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miserable

chloe_childs

Greenlighter
Joined
Apr 10, 2012
Messages
7
I guess I'm just looking for some advice and/or support. I am a sophomore student in college and I attend a university. I intend to move back to my home town after this term. I'm just super depressed and confused and struggling in life. I really like one of my guy friends so so so much. I wouldnt go as far as to say I'm in love with him but I know I could be and he just decided on saturday that he likes another girl.. he has no idea how I feel. Should I be satisfied being friends or should I pursue him? My heart hurts just thinking about him he's so perfect. And even as I'm reading this I know how pathetic I sound. This is so out of character for me.. I've also been experimenting with drugs lately with my group of friends and I feel like a hypocrite because of my religion but you're only young once right? I could go on but I think this is long and I'm not sure if anyone will reply. If you have any advice or similar experiences let me know!

:?:?:?:?:?:?:?:?

Chloe
 
Just stay friends for now. As soon as that other girl is out of the picture, POUNCE!!!!!!
 
^Yeah. Just be there for him through it. Odds are that he's not gonna marry that chick. It might suck waiting and seeing all that shit second-hand, but if he's really worth the wait it'll bring you guys closer in the end. Be a mate. He might like you as such too and just not had the nerve to bring it up because he's scared it'll make things awkward if you don't have the same feelings. Been down that road... Stay smart with the drugs too, but I'm sure you get that. All the best :)
 
Also, what's stopping you from spilling to your friend now? I mean, he's not in anything serious yet with this chick is he?
 
even if he is (serious), i dont believe its a crime to admit one has an attraction and admiration for another human being. if the recipient has an issue with such a proclamation, he/she was hardly worth receiving it and you can move on having discovered such.
 
no nothing serious at all. they just hungout for the first time with mutual friends on saturday. and she has a boyfriend who is long distance but cheated on her so i think she'll break up with him :( the thing is she is really nice and i like her as a friend too but i just want him so badly!!! he's perfect. and we get along so well.. im afraid to tell him anything because im not sure he feels the way i do at all and now that she is introduced to the picture he probably put me to the side even more :///// and i would never want to make our friendship awkward because id rather have him as a friend.. even if its hard.. then nothing at all.. because just being around him is great... gahhhhhhh im such a hopeless romantic lol
 
you need to make it obvious that you like him. if he's into you it will sow discontent with this new girl. leave it and they may become much closer than at present. get some guts and tell him you like him
 
Yeah, i agree let him know somehow the way you feel. as for depression: Start exercising (or more often), eat well, and get on a good sleep regimen. If that doesnt work and you want to go down the road of medication IME ssri's seem to work a little, but kratom does better fpr me, although you risk a dependance on it. The benefits have always outweighed the negatives (not many, minor constipation, and when upping dose you get some urine retention. Best of luck to you. PM me if you have any questions.
 
yea ive recently started exercising consistently.. running in particular and eating cleaner.. ive lost 12 pounds since january and only want to lose a few more for shasta in 4 weeks (: which he is going to be on that trip! i was thinking i may be gutsy like you guys said and use that 4 day vaca to tell him im attracted to him and see what he says... WHO KNOWS! but i do want to go on anti depressants i just have a difficult time getting to a counselor and getting diagnosed/etc.
 
I hear ya, although are you thinking about waiting 4 weeks to tell him? because you dont want him getting too attached to the other girl...
 
you might want to realize that he is not perfect. no one is perfect and putting him on a pedestal like that probably isn't healthy. it's normal to struggle at uni, please think long and hard before dropping out (or are you just planning a break?). as for the drug guilt, would you have sex with this guy? cuz that's probably against your religion too. have you ever thought about atheism?
 
Awww, chloe. I'm so sorry, girlfriend. What a hard thing to experience! Don't let this guy ruin you and your future. He might seem perfect, but ya know, he has his issues too. ;) Everyone does. You're not quitting college because of him, are you? That would be a huge mistake, because in a year or two when you're over it, think about how badly you'll be kicking yourself for allowing someone to do that to you.

Think of it this way, have you been in love or crazy over a guy? Are you still crazy about him now? No. How would you feel if you ruined your life over the last guy you were crazy about? Wouldn't you feel dumb now over it, since you're over him now? In a year or two, if things don't work out with this guy, you'll no longer feel depressed over all of this, and at the end of the day, you have to do what is best to better yourself. Don't let this depression ruin you. I know it's really hard to see it when you're in love and depressed over lost love, but you reeeeeally reaaaaaly will meet someone new and have these same feelings and he will reciprocate. I promise you.
 
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