My log on Cipralex and Medazepam

Ok just found out now while I changed my clothes I've noticed some small dots on my skin, like some small blitsters they are not itchy , let's say more dry . Is this eczema ? As a side effect of the anti-dep ?
 
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8th day

When the hell will I wake up and say this will be a good day ?
I feel a bit anxious, but an anxiety that is masked , also my head feels like it's a bit numb , I can't explain the sensation .
The sleep was great/deep like it seems to be lately , but damn I hate it when I wake up, after about 20-30 mins I start getting this weird sensations .
When will this stop and I will be able to not fight myself to go outside ? Where is the old me that would even pay money to not stay in his house and get bored outside ?

Yes I know the routine I go outside I feel a bet panicky, out of the world and anxious . Go somewhere sit for a while and after that I can pretty much have a good time without feeling anxious and disconnected , but I'm sick of this routine and having to feel like this ...


New update:

Feeling a bit better, had a shower and I was thinking that I can't go on like this without telling anyone about my medication(from my friend group). So i've picked thru my friends and decided to tell one , hoping to meet him later today so I can tell him about why I've been avoiding getting out and doing other activities that we used to do. He has been thru a lot of problems and he is also leaving the country on friday. I'm feeling that after being friends for so many years at least he must hear why I was avoiding staying with him for the short time he has left before he leaves.
 
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9th day

Well It seems I got what I asked for, I'm feeling better this morning . No anxiety , I'm not tired or anything. :-? will keep you updated.
 
That's wicked man. I think that you could prejudice your situation by constantly and in such great detail scrutinising your feelings. Anxiety and depression are so obviously internal and cognitive that you may be essentially feeding them. I think you would need to wait 2 weeks for the depression and up to 4 weeks for the anxiety before being able to say that it hasn't worked.
 
10th day
@ suessmayr Yeah :D <snip>. It's not like everything is fine , but I'm starting to feel the drug work:-? Will keep you posted !
 
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Ok this is day 21-22.
Anyway, I feel way better, no more panic attacks after smoking a cig, I think I'm not even anxious anymore :-? I don't feel 100% yet but I'm getting there.
Also I drank some beers these days, smoked some w without any bad side effects.
No more side-effects from Cipralex also.. If you guys have any other questions I will be glad to answer them.
 
Day 24, as I said I have no more panic attacks . But today I feel just like I wanna cry without any reason but I can't, I feel kind of depressed ... a trigger could be probably that I'm very bored I have nothing to do spent a lot of my time in my house because I have no money, and my current friends that are available only want to smoke weed or just drive around the city with the car .... :-? Also I as I said in the above post I'm not totally happy , happy is also not the word to describe the current feeling :-? I will go and talk with my doctor tomorrow. could this mean that I have to up the dosage on Cipralex ?

I can't wait to move out of the city in 1 month max, It will be a real change . I will have things to get busy with (college) and hope I will find happiness and some meaning to life since I lost it , it's pretty much all black and white for me since I'm always thinking about the future seeing that It's so hard to get a job that pays well. Pretty scary huh ? Since I'm only 19 ...
 
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