neat

so i was reading some of my old blogs, which are only from like a year to six months ago. and god damn things were different. my boyfriend and i since broke up, and he fucking sucks. turns out everyone was right about him. it's insane how you can go from loving someone to hating their guts in a heartbeat. i feel much better without him. and i quit my xanax habit. it took a couple months and the withdrawal was hell. my anxiety still sucks, but whatever.

i feel like a completely different person. i started bartending. i have all my old friends back that i lost during my relationship with fuck face. i'm a little more confident. i've been going to different places, hanging out in philadelphia a lot. i found a sick swimming hole by my house. i throw parties out there all the time, i'm like the mother fucking party planner again. the spot is a half hour hike into the woods. i lost at least 15lbs and look better than ever. things are looking up for sure.

now all i need is another job, pay off my school loans and actually finish my degree. i feel good. i'm glad i bitched and moaned so much previously. because i thought i was depressed today, well damn, i don't feel near as shitty as i did a year ago.

fuck yeah, bluelight.