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Most stupid/funniest thing done while high?

The dumbest thing ive ever done was probly last year when me and my buddy got our hands on some shrooms ate them about 2 hours later started trippin went to a party where we drank some whiskey and smoked some bud then got the munchies so ended up doing 115 MPH down the highway to the gas station
 
stonedpimp420 said:
The dumbest thing ive ever done was probly last year when me and my buddy got our hands on some shrooms ate them about 2 hours later started trippin went to a party where we drank some whiskey and smoked some bud then got the munchies so ended up doing 115 MPH down the highway to the gas station
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wtf...thats just irresponsible
 
Wow, I couldn't even begin to answer that question. There's just so many stupid things, and I'm really stoned so it's hard to remember them well, or tell which is more stupider
 
So one time I was in jail and it was Saturday afternoon. We were in a really oldschool jail - they were building a replacement that went into effect just a year later. It was one of the last ones in the country where you could smoke cigarettes... buy them on commissary, get free books of matches from the CO's. They also had an odd policy you won't see very often in a jail - twice a month we could have a package sent to us full of food and stationary. Every other Saturday they'd take all the packages into our cell block and give them to us.

Like on every Saturday, I had plenty of kindbud I had brought in from work release. As a special treat, the guy who only had to come in on weekends for his DUI brought in a stack of Klonopins. I got really high and he gave me a couple pins and I passed out after opening my box and taking inventory to prevent theft.

At some point I woke up from my nap in a benzo haze and I went over to this other kid's bunk, rifled through his package, found his white cheddar Cheez-Its, and opened 'em up. I'm not sure where he was. I proceeded to eat the entire fuckin' box of Cheez-Its, smashing them all over my face and clothes so my hands and face were covered in a greasy coating of white cheddar and cracker crumbs, and so were his sheets and blankets and pillow. I then passed out in his bed drooling.

I woke up to, "Coolio! Man what the hell are you doing?!" with the kid hovering over his bed. I bolted up so quick, and as soon as my feet hit the floor I ran full speed ahead down the cell block towards another bunk (I think it just so happened to be mine). I didn't stop until I smacked into the wall and knocked myself out into my own bed.

I don't think I've ever been so disrespectful in jail before, but I think he understood it was just the drugs.
 
ActiveA said:
I've got some good ones...


Me and a friend got really high off about a gram each of amazing weed, like our eyes were bleeding kind of thing. Anyway we were hungry and walked into Coles and tried to steal 2 huge Salamis and disguise them as our "massive dongs" when the staff asked us. We would've gotten away with it until my friends Salami fell down. They realized we were stoned and let us off though...
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Ahahahahahahaha. I fucking lol'd so hard. "Nah man, it's just my huge wang. Seriously, I'll show it to you if you want." As funny as that is, you shouldn't have been stealing salami in the first place. Fucking epic.
 
Haha the funniest shit I have ever done high was: So my friend is pissing in front of his car while his car is still on he looked at us all smiling and pissing away, (my other buddy is chilling in the backseat) I proceeded to get in the driver seat (mind you he's still pissing) I put the car in drive and creep up to my friend who's still pissing, lightly tapped his ass with the car and he starts peeing up onto his jacket. Me and my friend in the car were in tears with his reaction.
 
I remember it was my first time getting stoned before school, and this was back when I first started so I was mega baked. I casually look out the window and I see a dead deer in someone's yard. A buck, it was at least a six point.
 
man, i'm waaaay less stupid when i'm stoned now that i've been a daily smoker.. but like, when my bf and i first got together i hadn't smoked in ages and ages, so i'd get super crazy baked... one time we were walking home from picking up indian food takeout, and i was walking on the little island of grass/clover between the side walk and the street... and for some reason it looked to me like tons of tiny little trees, like i was a giant walking on this island of trees. so i got on my hands and knees and was like.. feeling the grass or something, because.. i don't know, it just seemed so awesome. my bf was like.. wtf? and i was too incoherent to even explain what i was doing down there.. fondling the clover in someone's front yard. lmfao.
 
Driving to a party, baked and with another joint in the car, I flashed my highbeams at a cop while trying to put on the turn signal to exit the highway. Dude came across about 3 lanes of busy highway, but not before I could take the exit, thankfully. That would have sucked.
 
So yesterday night I was with a few good friends at their apartment, which I had never been to. It was all chill, we relaxed with a couple blunts and some good laughs. When I decided it was about time to head home I was faced with a minor problem. The tenants of the apartment were quite paranoid and always kept their door locked three different ways, deadbolt, chain lock, and another lock system which was similar to the chain lock, but located at the top of the door. I had unlocked the deadbolt and the chain lock, neglecting to notice the other lock at the top of the door. When I opened the door, it stopped after it was open about 6 inches and did not go any farther. I was highly bamboozled by this and I kept re-opening the door with no luck at opening it all the way. After a few minutes of the most confused time of my life, one of my friends helped me out with shutting the door and unlocking the last lock. I felt like an idiot and laughed the whole way home.
 
One time we were cruising in my car and I was driving and for some reason I turned into a court house with one of my friends, who was one of his first times smoking, and realized their was a bunch of cop cars. I quickly did a u turn and got the fuck out of their. At the moment it was panic but to this day I still laugh my ass off about how my friend freaked the fuck out.

FM
 
I have a new one!

Me and two homies ate firecrackers, two of use ate very high dose crackers. After about an hour and a half I was high as FUCK. We were driving to Sonics (the driver didn't eat a high dose no worries) to get some food and we were about to pass a Cabelas (huge ass sporting goods/ outdoor store w/ a cafe and shit). One of my friends starts talking about how he got to eat bear meat one time. For some reason the idea of my friend eating fucking bear meat was absolutely profound to me, and my stoned ass decided that the goal of the night was to go on a cannabis adventure to buy bear meat at Cabelas! It reminded me of the cliche stoner movie thing, with the ridiculous side tracking. So me and my two homies were laughing and discussing how cool it would be to do that. Before long I was dead set on doing this, I was so damn excited.

I point out to the driver that we missed the exit to get to Cabelas, he replys "ok?".
"Duh, thats were the bear meats at"
"No, you fool! We were never gonna get bear!" in a ridiculously stern voice, sounded like a teenage Sean Connery

I erupted in laughter, I don't believe I've been pwned so hard in years.

/obligatory 'you had to be there'
 
at the beach a month ago, was walking down a ramp when i noticed a silhouette on the side of a sand dune about 10 metres away. it was night and i could hardly see shit, but it looked as if it was movin. as i slowly walked closer, keeping my eye on it, it looked as if it was a person or creature slowly crawling sideways on the dune, facing me.
i was scared as shit, obviously, and when i finally got the courage to check it out, it turned out to be two wooden poles sticking out the dune with a banner tied to each. the slight breeze was making the banner move a bit.
that took 15 minutes of my life.
 
i have to that come to mind right away
ill start with the one that was just funny to me after it happened
i was smokin A LOT over at a buddys place and i had just gotten a new phone not quite sure how to use it 100% some how i end up calling my ex's sister and didnt know it phone was left on table and we were talking about my ex my frineds are all still friends with her at the time we had just broken up and i was pissed at some shit she had done but told her i was not mad ended up talking mad shit about her and every one was laughin due to being so fried
she found out and well i think every one can guess what happened

now the second one
was leaving the same friends house a diffrent time a few days after having a run in with the cops...some how they found out the name every one calls me after some damn kids blame some shit on me and give them my name (diff storry not for this thred)
anyways im ripped off my ass and get the munchies on my way home i stop at the gas station park my truck and go inside im lookin around for some drink end up lookin over the drinks for a good 5 mins not sure what looks good so i grab 3 or 4 bottles of random stuff some soda milk juice what ever
now im going to need some snack and no i have no idea what i want...i get some chips a candy bar some beef jerky and a pizza
when im looking at the pizzas i here "so hows your night going batman?"
i turn as i say "not to fuckin bad how about....yours..e..l..ff" seeing who it was i start to freak out in my mind that well now im fucked it was 3 cops that just walked in
so i grab a pizza walk up to the counter get my shit paid for and as im leavin i feel the cops just watchin me i hear "you drive safe now"
im thinking if i get out of this with just "you drive safe now" i am the most lucky guy on earth
i go to my truck and light up a smoke thinking do i go or not i said well fuck it im gone took off as fast as i could and didnt look back
i made it home but never went to that gas station when high agein
 
Hahahaha oh shit these made my day. I got a couple so here they are.
First one. So my buddy and I are sitting in a little kid’s playhouse thing just smoking bowl after bowl hit after hit. So after about 45 mins of straight blazing we decide to go inside and watch some TV. I go into the kitchen to get a drink of water and opened the door from the kitchen to the garage; water jug was in the garage. So I hear this sound that’s fairly loud and I am standing in the doorway baffled with the most confused look on my face. I stood there for literally 20 mins thinking there was this opossum stuck underneath my friends car and it was screeching and making all these noises like it was about to die. I thought to myself, "Should I help it or just leave?" After walking about three more feet into the garage I noticed the dryer was on. Boy I haven't felt that stupid to this day.

Another time a few of my friends and I were blazing out in my buddy’s backyard out of this new bong we just purchased. (A little one but we didn’t care.) So we take a break and were just sitting there talking and laughing and all of a sudden we hear glass break. My friend, who was holding the bong between his legs, looked at me and said, "WTF, did you break a glass?" I looked at him and told him that the bong had slipped between his legs and we just looked at each other and started laughing our asses off. So we put the remains in a brown paper bag, and when it was time to leave we brought it with us to throw away. We walked home and set the bag near a tree somewhere along the way. So the time that elapsed between there and getting to my house was spent thinking, "what if a little kid finds that, cuts himself, gets a serious infection, gets hospitalized and the police find us with fingerprinting!?!” I then looked at my friend and said, “We have to go back and get that bong!” So we end up running a block away, find the bong and threw it into the nursery in between our neighborhoods. Hahaha good times.
 
lol to the dryer one

smoked during lunch, and went to take a chemistry test the next hour, I spent about half an hour just staring at the sheet before I realized where I was and rushed the thing in about 10 minutes, (Ibelieve that this falls into the stupid category)

luckily the teacher instituted a mad curve because nobody understood it (or were just all stoned as well) and I got an A



my other story is in the same class, I was completely nauseated from smoking and I felt the urge to throw up sitting in about the middle of the class during a lecture, I didn't feel comfortable talking to the teacher so I just sat there, well eventually I actually did throw up. Not a huge amount but enough to make people wonder if I hadn't faked taking my sweater off just in time to bring it up over my mouth and hide it, I ran to the bathroom and tossed it at the next opportunity

though I lost a nice sweater in the process :P
 
Me and my best friend from back home both go to school in DC and we both started blazing together in High School. Well we moved into this apartment building together with the laundry machines down in the basement. We moved in with about an ounce of really good weed from back home in GA and proceeded to get extremely stoned. We then went down to do some laundry.

The way our laundry room is set up is that there are two rows of washers(back to back in the middle and the dryers are all stacked one on top of each other and they line the walls. Well on one side of the washers the first three to the right are top load and the other 2 on the left side are front load washers. In our retarded state we move our loads out of the top load washers into the front load ones thinking they are dryers. And during this whole laundry session we are just going back to the room and listening to muisc/playing halo/blazing.

Well we go down to grab the dry cloths, however they are soaking wet still. So we just put in $1.25 more and put them on a second cycle. We were confused but still thought one more round would do the trick. So we put in more money and waited another 30 minutes. When we come down again to find our clothes are still wet we realize something is not right. Finally we realized that we had just washed our clothes three times in a row.

It was probably the stupidest thing I have ever done to this day while high.

The only other story that could even be compared is when I was talking with my friend (same guy from the last story) and was trying to cook this spinach and artichoke dip from fridays ( the one that comes in the freezer). So I have my cell phone pressed between my shoulder blade and my ear and im trying to unwrap the plastic off the top and get this in the microwave. I end up have a pretty tough time so i place the dip into the microwave....put my cell phone down next to it....rip off the plastic sheet and then shut the microwave door. Set it to 3 minutes and walked away. I completely forgot that I was just having a conversation with someone. Then my mom runs in like 2 and half minutes later and was like the microwaves making funny noises...what did you do. I opened it up to find my phones lcd display absolutely fucked/melted and the phone has sort of melted( it was a flip phone so i couldn't even open it because it had melted). Almost couldnt get my sim card out but finally did.

Definitely the two dumbest things i have ever done stoned. And my dad was just laughing at me when he found out about the phone. (Hes a stoner too)%)
 
Once a buddy of mine and I spent about 20 minutes hiding from nothing in an alley. And the kicker was we were talking loudly and laughing about all the funny things that could come get us, so if there was actually something to hide from they/it could have found us super easy.

Also, i was going for a midnight walkabout with some tunes, on a real low traffic road and i walked past a bush. The outline of the bush against the night sky, for an instant, looked like some fearsome sasquach with it's fist raised. I yelled and ran away from it and seconds later realized what a dick i was...
 
I do this thing when I'm nice and high and friends and I are out and about.

I pull up or walk up.. depending the circumstances.. its MUCH better if the person is on a cell phone, otherwise it wont be as funny.

I go up to them.. and in the other thread I mentioned me speaking in a British accent when buzzed.

Well, I go up to the man on the phone.. and it has to be done to the same sex.. and hopefully on the phone.

I go up to the person and say...

Excuse me..

Then he says hold on to the person on the phone...

I say.. Would you like to join us for a gang-bang?...

The reactions are priceless!! THEN they have to sit there an explain to the person they are talking to on the phone that some guy just asked him to join in on a gang-bang.

Its SUCH a fun thing to do.. can really freak some people out and have fun.

But be prepared for that rare.. Hell yea! LOL
 
As my name suggests, I rarely smoke weed or pop benzos independently, so I'm going to answer the question in that state of mind.

Stupidest: Got into a fight with someone on school property and there may or may not have been a knife involved in my favor. Got led out of school in a cop car. Meanwhile, I'm giggling and smiling as they're cuffing, fingerprinting, and mugshotting me in the police station. I realized where I was when I woke up on a slab of metal they called a "bed". Jesus, that was stupid.

Funniest: So many memories... I can't really recall the funniest thing I've done when high, because I'm usually toeing the line to blacking out, but the funniest thing I remember recently is when I saw a video of a crippled guy getting hit by a bus.
 
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