kittyinthedark
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Mar 23, 2004
- Messages
- 10,887
Mushrooms - Experienced - WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?
I've tripped on mushrooms a number of times before, as well as 2C-I, acid, and dex, but I had never experienced anything even CLOSE to what I felt last Saturday. A friend of my bf gave us some mushroom chocolates he had made "special" with some added cannabutter; each contained about half an eighth of shrooms (i'm not sure what species). I have had some pretty good trips with a whole eighth before, but nothing *too* entirely crazy, so I wasn't expecting the trip to be anything too intense with only half that amount. My bf and I ate one chocolate each, and then went to his house to bum around and play video games.
I was feeling not entirely too impressed when all of a sudden, BAM! I was tripping my fucking (metaphorical
) balls off! It was a mindfuck of unbelievable proportions. Most psychedelics definitely alter my state of mind, but the thoughts going on in my head were just insane, just completely different from anything I had experienced before. I had a complete loss of self, where at first I was really confused about who I was, and then I kept thinking that I *was* my boyfriend.... fuckin weird.... It was to the point where I thought so much that I was male that I couldn't bring myself to kiss him (we're normally very kissy and cuddly) because I was really confused why he would be attracted to a boy, especially someone who looked just like him...8( (he's not anti-gay or anything, he's just absolutely without a doubt straight, so I was very confuzzled.) I had to keep looking at myself in the bathroom mirror to remember what I looked like and who I was.
I was so confused and anxious (even terrified) that after awhile I had to go sit outside on the front porch to try to sort things out, not that I could. I sat outside for what felt like hours, but was actually 10 minutes, just trying and trying to figure out who the hell I was and what the fuck was going on. I didn't really get anywhere with that.... It was especially odd because I still had a "normal" stream of consciousness going on in my head mixed up with the "insane" one. I kept reminding myself that in not too long I would be sober again, and that I was in fact myself, but right away after I would think it, I would become confused again. It was like my "normal" consciousness was trying to push its way through my altered one, but the altered train of thought was just beating it down every time it surfaced.
After about an hour of this, an absolute ETERNITY to me, I started coming down a bit, at least enough to calm myself down and re-objectify my situation. After the ridiculously insane peak, the rest of the trip was really quite enjoyable, just like any other trip. I was very relaxed and it was fun to watch the posters on the wall melting and shifting around. I played some Final Fantasy X (the best game in existence!!! even better while tripping!) and ate some munchies and talked with my boyfriend and the other people that had come over.
The rest of the evening was really pretty much normal. (as normal as a shroom trip can be anyhow...) I bummed around and took some bong hits and watched another friend eat one of the same chocolates i had taken... that was, needless to say, interesting. Has anyone else had an experience like this? I'm certainly going to be a bit more cautious with my next shroom trip... That's not to say that this trip wasn't productive, it was incredibly enlightening in terms of seeing some of my inner, hidden fears and really, really analyzing myself in the most objective way possible. When you think you're someone else you can really see all your own flaws. It's just that the experience was so intense it's probably not something that should be repeated with any frequency. Anyone have anything to say about this weirdness? I'd appreciate any comments that anyone wants to leave.
I've tripped on mushrooms a number of times before, as well as 2C-I, acid, and dex, but I had never experienced anything even CLOSE to what I felt last Saturday. A friend of my bf gave us some mushroom chocolates he had made "special" with some added cannabutter; each contained about half an eighth of shrooms (i'm not sure what species). I have had some pretty good trips with a whole eighth before, but nothing *too* entirely crazy, so I wasn't expecting the trip to be anything too intense with only half that amount. My bf and I ate one chocolate each, and then went to his house to bum around and play video games.
I was feeling not entirely too impressed when all of a sudden, BAM! I was tripping my fucking (metaphorical
) balls off! It was a mindfuck of unbelievable proportions. Most psychedelics definitely alter my state of mind, but the thoughts going on in my head were just insane, just completely different from anything I had experienced before. I had a complete loss of self, where at first I was really confused about who I was, and then I kept thinking that I *was* my boyfriend.... fuckin weird.... It was to the point where I thought so much that I was male that I couldn't bring myself to kiss him (we're normally very kissy and cuddly) because I was really confused why he would be attracted to a boy, especially someone who looked just like him...8( (he's not anti-gay or anything, he's just absolutely without a doubt straight, so I was very confuzzled.) I had to keep looking at myself in the bathroom mirror to remember what I looked like and who I was. I was so confused and anxious (even terrified) that after awhile I had to go sit outside on the front porch to try to sort things out, not that I could. I sat outside for what felt like hours, but was actually 10 minutes, just trying and trying to figure out who the hell I was and what the fuck was going on. I didn't really get anywhere with that.... It was especially odd because I still had a "normal" stream of consciousness going on in my head mixed up with the "insane" one. I kept reminding myself that in not too long I would be sober again, and that I was in fact myself, but right away after I would think it, I would become confused again. It was like my "normal" consciousness was trying to push its way through my altered one, but the altered train of thought was just beating it down every time it surfaced.
After about an hour of this, an absolute ETERNITY to me, I started coming down a bit, at least enough to calm myself down and re-objectify my situation. After the ridiculously insane peak, the rest of the trip was really quite enjoyable, just like any other trip. I was very relaxed and it was fun to watch the posters on the wall melting and shifting around. I played some Final Fantasy X (the best game in existence!!! even better while tripping!
) and ate some munchies and talked with my boyfriend and the other people that had come over. The rest of the evening was really pretty much normal. (as normal as a shroom trip can be anyhow...) I bummed around and took some bong hits and watched another friend eat one of the same chocolates i had taken... that was, needless to say, interesting. Has anyone else had an experience like this? I'm certainly going to be a bit more cautious with my next shroom trip... That's not to say that this trip wasn't productive, it was incredibly enlightening in terms of seeing some of my inner, hidden fears and really, really analyzing myself in the most objective way possible. When you think you're someone else you can really see all your own flaws.
It's just that the experience was so intense it's probably not something that should be repeated with any frequency. Anyone have anything to say about this weirdness? I'd appreciate any comments that anyone wants to leave.
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