**I'm looking forward to any comments on this. Its a long one, I know.
My Year with the Jehovah’s Witnesses
I came in contact with a witness in Sept 2004. I had one of the worst days of my life. My brother Drew and I had gotten into a fight that day. He punched me in the head and broke his hand. I also had a bad day at school and I had to work. Just before I clocked in my boyfriend of nearly 2 years (Ryan) called and broke up with me. (We did get back together soon after.) I was bound and determined that I would get through this shift, and then go home and end it all. I had battled depression for many years and had previous suicide attempts and an inpatient hospital stay. I was 17 at this time.
Then a person I had never seen before came into the grocery store where I worked I soon learned that he worked there, but didn't have a uniform because he cleaned the floors. He (Tony) was really sweet to me. He later witnessed to me about God having a name and that name was Jehovah. This was completely new to me and I wanted to know more, maybe part of it was because I liked him.
I told him a lot of things that made me wonder why he even bothered still talking about Jehovah. I was a very open person, and soon told him that I was bisexual. I guess we never really talked about it. But I was living a life way out of line where the Jehovah’s Witnesses are concerned.
I would talk to me every day I worked and told me more about the witnesses, a relationship developed. I had mentioned him to my mom and she had said that the witness don't take blood so we talked about that. Soon he gave me a “Require” brochure. It covers the basic teachings of the Jehovah’s Witnesses and they things they believe Jehovah God requires of us. I was overjoyed, I read it over and over.
I left my boyfriend. He was in college and never aroundand didn't pay much attention to me, this guy did. I really liked him, so I consented to a Bible study, quit smoking, quit having sex, and quit going to the Methodist church, hoping it would keep things were I wanted them. Tony gave me my first copy of the New World Translation (NWT, the addition of the Bible the Jehovah’s Witnesses use).
My first study took place in the sit down area of the grocery store after work that October. I studied with a pioneer (full time preaching work, door to door) sister (baptized Jehovah’s Witnesses call each other brother and sister) named Jennifer. Our first 1 hour study we went through 3 lessons, which is quite quick for a Bible study. The following Sunday I was at the meeting at the Kingdom Hall (In order to show that they are separate from the rest of the world, JWs call their services “meetings” and their church a “Kingdom Hall”, which comes from the fact that they are waiting Jehovah to set up his Kingdom on earth).
Within a week or 2 I had finished the “Require” brochure and was on to the “Knowledge “book, a more in depth look into the beliefs of the JWs. I was attending all the meetings, several times a week.
My relationship with Tony progressed as well. We talked for hours on the phone every night; he was encouraging and seemed to really love Jehovah God. The more I was learning from the meetings the more I wanted to learn, although my mother had read up on the beliefs. She was opposed and gave me apostate (somebody who renounces a belief or allegiance) material. I took to the sister that I studied with (Jennifer). She explained to me, with the help of her mother (Diane) who because my "spiritual mother".
Halloween came around and I decided that I would not celebrate it as JWs do not believe in celebrating ANY of the normal holidays. I became a beacon of hope to the congregation, that there were still people out there that wanted “the truth” (this is what JWs call their beliefs).
The members of the congregation became my family, Jennifer and her husband Paul, who was an elder, were both pioneers and invited me into their home. I enjoyed being away from the constant fight of my family. Jennifer’s parents, Diane and Danny also were close to me, my "spiritual parents" because Paul and Jen
when in their 30s and didn't want to think that it would be possible to have kids my age. They preferred just to think of their dog as
their kid. Kara (Related to Paul and Jennifer) was my age, and graduated from high school a year before me was also a pioneer. I even had some in the congregation call me their adopted granddaughter. I finally got the love and acceptance that always seemed to be lacking in my life and relationships.
So many were impressed by my rapid progress, a month or 2 after my 1st study I enrolled in the ministry school and became a publisher (a person who goes out in “field service”, door to door ministry work. Talking to people and providing them with organizational magazines about “the truth”, but not full-time like a “pioneer”).
I was up every Saturday to go out in service, because of school I couldn't be out during the week. But at school, I was the "only" Jehovah’s Witnesses. There was one brother, but he wasn't in school much because he was taking courses at our local college. There was another guy who claimed to be a JW but didn’t really follow the guide lines set out for us.
I made my school my own territory (the area in which you are to try to contact people and tell them about “the truth”), and increased time with informal (not door to door) witnessing. It earned me a lot of persecution.
The relationship Tony grew. I knew a lot about him and his family, or so I thought. I found out later that a lot of what he told me were lies, so I’m not sure I know anything. A few months after he met me, he was talking about marriage. He told me how the witnesses viewed dating with much seriousness. You don’t date a person you can’t see yourself married to. I thought that the right thing was to go along. But since I shouldn't be dating yet because I wouldn't be 18 for a few months we needed to keep in under wraps. He gave me a box with an engagement ring in it, to show me what he hoped for our future. But you know teenage girls; he was all I could talk about. And soon there were questions from Jen and Paul. Paul told me that I should marry an young elder or an ministerial servant and Tony (I attended his baptism at the circuit assembly before I became a publisher) was neither. I ignored the counsel, they didn't know him like I did, and he just hasn't had the time. I told myself that the idea that I should marry an elder or something was crazy because I was so new to “the truth” that they wouldn’t believe that I was grounded enough in it.
The Jehovah’s Witnesses put a lot of emphasize on marriage. If you aren’t married you are alone. Many people get married soon after they turn 18. I also wanted the love, and unconditional acceptance and loyalty that would come with marriage. JWs don’t believe in divorce outside of cases of abuse or a husband refusing to care for his family. I suppose I was attracted to this in that I would never be alone and rejected again.
I continued to progress, Christmas time came around and I decided that I would not participate if I had a choice. I chose to do the Christmas things at school for choir and orchestra because it possibly could affect my grade. However I see now that I might have no wanted to let go off everything I have grown up doing during the holidays. However I did give up Christmas at home. My mother was VERY angry about this. My parents are divorced and remarried, she told me that me not sharing Christmas with the family was worse that my father leaving. It was very difficult from both sides.
That winter I had a car accident on an icy road. I hit a drain area on the curb and it made the air bags go off and broke the axle in my car. It had to be towed back to my house. I had the skin on my neck literally ripped off by the air bag, because of my height it actually caused more injury than it prevented. I wasn't sure what I was going to do, I had no way of getting to meetings. Tony bought a car for me, and even came and dropped it off. I decided that I couldn't take the car, and that he would have to figure out something to do with it, so he sold the car he already had and drove the one he
bought.
Paul and Jen picked me up for all the meetings. Paul even fixed my car for nearly nothing. And then when they were gone on a
trip, I wreaked in again. I'm not a very good driver; I had 2 accidents before these as well. With this one, I pulled out in front of someone and she hit the back of my car, insurance paid for hers but it was just body damage on both.
At some point in this mess I had turned 18; I didn't really come out with my relationship because I knew that some were against it. But Jen younger brother Josh who Tony had his Bible studies with before he was baptized didn't like it. He counseled Tony many times about it. I was hoping that he wouldn't say much to the Jen.
I had abandoned my dreams of going to college to be a vet; I wanted to marry Tony and pioneer with him. (Which was what he had lied to me and told me he was going out in field service). We met with Diane and Danny and discussed our relationship (I later found out that he had mislead them into thinking that this interest just started). They counseled us on the admonition to “marry only in the Lord” meaning we should wait till I was baptized to begin anything. They obviously didn't get the right information about the relationship.
My Year with the Jehovah’s Witnesses
I came in contact with a witness in Sept 2004. I had one of the worst days of my life. My brother Drew and I had gotten into a fight that day. He punched me in the head and broke his hand. I also had a bad day at school and I had to work. Just before I clocked in my boyfriend of nearly 2 years (Ryan) called and broke up with me. (We did get back together soon after.) I was bound and determined that I would get through this shift, and then go home and end it all. I had battled depression for many years and had previous suicide attempts and an inpatient hospital stay. I was 17 at this time.
Then a person I had never seen before came into the grocery store where I worked I soon learned that he worked there, but didn't have a uniform because he cleaned the floors. He (Tony) was really sweet to me. He later witnessed to me about God having a name and that name was Jehovah. This was completely new to me and I wanted to know more, maybe part of it was because I liked him.
I told him a lot of things that made me wonder why he even bothered still talking about Jehovah. I was a very open person, and soon told him that I was bisexual. I guess we never really talked about it. But I was living a life way out of line where the Jehovah’s Witnesses are concerned.
I would talk to me every day I worked and told me more about the witnesses, a relationship developed. I had mentioned him to my mom and she had said that the witness don't take blood so we talked about that. Soon he gave me a “Require” brochure. It covers the basic teachings of the Jehovah’s Witnesses and they things they believe Jehovah God requires of us. I was overjoyed, I read it over and over.
I left my boyfriend. He was in college and never aroundand didn't pay much attention to me, this guy did. I really liked him, so I consented to a Bible study, quit smoking, quit having sex, and quit going to the Methodist church, hoping it would keep things were I wanted them. Tony gave me my first copy of the New World Translation (NWT, the addition of the Bible the Jehovah’s Witnesses use).
My first study took place in the sit down area of the grocery store after work that October. I studied with a pioneer (full time preaching work, door to door) sister (baptized Jehovah’s Witnesses call each other brother and sister) named Jennifer. Our first 1 hour study we went through 3 lessons, which is quite quick for a Bible study. The following Sunday I was at the meeting at the Kingdom Hall (In order to show that they are separate from the rest of the world, JWs call their services “meetings” and their church a “Kingdom Hall”, which comes from the fact that they are waiting Jehovah to set up his Kingdom on earth).
Within a week or 2 I had finished the “Require” brochure and was on to the “Knowledge “book, a more in depth look into the beliefs of the JWs. I was attending all the meetings, several times a week.
My relationship with Tony progressed as well. We talked for hours on the phone every night; he was encouraging and seemed to really love Jehovah God. The more I was learning from the meetings the more I wanted to learn, although my mother had read up on the beliefs. She was opposed and gave me apostate (somebody who renounces a belief or allegiance) material. I took to the sister that I studied with (Jennifer). She explained to me, with the help of her mother (Diane) who because my "spiritual mother".
Halloween came around and I decided that I would not celebrate it as JWs do not believe in celebrating ANY of the normal holidays. I became a beacon of hope to the congregation, that there were still people out there that wanted “the truth” (this is what JWs call their beliefs).
The members of the congregation became my family, Jennifer and her husband Paul, who was an elder, were both pioneers and invited me into their home. I enjoyed being away from the constant fight of my family. Jennifer’s parents, Diane and Danny also were close to me, my "spiritual parents" because Paul and Jen
when in their 30s and didn't want to think that it would be possible to have kids my age. They preferred just to think of their dog as
their kid. Kara (Related to Paul and Jennifer) was my age, and graduated from high school a year before me was also a pioneer. I even had some in the congregation call me their adopted granddaughter. I finally got the love and acceptance that always seemed to be lacking in my life and relationships.
So many were impressed by my rapid progress, a month or 2 after my 1st study I enrolled in the ministry school and became a publisher (a person who goes out in “field service”, door to door ministry work. Talking to people and providing them with organizational magazines about “the truth”, but not full-time like a “pioneer”).
I was up every Saturday to go out in service, because of school I couldn't be out during the week. But at school, I was the "only" Jehovah’s Witnesses. There was one brother, but he wasn't in school much because he was taking courses at our local college. There was another guy who claimed to be a JW but didn’t really follow the guide lines set out for us.
I made my school my own territory (the area in which you are to try to contact people and tell them about “the truth”), and increased time with informal (not door to door) witnessing. It earned me a lot of persecution.
The relationship Tony grew. I knew a lot about him and his family, or so I thought. I found out later that a lot of what he told me were lies, so I’m not sure I know anything. A few months after he met me, he was talking about marriage. He told me how the witnesses viewed dating with much seriousness. You don’t date a person you can’t see yourself married to. I thought that the right thing was to go along. But since I shouldn't be dating yet because I wouldn't be 18 for a few months we needed to keep in under wraps. He gave me a box with an engagement ring in it, to show me what he hoped for our future. But you know teenage girls; he was all I could talk about. And soon there were questions from Jen and Paul. Paul told me that I should marry an young elder or an ministerial servant and Tony (I attended his baptism at the circuit assembly before I became a publisher) was neither. I ignored the counsel, they didn't know him like I did, and he just hasn't had the time. I told myself that the idea that I should marry an elder or something was crazy because I was so new to “the truth” that they wouldn’t believe that I was grounded enough in it.
The Jehovah’s Witnesses put a lot of emphasize on marriage. If you aren’t married you are alone. Many people get married soon after they turn 18. I also wanted the love, and unconditional acceptance and loyalty that would come with marriage. JWs don’t believe in divorce outside of cases of abuse or a husband refusing to care for his family. I suppose I was attracted to this in that I would never be alone and rejected again.
I continued to progress, Christmas time came around and I decided that I would not participate if I had a choice. I chose to do the Christmas things at school for choir and orchestra because it possibly could affect my grade. However I see now that I might have no wanted to let go off everything I have grown up doing during the holidays. However I did give up Christmas at home. My mother was VERY angry about this. My parents are divorced and remarried, she told me that me not sharing Christmas with the family was worse that my father leaving. It was very difficult from both sides.
That winter I had a car accident on an icy road. I hit a drain area on the curb and it made the air bags go off and broke the axle in my car. It had to be towed back to my house. I had the skin on my neck literally ripped off by the air bag, because of my height it actually caused more injury than it prevented. I wasn't sure what I was going to do, I had no way of getting to meetings. Tony bought a car for me, and even came and dropped it off. I decided that I couldn't take the car, and that he would have to figure out something to do with it, so he sold the car he already had and drove the one he
bought.
Paul and Jen picked me up for all the meetings. Paul even fixed my car for nearly nothing. And then when they were gone on a
trip, I wreaked in again. I'm not a very good driver; I had 2 accidents before these as well. With this one, I pulled out in front of someone and she hit the back of my car, insurance paid for hers but it was just body damage on both.
At some point in this mess I had turned 18; I didn't really come out with my relationship because I knew that some were against it. But Jen younger brother Josh who Tony had his Bible studies with before he was baptized didn't like it. He counseled Tony many times about it. I was hoping that he wouldn't say much to the Jen.
I had abandoned my dreams of going to college to be a vet; I wanted to marry Tony and pioneer with him. (Which was what he had lied to me and told me he was going out in field service). We met with Diane and Danny and discussed our relationship (I later found out that he had mislead them into thinking that this interest just started). They counseled us on the admonition to “marry only in the Lord” meaning we should wait till I was baptized to begin anything. They obviously didn't get the right information about the relationship.