Modern Cafe Thoughts

[empty_remains]

Is it always like this? Long nights turning into longer days. We drag ourselves through work, drink cup after cup of Starbucks coffee. Savor the bitter taste. To only pull yourself home night after night to an empty apartment, nothing but the T.V. to meet you. Sit down at your glass table, eating your boxed dinner and wonder why your life had to take this wrong turn and land you here. Remember when you were younger, surely you had dreams. Perhaps you wanted to be a doctor, a teacher anything you wished you thought would be true.
My time will come. Chanting it over and again while you brush your teeth hasn't helped so far. Gaining and losing weight rapidly to draw men's attention to you. Somehow you never fail to frighten them off simply by opening up. Seems sad to lose everything you could love by being yourself. Paint a prettier picture and try again. Keep it up and you'll forget about only having a T.V. to come home to. Crack the paint and watch as it all falls away. Will it always belike this? Depressing days turning into worse nights. Sometimes suicide seems better than another layer of paint. In the end one will always crack.
Will it always be like this? Like this? The pain and emptiness that never seems to go away.
Long nights, longer days. Just add coffee.




*Just found this, I wrote it on 8/4/03. Made me think back on alot of shit...*

 

[Mehm]

very interesting. i like how straight forward you present your thoughts. hopefully your personal relationships has worked out for the better

 

[lostNfound]

The romance of sadness and living in a grey world is like an abusive relationship.
I hope you got of that place or didn't stay too long, it's no fun there.
For some reason the whole reminded me of the slogan, sad music makes me happy. In my case, that slogan rings true most of the time.
Thanks for sharing.

 

[empty_remains]

I've heard that before, "sad music makes me happy. " It's true for me to I was always attracted to things, people that I thought I could fix. I'm trying my life a bit differently now and this time I'm happy for the right reasons. I personally was one of those people who was always sure no one changes. But I'd want to help anyway. Now I'm starting to think that I was just picking the completely wrong people to be in my life.