mild mdma anxiety and dont enjoy weed these days, bad idea to try acid?

[jon6123]

so i dont enjoy getting stoned anymore, when i smoke i tend to just recluse into myself and not talk and over think about how much im not enjoying getting stoned and wondering if im gonna whiety, ive been like this for the past year.

Ive taken a fair bit of mdma over the past 5 months too (loved it) which has brought me through some weird anxiety/depression waves and things within these past 3 weeks, which has drawn me to the conclusion that i should take 3 months off drugs (and only take mdma every 2 -3 months from then)

the anxiety waves can make me drastically change my view on things that im thinking about, well tbh the feelings revolve soley around drugs, one minute im thinking i wont take mdma for 6 months, and an hour later im thinking itll be fine to do it in a month or two.

these waves also affect my views on acid, theres a chance that i might have the opportunity to drop acid in september which is after my 3 month break, and while im still interested in drug experiences and i dont want to miss this opportunity i also really dont want to have a bad trip (obviously) im quite sure that if i was to drop acid when im feeling anxious and worried i would want to gain control of my mind to think things through and freak out because its running off on one. I have also read stories that peoples reaction to acid can vary from just feeling really stoned to full blown trips, and the idea of feeling really stoned scares me nowadays :/

people always say that you have to be 100% sure of yourself to properly prevent yourself from a bad trip but i know that (at this point in time) my state of mind can change within an hour.

my friend who is very well experienced on drugs says that i should try 2CB for a lighter peek into the world of psychedelics.

so would what do you think? anybody have any past experiences? or a plan of action? i dont want to miss out on acid but i will turn it down if i have any hint of doubt.

a few more facts about me that might help:

1.My mum is schizophrenic (mild) i believe am very stable but always assessing myself due to doctors telling me im predisposed to psychosis
2.I sometimes have 30 second freak outs at the peak of mdma
3.I dont experience any visuals from mdma at all, not even colours standing out (apart from once when i took a large amount and got closed eye patterns)
4.I fucking love mdma

thanks for reading!

 

[maxxsskip]

I wouldn't dose if I were predisposed to psychosis..but if you have to, dose low. A first strong acid trip mixed with anxiety can be very intense.

 

[jon6123]

right, well i actually find it very hard to remember the freak outs and what im thinking about at the time, i think i start repeatedly closing my eyes which makes me worry a little, then i feel rushes up my spine that feel cold behind my neck and teeth and i start to not like that feeling and my mind starts to race but i cant remember what it races about, i think its just about having a bad experience.. i think im worried im going to "whitey" cause my heart racing and my reapeating thoughts are similar to when im stoned

but then i learnt to "feel" the sensations like the cold teeth and stuff and remembered that from past experiences that it goes away, i get some air, try and enjoy the cold back feeling and then im fine, this usually lasting about 1 - 2 minutes.

i think i have, in some part, a small complex about drugs.. probably relating to my mum and the drugs shes on/the way she is. i guess some would say its a bad idea for me to dose but i think all of that with my mum is what fuels my curiosity into acid, and the hope that if i can enjoy such an experience and open my mind i might be able to come to a conclusion about my own mental state of mind, and free myself from this worry.

can anyone go into more detail about the similarities of stoned and lsd? i know theres probably not much between them but i need to ask..

and also thoughts on 2CB

thanks for your answers, maxxsskip my plan was to only half a tab, and see how that feels. derekseyes you fill me with a little more confidence but please talk about your views on these freak outs i have

thanks

 

[ParappaTheRapper]

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[Pinging brah]

Im the exact same, i abused weed for years, smoked everyday which so many people on here preach like its a healthy and safe thing to do. I stopped due to anxiety, parranoia and got very anti social. Now when ever i smoke i suffer severe parranoia to the point i think my best friends are talking and plotting against me.
But MDMA, the complete opposite which is why i love it.
My mother also being a Parranoid schizophrenic.
I'd really like to try psychedelics as well, possibly mescaline for my first.

 

[HeavyHanded]

I honestly hate to say it, but I would not try it if I were in your shoes. The risk of bringing a permanent and life altering psychosis up from somewhere that it's best left buried is too big. As excellent as LSD can be, it is not worth trying it to come out the other side a different and mentally unstable/unhealthy person for the rest of your life, imo.