my experience with oxycontin

[artist1]

at an early age i always had a void to fill.i filled that with eating.then weight traing.obviouslynwith an extremly addictive personality going to extrems was normal for me.when i lost a job at 19 and a girlfreind my world crashed so once again i had a void.in short i got addicted to heroin then i eventualy got on to the methodone program got clean and got a job.this mite seem to be a glowing experience with drug rehabilitation.but if anyone out there can relate once you have gone to the extremes of drug abuse it leaves a mark on you that never goes away.so i did in some ways carry this issue with me even though i was technically clean.i then did many rehad programs and finally got an average bluecollor job and becam functional again.
a year ago i hurt myself at work and suffered and bulging and ruptured disc with cyatic nerve damage and a full foot drop wich mean the nerve signal was cut off and i was loosing the use oif my leg.this was extremly painful.ironically the standard treatment was heavy painkillers and valium.one of my past favourite cocktails.i went for and opperation to remove the disc but was left with cronic pain and nerve damage.i did not seek it nore did i want it but morphine and endone,valium and oxycontin for long term painreleif was perscribed.
a year later i am on 20 mg 3 times a day and valuim when needed.basically i can go to any doctor with my current medical condition and score any number of benzos and painkillers.tramadol,pandadinefort.codein,endone or oxycontin.your average g.p just seems to put it into the to hard basket and throw script after script at me.there are two parts of me.one saying why?why was i given this condition with my past history.becasue the honest truth is i was so scared to have the op. becasue i knew it would lead to a relapes in opiate based drugs.the other part of me says yes!ive got a constant and reaidly availability to my drugs of choice that i loved so much in my early 20s.lets not beat around the bush oxy,although slightly different in its feelings and response in your body is very close to scoreing a nice chunk of good quality smack or heroin.what i have not done is seek out heroin on the street but i take my oxy as perscribed but if i whish i can go up to 40 mg if the pain becomes to intense or even the rare 80 mg pills.but i havent.
i keep teeling myself this is for thereputic use only but occasionally i do indulge in extra doseing.what i did not expect was not only the warm and fuzzy relaxed feeling and the dreamy like nodding off that i love but also the euphoria that also comes with oxycontin.the talkativness.the elation that i feel.im trying to tapper off but when the pain kicks in i still reach for the oxy.
i am once again addicted but this time im classed as a patient with chronic pain.not a dirty junkie which by the way i hate the term junkie.lawyers,doctors,police and your average housewife all have there little habbit going.oxycontin is no joke.be carefull.please comment on your medical experiences with oxycontin or any experience.i would like to hear from others who can relate.

 

[belarki]

Hi artist1, welcome to bluelight. Thanks for the background story There are a few here on opiates for pain-management that I'm sure would be happy to chat with you, give you advice etc. Check out this thread: opiates for pain.

 

[Fieldy]

please post in paragraphs as its hard to read on the eyes.

 

[slortaone]

damn. ms contin, endone, oxycontin and valium to a recovering heroin addict?

 

[pisspotnrock]

fuck readin that.. edit and paragraph...............................

^^ is that what he had? which a previous drug use record???????????

 

[slortaone]

according to his story, yes.

 

[pisspotnrock]

wow can i pls have the name of your GP?

 

[Oxycondone]

Remember the OP underwent serious surgery. Reluctant as a doctor may be to prescribe to a reformed addict opiates, ethics dictate that if someone is in severe pain strong pain medication should be made available to them despite their questionable earlier life decisions.

Anyway great to hear your story artist, welcome to bluelight, I hope it helps you out as much as it has done for me. I too am a pain patient and am walking a very similar path as yourself. Once upon a time I also used to play around with opiates but now I'm trying very hard to keep it therapeutic and not over indulge, although I do every now and again. I have a hoarding/security issue and I'm always a bit scared of being cut off meds so I find myself getting scripts for stronger and more painkillers than I need just so I can hoard them.

The biggest problem I have now isn't my psychological addiction (which is basically non existent) but a physical dependence which developed covertly when I let my guard down. Now I have to take meds everyday not just for pain but just to keep the withdrawals at bay. The only problem is I know if I don't get my dependence down soon it, as well as tolerance, will only get worse It's a bloody hard cycle.

Feel free to PM when you reach bluelighter status and keep us updated on your journey.

 

[wazza]

I'm on a somewhat similar thing myself. Nerve damage in 06, went through hell for a couple years with regards to pain (also NO arm movement, 'dead limb' due to nerve damage from a stupidly low speed mbike injury, I guess I just fell 'awkwardly' or something as I had no bone damage in shoulder so hospital sent me home later on for me to come back with no arm movement, them stressing and finally finding out, nerve damage. bleh but that's long memories ago now)

These days, I have some movement back, a bit of chronic pain stll, less pain from start but extra pain brought on from my fucked shoulder 'hanging' off and pulling/stretching stuff causing extra pain that keeps slowly building up. So, drugs, tramal, oxycontin, lyrica are the staples, I vary them according to my pain and cycle waking up in the morning with little to no meds from the night (= OUCH but I still know how much fucking pain I have so I know that I'm not actually healing up but taking the same/similar amount of meds) and stuff. Meds for sleep due to insomnia and I sometimes do 8 hr panadol or codeine + ibuprofen tabs as 'small supplementary meds'

Originally I was on up to 400-600mg oxy per day for a while (3-54 months after my initial injury) due to a GP not going by the rules and prescribing stuff just to 'get me through the day'. He got busted and found myself being given NO more oxy for a while cause he must've been given a new arsehole by whatever authority busted him. Luckily I had no WDs, prolly either via the continued use of tramal and/or I'm "weird" with opiates, morphine in hospital post surgeries has always done ZERO, even in my teens etc. Guess I metabalise them not as good as 'normal' people, I also needed HEAPS of oxy originally before it even began to really work, such as (NEVER had opiates outside hospital before) needing 20mg time-release, 3 days later, needing more due to it stopping 'working', and kept happening so hence I was up to 100s of mg's doses per day every day quite early on.

So, now days. typically on 2-3 80 mg's a day, 1-3 20mg insta release oxy, 1-2 tramal 200mg time release and a bit of lyrica each night. After surgery in late 06 (6 month'ish after initial injury) I needed oxy again for pain caused from VERY invasive surgery and subsequent 'heavy' shit happening with my shoulder. For a couple years (more?) I was able to have oxy every 1-4 days when needed, past couple years now it's most days but some days I can go on 1 80mg oxy but on the rare day I feel 'good' pain wise, I don't have oxy at all OR have one late in day if I need to do physical activity as that agitates my arm/injury/pain.

I still do the odd extra dose for a 'little bit of fun', oh yeah, for a few years I've been having DL-PA, DL-Phenylalanine as it literally gives me like 100% opiate potentiating affects so hence I've been able to 'cut down' the doses I should be on if I wasn't using DLPA. I've done this post on a cold morning *flares up the pain* so I may be dribbling crap, I won't be able to tell until later when the meds have kicked in, so I hope I've been able to express my (current) situation at all.

If you need someone to talk to/whatever, I'm free to take PMs, as mentioned above, when you hit bluelighter status (50 posts possibly?) so you can send + receive PMs. But I cringe when thinking of the coming winter, I'll be 'stuck' home a lot more than usual, I usually spend most days busy, morning at pool/hydrotherapy, my wife and I (and 19 month old daughter) out doing various things, shopping, etc, mainly to keep moving around, then home at least before too 'late' (3-5 pm now days) so we can get dinner for the family and I'm home before cold kicks in or else it can (literally) cripple me down.

Wishing you the best and please add paragraphs, my writing/expressionism may be down the shit but I think it helps doing paragraphs for people to read, I read some of your post but couldn't read it all due to the look/cramped feel of the post sorry, too hard for this pain inflicted brain to read.. (said with a smile)