My Penis

[Edvard Munch]

Penis, penis
My penis
Thou spitting serpent of the sea

Penis, penis
My penis
Thou holy exit of my pee

I go to bars to pick up hoes
Buy them liquor to instigate much needed blows

If she screams, just pinch her
So she can take my seventeen incher

Then, when I nail her
I make her call my penis "Vlad the Impaler."

Penis, penis
... MY PENIS!!!

(Authors note: It's okay to praise my piece for it's outstanding literary genious. Don't be shy.)

 

[*Venus*]

LMFAO... I wish I had a penis.