qwe
Bluelight Crew
Dose{ ~0.75g. First time shrooms. Experience may be influenced by 10mg methadone taken in the morning (no opioid tolerance)}
Set{ Expecting very minor effects from such a low dose, hopefully a little mental clarity, which is what I was lacking and seeking} <-- I was in for a big surprise!
Setting{ At night, in my room for the most part}
Chronometer{
T+0.00 8:45
T+0.75 Onset and nausea (latter negated by pepto bismol)
T+1.50 Peak
T+3.00 Peaking stronger and stronger
T+3.50 It is getting more intense as it reveals some unsettling facts. I am begining to feel trapped. I'd like it to set me down now ~.~ certainty will come back in the morning, for better or worse
T+4.00 It's letting me down now
}
Mental effects{
Clearing out garbage: I just went through a do-it-yourself psychotherapy session. I recognized all the ways that my mind is incongruent with how I'd like it to be, I analyzed, I accepted what need be, and let everything go, starting afresh. Before, I had no clue how much "luggage" I was carrying around (even though I was trying to boil my mind down to simplicity, I never succeeded)
Alert: Before my trip, for a while, I haven't had much motivation, my mind has been sorta foggy, bored. This trip feels like somewhat of a re-birth. Like I just went on vacation into bliss and now I'm ready for anything. Will this hold up once I'm back to real life? Stay tuned for follow up report
I also realize certain things that I shouldn't be taking for granted, but I have been
Breathing: Breathing becomes significant, and very peaceful. Alot is going on with my breathing. I get shortness of breath sometimes at the intensity of the effects, at other times I have to take big breaths
Smiling: I laugh a little sometimes and smile sometimes. At whatever I'm thinking about (I very easily laugh right now) or at the amazing-ness of the visuals. When I smile it's like smiling for the first time...
Somato: Like a mild marijuana, I feel floaty and distorted. It is very very pleasant. This is the body buzz I've been seeking with opioids, but never reaching it. The body buzz is very intense, however, and clings forcefully
Euphoria: The euphoria is very real and full, but I can see how delicate it is. It rests on my comfort with many aspects of the trip, especially my body sensations. I can see how easily this euphoria could be turned into dysphoria and send me into a "bummer": it takes some work to keep it up
Clarity: This entire trip report is being written as I'm peaking
Summ: I consistently get the feeling that this is something to be respected, cherished, and my dosing with this drug should be spaced out over months. This doesn't feel like a drug. It feels like a key to myself
}
Visual effects{
OEV---
Patterning: Patterns are everywhere, if I let them develop. On my (completely white) floor tiles, I saw vibrant dynamic alive "ancient-looking" patterns develop. On my uniformly tan carpet, patterns of flowers and such form.
Afterimages: Everyone's familiar with this, no explanation needed. An interesting note is that this is happening with my body sense, not just visual sense. I scratch my face, and feel the scratch for up to a minute afterward
Myself in the mirror: No words...
CEV---
Like many different drugs in one. Sometimes my closed-eye vision will be one way, at other times it's like i'm on a completely different drug. The following description merely scratches the surface
Lines: Thousands of curvy lines surface, flowing, dynamic, shaded, alive, making up images and such. This particular CEV "set" is completely different than my cannabis-induced visions
Points: Points on my visual field radiate light. Sometimes I'm confused because it seems like my eyes must be half-open or something. But they're fully closed and my arms are covering my eyes so that no light penetrates
Color: Areas turn into pure color, colors merge and interact in sparkly magic-looking orgies of color
Summ: Shrooms give an earthy, organic, geometric, engaging scenery which appears "embedded" into my visual field
}
POST SCRIPT
Emotional enlightenment: While the intellectual and visual disturbances stopped at T+4, the mushrooms continued to show me important emotional content as I was laying in bed intending to sleep. At one point I had a sort of 'break-through,' crying, learning, and immediately acting on the knowledge gained.
Syncronicity: I will detail a couple examples (out of dozens). 1. This was the perfect night to try shrooms, I needed its lessons at that exact time. 2. Winamp was on shuffle, and Pink Floyd - Poles Apart played while I was laying on my bed, incidentally the song that played on shuffle while I was laying on my bed during my first psychedelic experience (first cannabis experience)
Insomnia: The great after-glow I expected was impeded by a ridiculous insomnia. After taking two ambiens (20mg), two klonopins (1mg), two melatonins (6mg) I could feel my body sinking and tired, but my mind was still at optimum trip-level stimulation; mushrooms made my mind an unassailable fortress, where with all these depressants in me I felt like I could easily solve a sheet of integrals. Thus, I got very little sleep. This, combined with the (circumstantial) emotional component to the trip come-down, negated any after-glow
Myself in the mirror: In the trip report, I wrote "no words..." Well I quickly got a couple pics off google and used MS Paint to try to show what I saw at one point while looking at myself in the mirror
Set{ Expecting very minor effects from such a low dose, hopefully a little mental clarity, which is what I was lacking and seeking} <-- I was in for a big surprise!
Setting{ At night, in my room for the most part}
Chronometer{
T+0.00 8:45
T+0.75 Onset and nausea (latter negated by pepto bismol)
T+1.50 Peak
T+3.00 Peaking stronger and stronger
T+3.50 It is getting more intense as it reveals some unsettling facts. I am begining to feel trapped. I'd like it to set me down now ~.~ certainty will come back in the morning, for better or worse
T+4.00 It's letting me down now
}
Mental effects{
Clearing out garbage: I just went through a do-it-yourself psychotherapy session. I recognized all the ways that my mind is incongruent with how I'd like it to be, I analyzed, I accepted what need be, and let everything go, starting afresh. Before, I had no clue how much "luggage" I was carrying around (even though I was trying to boil my mind down to simplicity, I never succeeded)
Alert: Before my trip, for a while, I haven't had much motivation, my mind has been sorta foggy, bored. This trip feels like somewhat of a re-birth. Like I just went on vacation into bliss and now I'm ready for anything. Will this hold up once I'm back to real life? Stay tuned for follow up report
I also realize certain things that I shouldn't be taking for granted, but I have been
Breathing: Breathing becomes significant, and very peaceful. Alot is going on with my breathing. I get shortness of breath sometimes at the intensity of the effects, at other times I have to take big breaths
Smiling: I laugh a little sometimes and smile sometimes. At whatever I'm thinking about (I very easily laugh right now) or at the amazing-ness of the visuals. When I smile it's like smiling for the first time...
Somato: Like a mild marijuana, I feel floaty and distorted. It is very very pleasant. This is the body buzz I've been seeking with opioids, but never reaching it. The body buzz is very intense, however, and clings forcefully
Euphoria: The euphoria is very real and full, but I can see how delicate it is. It rests on my comfort with many aspects of the trip, especially my body sensations. I can see how easily this euphoria could be turned into dysphoria and send me into a "bummer": it takes some work to keep it up
Clarity: This entire trip report is being written as I'm peaking
Summ: I consistently get the feeling that this is something to be respected, cherished, and my dosing with this drug should be spaced out over months. This doesn't feel like a drug. It feels like a key to myself
}
Visual effects{
OEV---
Patterning: Patterns are everywhere, if I let them develop. On my (completely white) floor tiles, I saw vibrant dynamic alive "ancient-looking" patterns develop. On my uniformly tan carpet, patterns of flowers and such form.
Afterimages: Everyone's familiar with this, no explanation needed. An interesting note is that this is happening with my body sense, not just visual sense. I scratch my face, and feel the scratch for up to a minute afterward
Myself in the mirror: No words...
CEV---
Like many different drugs in one. Sometimes my closed-eye vision will be one way, at other times it's like i'm on a completely different drug. The following description merely scratches the surface
Lines: Thousands of curvy lines surface, flowing, dynamic, shaded, alive, making up images and such. This particular CEV "set" is completely different than my cannabis-induced visions
Points: Points on my visual field radiate light. Sometimes I'm confused because it seems like my eyes must be half-open or something. But they're fully closed and my arms are covering my eyes so that no light penetrates
Color: Areas turn into pure color, colors merge and interact in sparkly magic-looking orgies of color
Summ: Shrooms give an earthy, organic, geometric, engaging scenery which appears "embedded" into my visual field
}
POST SCRIPT
Emotional enlightenment: While the intellectual and visual disturbances stopped at T+4, the mushrooms continued to show me important emotional content as I was laying in bed intending to sleep. At one point I had a sort of 'break-through,' crying, learning, and immediately acting on the knowledge gained.
Syncronicity: I will detail a couple examples (out of dozens). 1. This was the perfect night to try shrooms, I needed its lessons at that exact time. 2. Winamp was on shuffle, and Pink Floyd - Poles Apart played while I was laying on my bed, incidentally the song that played on shuffle while I was laying on my bed during my first psychedelic experience (first cannabis experience)
Insomnia: The great after-glow I expected was impeded by a ridiculous insomnia. After taking two ambiens (20mg), two klonopins (1mg), two melatonins (6mg) I could feel my body sinking and tired, but my mind was still at optimum trip-level stimulation; mushrooms made my mind an unassailable fortress, where with all these depressants in me I felt like I could easily solve a sheet of integrals. Thus, I got very little sleep. This, combined with the (circumstantial) emotional component to the trip come-down, negated any after-glow
Myself in the mirror: In the trip report, I wrote "no words..." Well I quickly got a couple pics off google and used MS Paint to try to show what I saw at one point while looking at myself in the mirror
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