Titus
Bluelighter
Since I have a hx of alcohol abuse that I am always upfront about (I'm not about my drug use) no psychiatrist has ever been willing to prescribe me a benzo. Initially I carried a diagnosis of depression but it was changed and is actually PTSD from my childhood. I self medicated with alcohol in my teen years to avoid going totally crazy.
Been in an out of outpatient tx for 15 yrs, mostly on anti-depressants. I always tell new dr I have a Hx of alcohol abuse. They alway prescribe anti-d's which I am OK with and have taken a mood stabilizer and beta blocker, both OK with also.
But a few yrs ago I had a very thorough workup by a neurologist, including brain scan and detailed question and answer and standing, walking, etc, etc.... he diagnozed me with a 'rem sleep disorder' wasn't more specific but wrote a note to my psychiatrist recommending I take klonopin, this is the medication that works best for this type of condition. I act out in my sleep, in my nightmares, knocking over shit, etc.... like a PTSD reaction. Psychiatrist responded by prescribing clonodine. I accepted saying I was willing to try anything. It does help, but I want what is best for me. I also take my wife's xanax, at her behest b/c she see's how anxious I get and beleives I need it more than her.
I need a new psychiatrist and want to be on the meds that are best for me. I think klonopin is one of them from personal experience (I acquire lots of different drugs, both legal and illegal, and take them for rec and for tx purposes). Kpin does work best for sleep for me. Better than xanax, better than clonodine, better than ambien.
How should I go about finding a dr who will prescribe me what I want and need? Should I like about my alcohol history? Should I be upfront and say I feel I'm being discriminated against b/c of anxient history? Should I tell them I'm willing to pick up the meds weekly or osmething so they can see I"m not abusing them (I could abuse the helll out of them anytime I want by getting them on my own, right now I'm using xanax, not 'abusing' but using).
I don't know what records they will require, if any. Should I go to 'the street' to find out who the most liberal prescribers are? I also may wind up being psychiatrically disabled before the age of 65 and don't know if having one psychiatrist over another makes a difference? Should I go to a psych that see's mostly 'disabled' patients?
I have ton's of questions but first and foremost want a dr that isn't ignorant and will give me a try on klonopin for the sleep disorder I have (it impacts my work and my job is at risk, both my last 2 recent prescribers recognized this and agreed, yet neither would prescribe klonopin- now I"m not assertive in real life, I'm the opposite. Will assertiveness be enough? Should I have told that first psychiatrist "thanks for the clonodine recommendation but neurologists seem like pretty smart ppl and I did a very thorough workup and want the drug he thinks I need" and keep reiterating this? Should I tell them "prescribe me what you want but I'm gonna find it on the street and take it and will keep you aprised as to how I'm using it and how it's working as I'm 45 and want to feel normal and get decent treatment since I"m paying 12K/yr for medical care".
I have worked at the same company as a social worker myself for the past 18 years so don't exactly come across as unstable lifestyle wise, but do have way more than my share of emotional and psychological baggage, I know how to keep it hidden at work so people don't think I"m a nutcase and actually look up to me at work, just saying I don't present to dr's like a drug addict.
I've also considered going to a suboxone clinic, but due to my psychiatric issues getting worse I fear I may have to apply for disability at some point before age 65 and fear that if opiate tx is something in my files I could be denied with them saying "his problems started b/c of drug use, he's an addict, not a PTSD person who managed to work most of his life before ffinally falling all the way apart". I now have a wife and child ot think of.
I have other issues but want to focus on getting the right psychiatrist and the right medications in this one an how best to go about this. Any and all help/feedback appreciated.
Thanks,
Titus
Any and all feedback appreciated.
Been in an out of outpatient tx for 15 yrs, mostly on anti-depressants. I always tell new dr I have a Hx of alcohol abuse. They alway prescribe anti-d's which I am OK with and have taken a mood stabilizer and beta blocker, both OK with also.
But a few yrs ago I had a very thorough workup by a neurologist, including brain scan and detailed question and answer and standing, walking, etc, etc.... he diagnozed me with a 'rem sleep disorder' wasn't more specific but wrote a note to my psychiatrist recommending I take klonopin, this is the medication that works best for this type of condition. I act out in my sleep, in my nightmares, knocking over shit, etc.... like a PTSD reaction. Psychiatrist responded by prescribing clonodine. I accepted saying I was willing to try anything. It does help, but I want what is best for me. I also take my wife's xanax, at her behest b/c she see's how anxious I get and beleives I need it more than her.
I need a new psychiatrist and want to be on the meds that are best for me. I think klonopin is one of them from personal experience (I acquire lots of different drugs, both legal and illegal, and take them for rec and for tx purposes). Kpin does work best for sleep for me. Better than xanax, better than clonodine, better than ambien.
How should I go about finding a dr who will prescribe me what I want and need? Should I like about my alcohol history? Should I be upfront and say I feel I'm being discriminated against b/c of anxient history? Should I tell them I'm willing to pick up the meds weekly or osmething so they can see I"m not abusing them (I could abuse the helll out of them anytime I want by getting them on my own, right now I'm using xanax, not 'abusing' but using).
I don't know what records they will require, if any. Should I go to 'the street' to find out who the most liberal prescribers are? I also may wind up being psychiatrically disabled before the age of 65 and don't know if having one psychiatrist over another makes a difference? Should I go to a psych that see's mostly 'disabled' patients?
I have ton's of questions but first and foremost want a dr that isn't ignorant and will give me a try on klonopin for the sleep disorder I have (it impacts my work and my job is at risk, both my last 2 recent prescribers recognized this and agreed, yet neither would prescribe klonopin- now I"m not assertive in real life, I'm the opposite. Will assertiveness be enough? Should I have told that first psychiatrist "thanks for the clonodine recommendation but neurologists seem like pretty smart ppl and I did a very thorough workup and want the drug he thinks I need" and keep reiterating this? Should I tell them "prescribe me what you want but I'm gonna find it on the street and take it and will keep you aprised as to how I'm using it and how it's working as I'm 45 and want to feel normal and get decent treatment since I"m paying 12K/yr for medical care".
I have worked at the same company as a social worker myself for the past 18 years so don't exactly come across as unstable lifestyle wise, but do have way more than my share of emotional and psychological baggage, I know how to keep it hidden at work so people don't think I"m a nutcase and actually look up to me at work, just saying I don't present to dr's like a drug addict.
I've also considered going to a suboxone clinic, but due to my psychiatric issues getting worse I fear I may have to apply for disability at some point before age 65 and fear that if opiate tx is something in my files I could be denied with them saying "his problems started b/c of drug use, he's an addict, not a PTSD person who managed to work most of his life before ffinally falling all the way apart". I now have a wife and child ot think of.
I have other issues but want to focus on getting the right psychiatrist and the right medications in this one an how best to go about this. Any and all help/feedback appreciated.
Thanks,
Titus
Any and all feedback appreciated.
