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Need advice on the intro of E to my boyfriend and some unintended consequences...

E

Earswithfeet

Greenlighter
Joined
Nov 25, 2011
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16
So here is my little story...my boyfriend and I have been dating for five months and I introduced him to Molly a couple of months ago. He was completely new to trying anything besides alcohol and I believed that the experience would open him up and make him more empathetic. My own ecstasy experiences over the last ten months have been incredibly positive and have lead to fear reduction, better communication skills, more empathy for others. Because of my job and also due to my desire not to "lose the magic" I now limit my rolls to maybe once every few months, if that. My goal was to help my boyfriend let go of some fears, open the way for more communication and show him that his perceived ideas about MDMA and drugs in general was misinformed. He is very new to lots of things, electronic dance music, the dance scene, among some of them. The first time I got him high he was so nervous about the experience and unable to let go that he fought the trip almost the entire way through despite my attempts to help him relax. By the end of the night he was feeling a lot less nervous and able to enjoy things. The second time around followed the same pattern except he was able to let go earlier in the night and we enjoyed time at home alone together. His complaint was that he needed more to sort of force him to submit to the effects of the drug..he has admitted to having control issues. The third time was about a month ago with the help of some friends we had him rolling his tits off...well..he bumped into people, danced like crazy (yay) but had very little self control during the most intense part of his high...he just didn't know what to do with himself.
Now he would like to experience this again and I am unsure of what to do. He has talked about wanting to do molly again...and even made mention of conversations he's had with people about it at work. (this REALLY worries me) I want him to feel freer...but his version of free is almost bordering on reckless -- which is not what i intended at all.

So far things have not turned out in the way i had hoped...he prefers E just to be high, has not had any personal insights and seems to only be able to go out and dance when high or after having drinks....as someone who loves to dance and feels music often on its own is its own high this has caught me off guard.

He is now interested in trying weed, and wants to do E again. I know he is experimenting with something new to him but should I be worried at all about his behavior?:? He has had very few experiences with Molly and I wonder if with time he will come to desire it less (as I did) or if things will snowball down a different road. I need some constructive advice on my worries..are they completely unfounded? I know i opened the door to pandora's box..now i just need advice on how to navigate the things flying out of it, HEEELPP!
 
Yea u opened pandoras box. Before I had tried e I had done almost every other drug known to man but never really gave it much thought. The first time I did e it was so magical it has basically consumed my life in the aspect of always thinking bout it always trying to find the best stuff Shit even spending thousands of dollars to take a vacation to the e capital of the usa Chicago lol. And if I hadn't found my connect for some of the best stuff on earth id be in the Netherlands right now. Its not so much of wanting to do it everyday cause I dont I only do it bout once a month or longer but I'm constantly thinking bout it learning bout it educating myself bout it to the point where me and my gf started having relationship issues and I had to tone it down a notch. Ecstasy is such a magical drug that I could talk bout it for months and never say the same thing twice and I have met a lot of great new people who share my interest in it also which helps. As far as ur bf being reckless in public just try to use it more in a controlled environment until he learns. How to act while on it. Maybe just take it at a house party a couple more times till he gets used to it. Idk all I know is I'm 100% sure my gf wishes she never introduced me to it but she opened the box and now has to deal w the consequences hehe
 
Id like to know how you helped him let go to feel it. Ive never really felt E for more than 20 minutes. I believe i fight it too. :|
 
Same thing happened to me except with a friend. He had never experienced any intoxicant besides alcohol, I gave him a few hits of clean L a few months ago and he LOVED it. Now he wants to do it every weekend. He even started ordering morning glory seeds online. He is going to his first rave rave next week and i dont know if i should give him any MD. I know if i dont he will just try and find it himself. Maybe its better to just give him something that i know is clean.
 
He sounds like he's very much into control.
You should be careful, he could freak out if he really let go.
Is he just too young to appreciate E?
Or is that he doesn't appreciate you?
 
Not every drug has to be a self help prescription. MDMA is just fun. I 100% believe it helped me grow to the person I am today but some people just wana get fucked, much like myself these days.
 
Strutter you bring up a very valid point. There is not a damn thing wrong with fun - i've had tons of it on E. I am realizing that I put expectations on the experience that I shouldn't have. Much my own control issues at work. So it seems he and i both have a lot to learn. Thanks for the posts so far guys, keep em coming!
 
not to scare u but this really could send him down a wrong road to destruction in terms of experimenting with all sorts of drugs now. A similar thing happened to me back in 1999. i had never touched a single drug until that summer when i was 19. my best friend introduced me to E and it opened up a whole different world to me. i enjoyed it so much that i figured why not try other drugs and see if i feel as "magical " as i did on E. in just a few short months i had experimented with everything under the sun and then came the heroin. to make a long story short, not even 4 months after trying E for the first time, i overdosed on heroin and was basically dead until the paramedics shot some narcan in my system to revive me. my curiousity to new drugs almost killed me and u really shouldnt take this subject to lightly because god for bid something happens to ur boyfriend like me
 
When people try to play psychiatrist/pharmacist with someone they are emotianally attaced to, its essentially playing russian roulette with the relationship...

You wanted him to take it to fix his problems with little regard to the possible result... you said yourself that you had a problem with things "snowballing"... yet you still thought it was a good idea?
 
EDUCATE EDUCATE EDUCATE! Try to influence him to understand the means of responsible recreational drug use. Learn the drug: smell, taste, look, doses, side-affects, moderation - you get the idea! Perhaps introduce him to the Bluelight community and the concept of responsible, informed drug use, maybe he'll understand it, maybe not. I tried to tell my mother because she asked about me and i'm just far too honest to lie to her. I then explained my views and it still scares her and she doesn't understand it at all but this is my decision.

Personally, i've always wondered whether I would introduce a partner to MDMA. Deep down I know they need to make their own, informed decision to be truly ready for it, just like I did. However, my genuine obsession and love for the drug leads me to believe I would most definitely influence her. I find myself talking about it any given opportunity I can which i do often regret i'll admit! haha. I'd also never lie to a partner so if they asked about drugs i'd say my honest opinions and what I do. If this triggered a partner to try it with me and they ended up sometime down the line having problems, I would probably feel awful. While you're still together you can attempt to monitor what he does as weird as that sounds. For example, ensuring that the MDMA you both take is good quality, doses are correct amounts and moderation between rolls are respected.

I'll-informed, naiive drug-taking based upon peer pressure is very dangerous and we don't need another story and statistic for the Government's to pounce upon.

Hope this helped somewhat - Be Safe.
 
Many people have this "honeymoon" phase after their first time on MDMA, where they want to do it really often. I think it's normal to be really enthousiastic about something like this when you just discovered it, but in my experience this diminishes over time. Reading between the lines I think you experienced this yourself as well!

I don't know how much time is in between these instances, but if it's been a month or longer I wouldn't worry. If it's shorter you should probably make sure he knows about the health risks and the loss off "magic" following from too frequent use. In my experience most people will listen to that, especially as you are the "experienced user".

I wouldn't worry too much about the fact that XTC is not the same experience for him as for you. As long as he enjoys it! I also don't really get any personal insights on XTC, which I think is just something that differs from person to person. I certainly don't feel like I'm missing out because of that.

Finally I think it's really sweet that you care so much about your boyfriend's well-being. However I think as long as he keeps at least a month, or ideally 6 weeks in between his XTC moments you don't have to worry so much.
 
Last edited:
crobarkid99 said:
not to scare u but this really could send him down a wrong road to destruction in terms of experimenting with all sorts of drugs now. A similar thing happened to me back in 1999. i had never touched a single drug until that summer when i was 19. my best friend introduced me to E and it opened up a whole different world to me. i enjoyed it so much that i figured why not try other drugs and see if i feel as "magical " as i did on E. in just a few short months i had experimented with everything under the sun and then came the heroin. to make a long story short, not even 4 months after trying E for the first time, i overdosed on heroin and was basically dead until the paramedics shot some narcan in my system to revive me. my curiousity to new drugs almost killed me and u really shouldnt take this subject to lightly because god for bid something happens to ur boyfriend like me
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Your story is a good warning for others, but keep in mind most people do not have this reaction to their first XTC experience. Making the choice to experiment with heroin and many other drugs is not a logical consequence of XTC use. Of course it is still important to realize that some people can have this reaction.
 
Doing E does not mean you will do heroin. I will never touch crack or needles, and I've done MDMA, mephedrone, ketamine, cocaine, N02, acid, etc etc.
 
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