SpellmanT7
Bluelighter
It was only getting better as it was getting bigger.
I was there but I wanted more...I could handle more, I could?
I should.
The images on the screen brought me in. I felt the words, the situation seemed perfect.
More followed, still not at excess...in relative terms.
It didn't feel comfortable anymore. I took remedial action.
So yes, I was too far from ideal but had salvaged and worked with this before.
I still wanted to ride, so that I could chalk up another 24hrs in the worthy column.
You were only meant to smooth the edges. Only ever intended to halt progression but leave me at that point.
Why did you do it to me? Where did your strength come from?
Another day of note, another building block and now I watched them crumble, questioning whether they'd ever existed.
More remedial action... why am I doing this? You fuck me and then bring me round to negativity and emotional landslides. Why am I coming back to you?
I wasn't deep enough in the water to deserve this. Why are you hurting me? This has never happened before.
You want to destroy what I had. You want to become your soulless alternative that I hate and no longer call upon.
I don't stop...I continue to remedy this and you level my mountain with a sickening desire to cause me pain.
Anxiety, from that - from you, whom had only ever brought relief and relaxation before.
How can I look at you again after what you've chosen to inflict upon me?
Colour moved through to monochrome, monochrome became black.
I was there but I wanted more...I could handle more, I could?
I should.
The images on the screen brought me in. I felt the words, the situation seemed perfect.
More followed, still not at excess...in relative terms.
It didn't feel comfortable anymore. I took remedial action.
So yes, I was too far from ideal but had salvaged and worked with this before.
I still wanted to ride, so that I could chalk up another 24hrs in the worthy column.
You were only meant to smooth the edges. Only ever intended to halt progression but leave me at that point.
Why did you do it to me? Where did your strength come from?
Another day of note, another building block and now I watched them crumble, questioning whether they'd ever existed.
More remedial action... why am I doing this? You fuck me and then bring me round to negativity and emotional landslides. Why am I coming back to you?
I wasn't deep enough in the water to deserve this. Why are you hurting me? This has never happened before.
You want to destroy what I had. You want to become your soulless alternative that I hate and no longer call upon.
I don't stop...I continue to remedy this and you level my mountain with a sickening desire to cause me pain.
Anxiety, from that - from you, whom had only ever brought relief and relaxation before.
How can I look at you again after what you've chosen to inflict upon me?
Colour moved through to monochrome, monochrome became black.
