I always wanted to believe in spiritual things. Qi gong helped me to see that energy was real. I took only a few lessons, but I was amazed to find that I could feel energy in my hands as I meditated. After my first or second lesson I also realized that, afterward I could see smoky energy around the room. So, I could see and feel energy now (previously I thought such things were abstract notions, things I was Supose to believe in but not see.. :/ )
There was still something that kept me lacking in true belief though. I could not fully leave the logical mindset, yet logic and science could not convince me that all of our spiritual beliefs as a society held weight. Examples of heaven and reincarnation, things that sound good, but what is there around me that shows me that these things could be real? Essentially I was plagued by a disassociation most people today, especially western people, are caught in. There is the need for logical evidence today, yet there are so many contradictions in spiritualism. For one, there are so many different belief systems, and so many opinions over what they mean to individuals. Another thing, religious ppl see signs every day, or at least claim to. Yet, I haven't so much as seen a ghosts. I wanted to see something supernatural to believe, yet there was nothing.
I started to meditate. At first I did qi gong, then I researched other energy meditations online. I started to strengthen my chakras. I realized that I could move energy in and out with my breath easily in time. My third eye chakra was particularly easy to feel. I felt a distinct pressure there. ( I will talk more on my meditation techniques after I finish with my point)
So I was meditating, it was good, it helped my mindset allot. I cleansed and empowered myself so my mind was less clouded. At this point I got links on the Internet from friends that started me in on New Age beliefs. Before this, I had felt that my quest to find true spiritualism had to be one from within. I did not really trust other people's belief systems because they to often contradicted one another.
So, to where I am now; I started listening, and feeling, and thanks to all of the New Age links I was receiving, I began to realize that, not only I, but the universe around me was "on the right track". I started listening to shorts on YouTube of Terrence McKenna, other spiritually scientific ppl, I watched the spirit science shorts. (
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDMzvJOu9vQ )
I researched a bit of the sources listed on Spirit Science. There was lots of criticism and possibly contradictive material. It didn't matter to me, this link helped me to realize an important truth. I realized that our understanding, scientifically, of spirituality is similar to our scientific knowledge of other things before science was well structured, as it is today, upon other certain beliefs. What I mean is, we are beginning to explore the spirit and find new laws through trial and error. Allot of what ppl have to say on the science of spirit is similar to allot of what people had to say about nature pre-Darwin... It is imaginative and bringing about of deeper concepts within reality, yet, I believe now we are on the cusp of new and powerful developments that will revamp the way we percieve existence.
So, what I mean by saying, "that my mind is opening up to deeper truths around me." I don't picture my self as a Buda or anything. I am far from enlightened. Yet I know now I, and we, are on the right track. I can not say exactly how I know, as it is not fully proved to me, yet I can finally feel again, that I am able to believe in God as I did when I was a child and did not have to question that universal consciousness was real. It occurs to me, the patterns we find in nature, on a small scale as well as a larger scale give us a message. River systems, resemble roots of plants, resemble blood vessels. Models of galaxy clusters, resemble, neurons, resemble cities at night. Solar systems resemble atoms. Suns collect from the nebula of other suns, and go on to produce the matter necessary for a solar system.
The universe is absolutely alive, and we are but a little/big part of it's consciousness. Aliens beings are more numerous than the stars and they riffle our sky. Intelligent life must surely travel from one star to another with ships based upon their own mental constructs residing in higher realms of demential existence than the one we can perceive with our basic senses alone.
I believe this is the point I have to make. Set aside logic for a second, just long enough to turn inward, you will realize that we have found so much, yet there is so very much we are lacking in our understanding of the world around us. Yet, we circle the truths that elude us every day. To the atheist and the dogmatist alike, this might sound like assumption based on wobbly ground.
yet, the biggest realization I think I have come to thus far is that, although it may seem like western civilization has left the spiritual in pursuit of science, to many, we have not escaped the spiritual, the natural things. If you look around you with the proper mindset, you can learn to discern the ritual, the magic, the nature in what we do as a society. (the key is to give in to it
)The only danger I see with this realization is that, if we continue to remain blind to the magical power within us, we might just use our nature to overpower the nature of our world, thus setting it off balance and sacking the Eco environment around us. All of this is already understood by me and many other people. The difference in my perception is subtle. I have difficulty putting it into a logical story. But the important point, I believe, for me and any others who seek the light of spiritual understanding, is to share what ever it is they can and to pull together to reshape our world and restore the light to our little corner of the universe before it is burned out..
My meditation technique cont. later
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