dilated_pupils
Bluelighter
October 10th, 2006
3.7grams of shrooms
Last night I acquired some shrooms, weighed out 3.7grams and ate away.
Within 20 minutes I was already starting to come up, so I decided to go lay
down for a little while. I call a friend who is away in Florida for a week
and as she’s talking the intensity just keeps growing, more then I have ever
felt before. Eventually during the phone conversation I am not even paying
attention to what she is saying, but more so to the green drapes I am
seeing hanging from my ceiling (which I was literally seeing, I have no
'green drapes'). They floated all around the room, and with my hand I was
able to draw their forces to my hand (almost like an electric ball toy you
see at stores when you touch the little bits of electricity go to your
hand).
At this point I part from my phone conversation and the trip just gets more
intense which I couldn't even conceive possible. For literally the whole
trip I am laying on my bed unable to move. I start hearing voices, and the
tv's sounds/voices become the narrirator to my trip, and I truely believed
that the tv was not what I was hearing, but it was me creating the sounds I
was hearing. I thought this simply because everything I heard related to
me in some way, certain things were bold and loud to me which I found
strange.
At this point I am literally seeing things run across my room, I'm starting
to feel delusional. I close my eyes and my world is go, I take myself to
wherever I wish, this part of the trip gets a little hazy, but I remember
forgetting who I was and believing I was stuck inside this trip.
I feel like I'm bleeding from my finger, as I didn't realize I had a finger
in my mouth and I was biting very hard. When I looked at my hand I
couldn't even see if there was anything on it, I now start thinking to myself about how I can project myself to other places, the first example I used was going back millions of years when the dinosaurs were not extinct.
I look out the window, everything looked incredibly odd, everything
swaying, and then all of a sudden I would see headlights and a shadowy
looking car, and all these gnomes would scatter and I would hear the
scattering sound. Then the shadowy car would come from the other
direction. I couldn't believe what I was seeing; I wanted to go outside to
check this out for myself.
Well I go downstairs, and as I'm looking out the windows before I get to
the door, it looks like war of the worlds outside (it wasn't
raining/lightning or anything), I was literally seeing light everywhere and it was only 2:00am something. I ended up not going outside, I don't know
if it was because fear, but I just didn't go out.
And then...
Some how I get on the topic of life/death and God in my head. I go through
several phases at this point, although I don't exactly remember which order
they go in. At one point I was in heaven visiting all my family, and then
it turned into "Wait, there is no God." I literally came to the conclusion
that I was stuck in the particular moment in time I was in, and that I was
'my' entity for that moment and I was stuck there forever. I then some how
rationalized that my thoughts are what keep me 'alive' however I started
thinking I wasn't even alive. I got in a mind loop as to how my thoughts
come from God, and God's thoughts keep him real, but they are all just
thoughts and somehow this meant that there was no God, no people, no
nothing and that I was just a figment.
At some points I was in third person and the 'world' was my little toy I
guess we can say in which I was in control of. Imagine it though, we live
here in this world, when in reality, maybe some larger then imaginable
being is holding us in a room? It sounds stupid now but made more sense
while tripping.
So now I am stuck thinking I am dead and I know I need to see a person to
feel like everything’s okay, but I didn't know what to do or really where I
was.
I wanted to find the meaning of life; I truly believe it would make me
normal again. I sifted through ideas, maybe it's love? So I thought about
my girlfriend, that helped a little but I couldn't remember anything about
her except what she looked like, not even having sex a few hours priors to
taking the shrooms could I remember. I then thought that maybe being sober
is the real life, and that by me tripping I went against what God has meant
for us, but I quickly realized that it was not that. There had to be a way
for me to figure out the meaning of life, and I believe I came up with
something but I can't remember unfortunately.
I can't remember much as I ended up falling asleep after some time because
I really was not able to remember what I had done that day prior to taking
the shrooms, nor who I was and I just wanted to sleep, although I was
freaking myself out thinking maybe I am sleeping, in fact at one point I
made myself believe I was lucid dreaming.
Anyway, overall this experience has changed me a lot, and I am going to be
tripping again real soon to hopefully further this experience.
3.7grams of shrooms
Last night I acquired some shrooms, weighed out 3.7grams and ate away.
Within 20 minutes I was already starting to come up, so I decided to go lay
down for a little while. I call a friend who is away in Florida for a week
and as she’s talking the intensity just keeps growing, more then I have ever
felt before. Eventually during the phone conversation I am not even paying
attention to what she is saying, but more so to the green drapes I am
seeing hanging from my ceiling (which I was literally seeing, I have no
'green drapes'). They floated all around the room, and with my hand I was
able to draw their forces to my hand (almost like an electric ball toy you
see at stores when you touch the little bits of electricity go to your
hand).
At this point I part from my phone conversation and the trip just gets more
intense which I couldn't even conceive possible. For literally the whole
trip I am laying on my bed unable to move. I start hearing voices, and the
tv's sounds/voices become the narrirator to my trip, and I truely believed
that the tv was not what I was hearing, but it was me creating the sounds I
was hearing. I thought this simply because everything I heard related to
me in some way, certain things were bold and loud to me which I found
strange.
At this point I am literally seeing things run across my room, I'm starting
to feel delusional. I close my eyes and my world is go, I take myself to
wherever I wish, this part of the trip gets a little hazy, but I remember
forgetting who I was and believing I was stuck inside this trip.
I feel like I'm bleeding from my finger, as I didn't realize I had a finger
in my mouth and I was biting very hard. When I looked at my hand I
couldn't even see if there was anything on it, I now start thinking to myself about how I can project myself to other places, the first example I used was going back millions of years when the dinosaurs were not extinct.
I look out the window, everything looked incredibly odd, everything
swaying, and then all of a sudden I would see headlights and a shadowy
looking car, and all these gnomes would scatter and I would hear the
scattering sound. Then the shadowy car would come from the other
direction. I couldn't believe what I was seeing; I wanted to go outside to
check this out for myself.
Well I go downstairs, and as I'm looking out the windows before I get to
the door, it looks like war of the worlds outside (it wasn't
raining/lightning or anything), I was literally seeing light everywhere and it was only 2:00am something. I ended up not going outside, I don't know
if it was because fear, but I just didn't go out.
And then...
Some how I get on the topic of life/death and God in my head. I go through
several phases at this point, although I don't exactly remember which order
they go in. At one point I was in heaven visiting all my family, and then
it turned into "Wait, there is no God." I literally came to the conclusion
that I was stuck in the particular moment in time I was in, and that I was
'my' entity for that moment and I was stuck there forever. I then some how
rationalized that my thoughts are what keep me 'alive' however I started
thinking I wasn't even alive. I got in a mind loop as to how my thoughts
come from God, and God's thoughts keep him real, but they are all just
thoughts and somehow this meant that there was no God, no people, no
nothing and that I was just a figment.
At some points I was in third person and the 'world' was my little toy I
guess we can say in which I was in control of. Imagine it though, we live
here in this world, when in reality, maybe some larger then imaginable
being is holding us in a room? It sounds stupid now but made more sense
while tripping.
So now I am stuck thinking I am dead and I know I need to see a person to
feel like everything’s okay, but I didn't know what to do or really where I
was.
I wanted to find the meaning of life; I truly believe it would make me
normal again. I sifted through ideas, maybe it's love? So I thought about
my girlfriend, that helped a little but I couldn't remember anything about
her except what she looked like, not even having sex a few hours priors to
taking the shrooms could I remember. I then thought that maybe being sober
is the real life, and that by me tripping I went against what God has meant
for us, but I quickly realized that it was not that. There had to be a way
for me to figure out the meaning of life, and I believe I came up with
something but I can't remember unfortunately.
I can't remember much as I ended up falling asleep after some time because
I really was not able to remember what I had done that day prior to taking
the shrooms, nor who I was and I just wanted to sleep, although I was
freaking myself out thinking maybe I am sleeping, in fact at one point I
made myself believe I was lucid dreaming.
Anyway, overall this experience has changed me a lot, and I am going to be
tripping again real soon to hopefully further this experience.
