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mxe the life and death of

Phoenix_rising

Bluelighter
Joined
Sep 22, 2010
Messages
592
ofHello fellow pioneers,

Im back...Back from a place that is indescribable,but,i`m going to try to the best of my knowledge to interpret just that. Recently i bought 30 sedekopan etizolam and a gram of very pure methoxetamine,let me just add that i am very experienced in the use of such substances.

Friday the 3rd Nov evening i retired to my bedroom at approximately 10.30pm,i decided to take 1mg of etizolam to remove any anxiety before i plugged 80mg of methoxetamine,i was at the time quit exhausted. After taking the drugs i lay in bed waiting for what ensued,but to my amazement,after abstaining from drugs for a peroid of a few months,except may i add the daily dose of 8mg buprenorphine,that nothing notable happened,i thought that maybe the buprenorphine was blocking the other substances,so i took 3mg more of etizolam and then another whopping dose of 150mg of methoxetamine. After this i must have fallen asleep and then entered an MXE hole,but whilst sleeping,i do not remember much,only that i woke the next day feeling absolutely amazing,every fibre of my soul tingled and buzzed with life and energy,i felt as if my entire DNA had been reassembled for the better,that i had metamorphised into a new being...Is this possible? I asked myself.
I hadn`t realised that that night i had consumed 30mg of etizolam,but to my amazement i functioned the next day completely normal,my balance was in check,my coherence and articulation was good,for all intense and purpose i was more on the ball than most,so after work i went to the pub to consume four pints of 5% beer,after this i went home and went to bed early.

9.30 that evening i decided to take 120mg of methoxetamine,plugged,i started to MXE hole whilst awake,then whilst in the MXE hole,to my astonishment whilst on MXE i managed to take 3mg of etizolam,again i went to sleep whilst in the MXE hole,this time i went through the boundaries of space and time,whilst asleep i dreamt that i was awake on MXE,in my dream whilst on MXE i took etizolam and MXE then fell asleep,whilst asleep i dreamt the whole thing again,i died,went into the universe of all things,i was turned inside out,i was in every atom and every atom was in me,i went back in time and to the future,i woke several times in my dream and also when awake,when awake in realiity i didn`t know i was awake and couldn`t differentiate what was what,there was no heaven or hell,there was nothing and everything,i wanted to become conscious but to stay in this other world,i wanted to be conscious so that i could fathom it,to understand the secret of what life,death and everything in the middle meant.

When i did finally awake into this reality i was told by my father that i did wake the previous morning and was pretty spaced out,that i poured my cornflakes into my tea cup,that my work partner came to get me but i was too fucked to do anything,he gave me a telling off of course but told me to go back to bed which i did after taking 2mg more of etizolam and another 100mg of methoxetamine. I woke this morning the 5th Nov still pretty fucked but was able to do some work until it rained and now im back home writing this. Most people would think,"your fucking mad" which i would reply,"im beyond mad". I`m feeling the after glow of a NDE,actually it was more than an NDE and more like a rising from the dead,i`ve had a christ experience,a life and death experience and funnily enough a strange desire to go back again. Death is nothing to be scared of but something to be embrased whole heartedly for life and death are the same,they are just a reflection of one another and to dream is just the place inbetween.
 
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Death is nothing to be scared of but something to be embrased whole heartedly for life and death are the same,they are just a reflection of one another and to dream is just the place inbetween.


Welcome to being sentient...
A quest that is as eternal as it is infinite.
 
Combining huge amounts of MXE and benzos is a good way to end up missing large chunks of time. Chances are you are not "on the ball" as you think, you're just feeling too good to notice you're probably slurring your speech and the like.
 
Be careful not to lose your job messing around like that during the work day. Save the etiz for at night, or better yet wean off it. MXE in very low doses throughout the day (if anything) and take more at night if you please.

Just my good advice.
 
Why be sorry lucidsdreamr? It`s your opinion and your entitled to it...Good for you to voice it. :-)
 
@ seiko,if my speech was slurred i would definitely have been told by the people around me,but no one noticed anything.
 
Meh... been there enough times lmao. Can be a heap of fun but it really messes with day to day life, makes social interactions difficult :).I got stupid mostly while I was on holidays/time off work at the time lol. To much mxe can lead to some toxicity at least when ingested with heaps of etoh as 2 passed out uni students discovered after ingesting "MDMA" caps that were in fact MXE in my country. I've used low doses of benzo's usually 1mg xanax or 2.5 mg diazepam but I can relate to the semi lucid and slightly confused mindset of acting while under the influence of a few 80 mg lines during the day :).

Seen a lot of death first hand, I have really accepted death as part of life/living. To do otherwise is to deny or own mortality, as being alive results eventually in death. I think, based on my own perceptions/experiences some substances cause uncomfortable concept's to be pushed to the for if it's something you have had to deal with and it's left some kind of psychological trauma either conscious or subconscious. It often causes you to analyse and explore these concepts or recoil in fear depending on the acceptance you have of the concept/fear experienced. Unlike empathogenic substances like MDMA dissociatives seem to force things uncomfortable to be examined especially if it's prominent in the subconscious mind.
 
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