apockalupsis
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Aug 12, 2009
- Messages
- 11
My first trip report! Unusual in that it starts with a more utilitarian approach to drugs and concludes pretty recreationally. Not your run of the mill 'woo party i took all the drugs' scenario so I thought it may contribute to the body of knowledge on instrumental, study-oriented, and non 'excessive' scenarios of stimulant drugs - which at the same time aren't just, 'I took my pills today as the doctor prescribed and I feel x." I also enjoy doing this (the drugs themselves and writing the report) as part of my own research - research into myself, research into the ways that sites like this give rise to communities of self-experimentation in psychotropic substances.
So, to begin. Today I happened upon some generic methylphenidate ERs and clonazepams. A little birdy brought them to my window, and after she went through a rigorous examination ultimately diagnosed me with condition x that, like totally justified stuff I proceeded with my bioassay.
You see, I don't have any real diagnosis of anything and I contest the whole illness model and the clinicization of cognitive functioning and prescription psychotropic drugs. These are to support a period of enhanced cognitive functioning in preparation for a significant examination. But oh no, that's outside the limited sphere of psychiatric rationality these days, so I'd have to claim (falsely in my view) to have a disease to get the damn things... though quite material to my own academic research that's all beside the point. I obtained my substances from Dr. Bluebird, and his colleague Dr. Greenbird, and immediately took two of the methylphenidates with the intention of facilitating some studying over the course of the day. Previously in the day i'd smoked some quite fantastic pot, but by that point (2pm EST: t=0) it had worn out a bit.
t:-0:05. I eat a hamburger. Bacon, cheese, mayonnaise, barbecue sauce. It is tasty. I have heard of the anorectic effects of MPH, and though I have not experienced them much I did not wish to be starving and gutrotty hours later having had no desire to eat.
t:0. Consumption of pills. 2 generic 18mg methylphenidate ERs, marking 'Z' on one hand and '18' on the other.
t:0:10. I vaporize a bag of same high-quality marijuana. It gets me quite stoned. My rationale is I'd been feeling a bit anxious about taking stims, and trying to do productive work, so I'd give myself a dose of some familiar flavours to soften the blow. I don't get anxious with pot generally, and this is a strong indica that really chills me out. I pull out a book about the cultural function of PET scan images and start to work through it, taking notes on my iPad. I am distracted by the fact that I stopped watching an episode of Breaking Bad to eat aforementioned hamburger, and to check the mail. I finish watching the episode.
t:0:30. I'm moderately stoned still. Back to reading the PET scan book. I don't have much trouble studying when I am straight up baked. Though probably if I'd smoked more than one bag, I would have been more stoned still, and more unable to focus on book. A bag from my vape consists of roughly a .15-.2gram bowl which takes a good 10 minutes to suck back, so it draws out the stone a much longer time if you take multiple bowls. you can be literally in process of consuming weed for upwards of 40 minutes. then you are so stoned you become quite unsure of what to do and forget what you meant to accomplish in the midst of statements and/or tasks. (i digress, I'm in that state just now as I write.)
t:1:00. The methylphenidate clarity has broken through the lingering pot fuzz. I get a bit twitchy at first and trepidacious since this is only my third time taking this drug, second time orally. but I loosen up after a few minutes and focus on the book. I find myself proceeding through it quickly, but sometimes getting hung up on passages and quickly rereading them several times before I could gather their meanings. sometimes the passages were themselves hard to follow and needing the reread, but other times it seemed like I was just getting needlessly confused.
t:2:00. I've done pretty well on this book. Gotten to the conclusion when a friend comes by, we'd planned to discuss this PET scan book and a few others. So we have a drink of water and after basic chitchat get down to discussing these materials. We talk for a few hours - sometimes I feel a bit more articulate or less articulate than usual, sometimes I feel quite wide awake and clear, other times I get to yawning a bit. A good productive discussion, although I didn't take much in the way of notes and I am not 100% sure how much of it will linger in the ol' memory banks given the rest of the story. He will send me his own notes on some works though so useful additional sources of information are gained.
t:4:00. Girlfriend is home. I say hi, friend and I finish off our discussion and he heads off. I didn't mention to friend that I was on some Ritalin at the time, nor girlfriend, and neither noticed anything amiss. No big deal if I were to tell them, but there would be an intrigued discussion and I didn't want to get into it just then. Also wanted to see how well I could 'pass' as not on psychotropic drugs - obviously just fine, given that these dosages are commonly given to kids with the idea that it just makes them function 'normally.' (A wacky notion I think but again beside the point.) I spend some time alternating between chatting with girlfriend, we eat some dinner, then I read some more. no real anorectic effects, but a little heartburn which is rare for me. I focus reasonably well on some reading for a bit, but the TV comes on and though I keep on reading I do periodically get distracted by TV. like most 'ADD drugs' I find the Ritalin has more of a stimulant effect than any kind of magic 'focus' power - if you're the kind of person who when stimulated gets super into something and stays on task, and the problem is just you're not properly stimulated in the brain, then it'll do it for you, but otherwise you're just more stimulated version of your attention-hopping self. Or...maybe that has something to do with the weed. Whatever, I still do OK hopping my attention around, and if I can hop faster that is a bonus.
t:4:30. I vape a couple more bags of weed, and most definitely feeling a weird synchronic effect that affirms the methylphenidate is doing its thing. this doesn't quite describe it but in a way the effects of my strong indica pot feel more sativa-y, uppy, as you'd expect in concert with a stimulant. even while smoking, I can continue to focus on reading more or less well, depending how loud/entertaining TV shows are.
t:9:00. After taking a few hours off the buds and focus gradually slipping from research, I take 2 0.5mg clonazepams. Girlfriend is very tired and goes to bed, I rub one out. (It's cool! Don't picture an 'oh i'm too tired' situation of lame resentment. Sometimes folks is too tired, and we are on very different schedules. Weekends is the predominant, though by no means only, sexy time. But that there was the paradigm of a TMI digression, and I'd erase it if it wasn't hilarious and true and somewhat relevant to the trip report that I choked the proverbial chicken)
t:9:30. feeling great for all sorts of reasons, I smoke another two bowls of this AK47-kush hybrid that is, i reiterate, kickass. even though my tolerance by this point in the day makes me sad I have confidence in the klonopins.
t:10:00. there it is! feeling like a fun stoned and drunk combination, but mentally and physically clearer. the lingering energy from the ritalins I think keeps me from feeling too tired, but motor control is pretty sloppy. I get up to get iced tea and have to really focus to not be falling all over the place. something that'd never happen to me from straight kush. I know 1mg k-pin is not a very large dose so I take another 0.5mg pill.
t:until now, 2am EST. I decide to write this lengthy report while getting progressively more stoned from the pills and weed. feel quite clear sitting here typing, but when I try to move around i have many physical symptoms of drunkenness. getting tired now, that being at least one intended goal of these clonazepams - I think without them I would not really be 'feeling' the MPH anymore but also not feeling as tired as I ought to at 2am.
sorry if this hardly seems like a 'trip' by the standards of some crazy combinations on here, but these kinds of experimental-therapeutic reports have their place too! I thought it would be fun to write out while I was still a bit reeling from the herb and k-pins. my personal verdict is that the methylphenidate is for me a stimulant that merits further experimentation as a study aid. in spite of many on these boards suggesting it is far worse than e.g. dexamphetamine (which I prefer too!). hopefully it's OK to end off with some questions because I have a few. any suggestions on how I might direct those efforts in researching my personal interactions with MPH? would higher doses be useful in improving focus and productivity without curbing retention or sending me into a jittery useless state?
the clonazepam is fun and I certainly used it recreationally today, though in a pretty small dosage the synergy with herb is great. i fear benzos a bit and really only got these as a package deal... would never consume on a regular basis. but i wonder less recreationally whether one of these 0.5mg tabs might be useful in curbing highly circumscribed forms of anxiety, e.g. in advance of a particular examination? would there be negative cognitive effects that might outweigh the benefits of the moderate anxiety-reduction?
so leaving it at that, going to smoke one last bag and watch sons of anarchy!
So, to begin. Today I happened upon some generic methylphenidate ERs and clonazepams. A little birdy brought them to my window, and after she went through a rigorous examination ultimately diagnosed me with condition x that, like totally justified stuff I proceeded with my bioassay.
You see, I don't have any real diagnosis of anything and I contest the whole illness model and the clinicization of cognitive functioning and prescription psychotropic drugs. These are to support a period of enhanced cognitive functioning in preparation for a significant examination. But oh no, that's outside the limited sphere of psychiatric rationality these days, so I'd have to claim (falsely in my view) to have a disease to get the damn things... though quite material to my own academic research that's all beside the point. I obtained my substances from Dr. Bluebird, and his colleague Dr. Greenbird, and immediately took two of the methylphenidates with the intention of facilitating some studying over the course of the day. Previously in the day i'd smoked some quite fantastic pot, but by that point (2pm EST: t=0) it had worn out a bit.
t:-0:05. I eat a hamburger. Bacon, cheese, mayonnaise, barbecue sauce. It is tasty. I have heard of the anorectic effects of MPH, and though I have not experienced them much I did not wish to be starving and gutrotty hours later having had no desire to eat.
t:0. Consumption of pills. 2 generic 18mg methylphenidate ERs, marking 'Z' on one hand and '18' on the other.
t:0:10. I vaporize a bag of same high-quality marijuana. It gets me quite stoned. My rationale is I'd been feeling a bit anxious about taking stims, and trying to do productive work, so I'd give myself a dose of some familiar flavours to soften the blow. I don't get anxious with pot generally, and this is a strong indica that really chills me out. I pull out a book about the cultural function of PET scan images and start to work through it, taking notes on my iPad. I am distracted by the fact that I stopped watching an episode of Breaking Bad to eat aforementioned hamburger, and to check the mail. I finish watching the episode.
t:0:30. I'm moderately stoned still. Back to reading the PET scan book. I don't have much trouble studying when I am straight up baked. Though probably if I'd smoked more than one bag, I would have been more stoned still, and more unable to focus on book. A bag from my vape consists of roughly a .15-.2gram bowl which takes a good 10 minutes to suck back, so it draws out the stone a much longer time if you take multiple bowls. you can be literally in process of consuming weed for upwards of 40 minutes. then you are so stoned you become quite unsure of what to do and forget what you meant to accomplish in the midst of statements and/or tasks. (i digress, I'm in that state just now as I write.)
t:1:00. The methylphenidate clarity has broken through the lingering pot fuzz. I get a bit twitchy at first and trepidacious since this is only my third time taking this drug, second time orally. but I loosen up after a few minutes and focus on the book. I find myself proceeding through it quickly, but sometimes getting hung up on passages and quickly rereading them several times before I could gather their meanings. sometimes the passages were themselves hard to follow and needing the reread, but other times it seemed like I was just getting needlessly confused.
t:2:00. I've done pretty well on this book. Gotten to the conclusion when a friend comes by, we'd planned to discuss this PET scan book and a few others. So we have a drink of water and after basic chitchat get down to discussing these materials. We talk for a few hours - sometimes I feel a bit more articulate or less articulate than usual, sometimes I feel quite wide awake and clear, other times I get to yawning a bit. A good productive discussion, although I didn't take much in the way of notes and I am not 100% sure how much of it will linger in the ol' memory banks given the rest of the story. He will send me his own notes on some works though so useful additional sources of information are gained.
t:4:00. Girlfriend is home. I say hi, friend and I finish off our discussion and he heads off. I didn't mention to friend that I was on some Ritalin at the time, nor girlfriend, and neither noticed anything amiss. No big deal if I were to tell them, but there would be an intrigued discussion and I didn't want to get into it just then. Also wanted to see how well I could 'pass' as not on psychotropic drugs - obviously just fine, given that these dosages are commonly given to kids with the idea that it just makes them function 'normally.' (A wacky notion I think but again beside the point.) I spend some time alternating between chatting with girlfriend, we eat some dinner, then I read some more. no real anorectic effects, but a little heartburn which is rare for me. I focus reasonably well on some reading for a bit, but the TV comes on and though I keep on reading I do periodically get distracted by TV. like most 'ADD drugs' I find the Ritalin has more of a stimulant effect than any kind of magic 'focus' power - if you're the kind of person who when stimulated gets super into something and stays on task, and the problem is just you're not properly stimulated in the brain, then it'll do it for you, but otherwise you're just more stimulated version of your attention-hopping self. Or...maybe that has something to do with the weed. Whatever, I still do OK hopping my attention around, and if I can hop faster that is a bonus.
t:4:30. I vape a couple more bags of weed, and most definitely feeling a weird synchronic effect that affirms the methylphenidate is doing its thing. this doesn't quite describe it but in a way the effects of my strong indica pot feel more sativa-y, uppy, as you'd expect in concert with a stimulant. even while smoking, I can continue to focus on reading more or less well, depending how loud/entertaining TV shows are.
t:9:00. After taking a few hours off the buds and focus gradually slipping from research, I take 2 0.5mg clonazepams. Girlfriend is very tired and goes to bed, I rub one out. (It's cool! Don't picture an 'oh i'm too tired' situation of lame resentment. Sometimes folks is too tired, and we are on very different schedules. Weekends is the predominant, though by no means only, sexy time. But that there was the paradigm of a TMI digression, and I'd erase it if it wasn't hilarious and true and somewhat relevant to the trip report that I choked the proverbial chicken)
t:9:30. feeling great for all sorts of reasons, I smoke another two bowls of this AK47-kush hybrid that is, i reiterate, kickass. even though my tolerance by this point in the day makes me sad I have confidence in the klonopins.
t:10:00. there it is! feeling like a fun stoned and drunk combination, but mentally and physically clearer. the lingering energy from the ritalins I think keeps me from feeling too tired, but motor control is pretty sloppy. I get up to get iced tea and have to really focus to not be falling all over the place. something that'd never happen to me from straight kush. I know 1mg k-pin is not a very large dose so I take another 0.5mg pill.
t:until now, 2am EST. I decide to write this lengthy report while getting progressively more stoned from the pills and weed. feel quite clear sitting here typing, but when I try to move around i have many physical symptoms of drunkenness. getting tired now, that being at least one intended goal of these clonazepams - I think without them I would not really be 'feeling' the MPH anymore but also not feeling as tired as I ought to at 2am.
sorry if this hardly seems like a 'trip' by the standards of some crazy combinations on here, but these kinds of experimental-therapeutic reports have their place too! I thought it would be fun to write out while I was still a bit reeling from the herb and k-pins. my personal verdict is that the methylphenidate is for me a stimulant that merits further experimentation as a study aid. in spite of many on these boards suggesting it is far worse than e.g. dexamphetamine (which I prefer too!). hopefully it's OK to end off with some questions because I have a few. any suggestions on how I might direct those efforts in researching my personal interactions with MPH? would higher doses be useful in improving focus and productivity without curbing retention or sending me into a jittery useless state?
the clonazepam is fun and I certainly used it recreationally today, though in a pretty small dosage the synergy with herb is great. i fear benzos a bit and really only got these as a package deal... would never consume on a regular basis. but i wonder less recreationally whether one of these 0.5mg tabs might be useful in curbing highly circumscribed forms of anxiety, e.g. in advance of a particular examination? would there be negative cognitive effects that might outweigh the benefits of the moderate anxiety-reduction?
so leaving it at that, going to smoke one last bag and watch sons of anarchy!
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