hello hello!!!!
so i moved out of albuquerque because well...that city is just riddled with drugs, crime, and unemployment!!!
so here i am in phoenix, doing much better. i have a job and i got on methadone [im on 125mg], im not homeless, and i have $$$ in my bank account.
not spending all my $$$ on drugs anymore.
but fuck...its still a struggle. i have been having intense cravings for drugs lately. sometimes i really miss h and the needle. its hard. i havent been to any meetings out here yet. i have no friends here either.
maybe i thought that moving away, i could move away from all my drug problems...?
didn't work that way. at all.
i've been drinking more and smoking more green lately too.
my depression and anxiety get so bad sometimes that i feel like i'm literally going crazy.
not sure what to do sometimes. i just get up every morning, go to the methadone clinic, and go to work. thats my life now. its almost like i can feel a relapse coming. good thing i dont know anyone here, right? but i cant keep isolating like this. i need to go out and live...sober...how do i do this tho?!!? haha.
