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NEVER PLANNED ON RELAPSE AFTER 15+years sober

repsaj

Greenlighter
Joined
Mar 1, 2018
Messages
3
So after being sober for 15 years from morphine and heroin iv addiction I relapsed.
2years ago. The day I was burying my father a ?friend ? placed 10-norcos in my jacket pocket. Of course I took them and that began a new morning noon and night ritual. I then turned to dalauted andmorphine a year in. I have gotten myself a really good habit going with about 5-6 4mg delaudid per day or 2-3 100 mg morphine a day. I recently told my wife after she asked what was up with me for a few weeks I finally caved in after I came home to a drug test. I lit that thing up all across the spectrum. I?ve now been on suboxone for three days and am jonesing pretty hard. The suboxone is helping but still having w/d?s. I need helllllp.
 
Welcome to Bluelight :)

I'm sorry to hear about the relapse and your lose. Both can be really tough things to deal with. If you're looking for support while getting straightened back out, check out Sober Living and The Dark Side. Those two spots have some really great people and will offer as much support as possible.

Have you thought about getting treatment, like going to an in-patient rehab? Or possibly seeking counseling? While the suboxone may be taking care of the physical side of it, the mental side of things can be the real mofo to deal with. Addressing that is key when trying to get back to a sober life. My suggestion is to try and stay distracted as much as possible. Do some physical activity that'll tire both your mind and body. Staying active is key in really sobriety.

I hope you get through this ok. You've already proven to yourself that you can stay sober for an extended period of time so don't beat yourself up over this slip up. It's done and over with. It's time to move forward and do right.
 
Hey swerlz thanks for taking time to respond to my post. To answer your question yes. I?ve soi to a few counseling offices and I think I found a pretty good match got an appointment Monday at 1:30 talked to him over phone and he seemed very kind and knowledgeable. As for inpatient rehab. I?m not a big fan of the way that system works. But that will have to be a whole new thread. As for the withdrawals I tried using kratom with suboxone. And it helped a lot. Any experience with this?
 
hello,
I am sorry to see you having problems after such a long time. It is great that your on you way to being sober.Use the sub as a tool and keep the doseage at the least possible ( surprising how far 2 mg will go if you wait and time it right)TO AVOID GETTING DEPENDANT ON THE SUB.
Be very carefull and taper ASAP..its no easy task but its so worth it..
kratom is your friend here and use it in place of the sub as much as possible

the trick here is to be free of the sub and the opiates not switching one poison for another.
 
So after a few days on suboxone I tapered off. Stayed sober for a solid 7days then banged some meth and when I got home there was another piss test waiting on me. I told my wife I messed up. She made me leave this time. I?m sleeping at my shop on an adult pallet I made out of cardboard and shipping blankets. I?m trying to find a rehab that actually has some great counselors with real life experience and great teaching skills to help me learn to cope without drugs. Fuuuck I?m in Oklahoma if anyone knows a grey place.
 
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