8th day
When the hell will I wake up and say this will be a good day ?
I feel a bit anxious, but an anxiety that is masked , also my head feels like it's a bit numb , I can't explain the sensation .
The sleep was great/deep like it seems to be lately , but damn I hate it when I wake up, after about 20-30 mins I start getting this weird sensations .
When will this stop and I will be able to not fight myself to go outside ? Where is the old me that would even pay money to not stay in his house and get bored outside ?
Yes I know the routine I go outside I feel a bet panicky, out of the world and anxious . Go somewhere sit for a while and after that I can pretty much have a good time without feeling anxious and disconnected , but I'm sick of this routine and having to feel like this ...
New update:
Feeling a bit better, had a shower and I was thinking that I can't go on like this without telling anyone about my medication(from my friend group). So i've picked thru my friends and decided to tell one , hoping to meet him later today so I can tell him about why I've been avoiding getting out and doing other activities that we used to do. He has been thru a lot of problems and he is also leaving the country on friday. I'm feeling that after being friends for so many years at least he must hear why I was avoiding staying with him for the short time he has left before he leaves.