This post is about her but if your knew around here, this ones about me: my psychological profile.
Codependency is a tendency to behave in overly passive or excessively caretaking ways. It also often involves putting one's needs at a lower priority than others while being excessively preoccupied with the needs of others. It may also be characterized by denial, low self-esteem, excessive compliance, and/or control patterns. It describes behavior, thoughts and feelings that go beyond normal kinds of self-sacrifice or care taking.
You are a codependent if...
Some controversial behaviors ascribed to codependent personalities are as follows:
Unresolved patterns of codependency can lead to more serious problems like alcoholism, drug addiction, eating disorders, sex addiction, and other self-destructive or self-defeating behaviors. People with codependency are also more likely to stay in stressful jobs or relationships, less likely to seek medical attention when needed and are also less likely to get promotions and tend to earn less money than those without codependency patterns.
Denial patterns:
Related reading:Fear of Abandonment, Dependent personality disorder, Submissive, Self-Control, Signs of an Abusive Relationship, Attachment In Adults, Rejected by mother, Personality Traits
in Abusive Relationships.
Codependency is a tendency to behave in overly passive or excessively caretaking ways. It also often involves putting one's needs at a lower priority than others while being excessively preoccupied with the needs of others. It may also be characterized by denial, low self-esteem, excessive compliance, and/or control patterns. It describes behavior, thoughts and feelings that go beyond normal kinds of self-sacrifice or care taking.
You are a codependent if...
- If you are married to or in a relationship with an alcoholic or addicted person
- If you feel like you are not "complete" without another person
- If you are continually rescuing your teen, child, spouse, etc.
- If you feel responsible for their behaviors, actions, or feelings
- If you are always taking care of others to the sacrifice of yourself
Some controversial behaviors ascribed to codependent personalities are as follows:
"Going from one extreme to the other." Sometimes an individual can, in attempts to recover from codependency, go from being overly passive or overly giving to being overly aggressive or excessively selfish. Many therapists maintain that finding a balance through healthy assertiveness (which leaves room for being a caring person and also engaging in healthy caring behavior), is true recovery from codependency and that becoming extremely selfish, a bully, or an otherwise conflict-addicted person, is not.
Victim mentality. According to this perspective, developing a permanent stance of being a victim (having a "victim mentality") would also not constitute true recovery from codependency and could be another example of going from one extreme to another. A victim mentality could also be seen as a part of one's original state of codependency (lack of empowerment causing one to feel like the 'subject' of events rather than being an empowered actor). Someone truly recovered from codependency would feel empowered and like an author of their life and actions rather than being at the mercy of outside forces. A victim mentality may also occur in combination with passive-aggressive control issues. From the perspective of moving beyond victim-hood, the capacity to forgive and let go (with exception of cases of very severe abuse) could also be signs of real recovery from codependency, but the willingness to endure further abuse would not.
Unresolved patterns of codependency can lead to more serious problems like alcoholism, drug addiction, eating disorders, sex addiction, and other self-destructive or self-defeating behaviors. People with codependency are also more likely to stay in stressful jobs or relationships, less likely to seek medical attention when needed and are also less likely to get promotions and tend to earn less money than those without codependency patterns.
Denial patterns:
- I minimize, alter or deny how I truly feel.
- I perceive myself as completely unselfish and dedicated to the well being of others.
- I have difficulty making decisions.
- I do not ask others to meet my needs or desires.
- I value others' approval of my thinking, feelings and behavior over my own.
- I compromise my own values and integrity to avoid rejection or others' anger.
- I put aside my own interests and hobbies in order to do what others want.
- I accept sex when I want love.
- I lavish gifts and favors on those I care about.
- I use sex to gain approval and acceptance.
- I have to be "needed" in order to have a relationship with others.
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Related reading:Fear of Abandonment, Dependent personality disorder, Submissive, Self-Control, Signs of an Abusive Relationship, Attachment In Adults, Rejected by mother, Personality Traits
in Abusive Relationships.
