from opiates. I have too much deep baggage stowed away that I am acutely aware of everyday with little time and few resources (living miles from the city in a 400 person one horse town.). I do need to get my shit sorted before I start to taper. I believe my dose is too high as it's stealing my soul. I do often use 32mg or more a day so am often left with only a few mg on the last couple of days of the week and I DO feel much better on the lower mgs but only for one day because after that the tolerance catches up with me.

Thanks again :)
 
My understanding of how bupe works, there's not a whole lot of difference between 16 mg. and 32 mg. Your receiptors will only utilize a certain amount so 32 is not really double 16. I'm sure someone will come along that will explain that much better than I did. I always felt 16 mgs. was a good maintenance dose for me and I did that for 3 years+. In time I quit obsessing over heroin and other like substances. Keep in touch and let us know how you're doing.

DTBT
 
Yeah I do understand all that. Still the addict brain says more is better full stop. While logically I know it's not true, I'm easily convinced. At my last few appointments (I only have to go once every three months) I've told myself I want to tell him I want to get down to even 24 to start with and then when I'm in there I never do. Then I say well I'll do it myself at home, haaaa. Never works.

Thanks, I will keep in touch, I enjoy forums:)
 
Rapid bupe detox isn't for everyone. I know I benefited from maintenance. I can fully relate to what you're going through right now. I'm pulling for you. In the meantime it's just a mean time.

DTBT
 
Hey there :). Seems like we have some things in common then.

I've been tapering for over a year but have been literally crippled by anxiety this week so I left a message with my sub dr (the only
One in the state able to prescribe me anything) this arvo asking to increase my sunoxone and get a short xourse of Xanax. My
Tolerance is still really high, I've taken my whole weeks worth a few times which is way less than I was previously on and it does nothing (Valium.)

Nice to meet you :)
 
Just joined also.... Same age almost same situation only I never tried h. Pretty dumb since I've been taking subs for 8 yrs now
but I know me and how addictided I get that's why I have never tried it once! Currently on benzo's and oxy and suboxone.
I've been looking for online sites also but no luck.... As far as suboxone is concerned it works wonders and does its job. Don't be afraid to up your dose untill your comfortable take your time tapering off.. I did it at my own pace and was very close to being off untill I had a major injury and needed meds again... Good luck fill me in on anything....anything lol.
 
It seems to me like most people actually WANT to taper off the subs, but I don't really understand why this is the case. Does it effect you negatively in some way? I'm under the impression that it works to take away symptoms of withdrawal, so why be in any hurry to get off the medicine?
 
Top