albion__bladmin
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2009
- Messages
- 3
He brought me to his room.
"Just a little bit at first okay?" He pulled the mint container out of his dresser drawer and opened it revealing a small stack of white crystals.
"Yeah a little bit." I agreed. "I just want to try it."
He cut the stack using his ID's and morphed two small lines. He looked up at me.
"Are you sure?"
I nodded and grinned. "Positive."
He handed me the straw.
It burned. It burned bad. I sniffed, tilting my head back. "Ouch."
He laughed. I sat on the bed, not really feeling anything.
"How long does it take to work?" I asked. He shrugged. "It really depends. I don't know how good this shit is but it isn't cut with anything."
I walked around the room feeling it drip down the back of my throat and pool into my mouth.
"Give it some time." He looked at me. "I have to go back to work." He looked longingly at the glassy powder. "Man, I want to do it right now so bad. I'll come back and find you when I get off work."
I made my way down the hallway and stairwell. My heart had sped up but I didn't really feel anything, only the acidic taste in my mouth. Outside, there were no stars. As soon as I reached the dorm, I remembered that I'd been invited to Natalie's room to have a couple of drinks. I headed back and knocked on the door.
They let me in and I sat on the bed. I was offered a drink but didn't want it. That's when I realized I didn't want to be sitting. I wanted to be doing something. Going somewhere. I wanted a purpose even if it was as simple as getting a coke from the employee pub.
I told them that I would see them later and walked back to the dorm after retrieving my prized soda from the employee pub. Some people were on the porch so I talked to them before meeting up with Cassidy and heading back to Natalie's room.
I laid on the bed, wanting to do something but keeping my mouth shut. I picked up her book A million little pieces and started to flip through it. Jake left the room to go to the bathroom and I heard a deep voice. "Oh look, we didn't even have to knock."
At the door were two security guards. They peered their heads in.
"What do you got there?" asked one of them to Natalie who was holding the bottle behind her back.
"Nothing." She told them.
"Can we have a look?" They entered the room and looked behind her revealing the bottle clutched in her hands. "Can I see some ID?"
"I'm going to go have a cigarette." Cassidy said, standing.
"Uh, and I'll follow." We passed by security and for some reason, didn't stop us. That's when I realized I was holding my breath.
"Fuckin pigs." Cassidy breathed. We quickly left Juniper and stepped into the night. I looked up at the sky again. No stars. We made our way towards the hotel, and I realized how beautiful everything was.
Sitting on one of the benches, Cassidy pulled out a cigarette while I leaned back. I wanted to talk. So I did. I felt emotionally open and told her my whole story while she sat in silence.
"I'm not talking to much am I?" I asked.
"No. Not at all. I like hearing people's stories."
"What's yours?" I asked. My mouth felt dry and my breath stale. I took a sip of water.
"Don't have one." She took a drag.
"Come on. Everyone has a story." I nudged her playfully. She shrugged. "Grew up in the same town. Knew the same people. It's all the same."
I thought about that and couldn't even imagine having the same experience your whole life. After being shifted around so much, it's all that I knew and as much as I hate change, at the same time it's what I live for.
I felt so alive. I just wanted to think and think and god, I wanted to write because right now, I had so much to say and all the right words to say it. I split ways with Cassidy and went back to my room and wrote on my computer, whatever thoughts I had. I felt good about it.
He came back to my room. "Ready to do some more?"
I nodded. I don't know how many lines I did but man, did I feel good. Everything was clear. Clarifying. Like I could understand anything and make anyone understand anything. I could focus on one thought. I could actually think about something and it made sense instead of a jumble of random shit floating in my head that I could never piece together. and I was wide fucking awake.
I started talking to him. About everything. Religion, Politcs, Depression, ADHD, My past. Fuck anything and everything. I told him how I wanted to write a book. My dreams of becoming an author and he told me I should. I really should.
And I really really felt like I could do it. It could happen.
We talked until the sun came up. Eight hours had gone by in no time. My hands were coated in rust from fiddling with my caribener all night. I headed back to my dorm, stopping to look in the mirror. I was amazed to see at this one time use, it already had a slight toll on my body. I never really believed those "before and after" meth use photos you always see hanging in classrooms. My eyes were slightly dilated, hair rumbled and my complexion was grey. I was started to break out on my forehead. Underneath my nose was red and my mouth was still so dry.
I screwed around online for awhile before finally getting into bed. I suddenly felt exhausted but I was sweating, hot and couldn't get comfortable. I tossed and turned until 5 at night, feeling like I only had a couple of hours of sleep.
I got up and went to dinner, still feeling a bit wired. Still definitely feeling it in my body but the high was so different then anything I had ever experienced. I could be completely functional. I forced myself to eat a bite of a burger and that's all I could do. It felt tasteless in my mouth, like trying to chew a wad of paper towels. I wasn't hungry.
I didn't feel normal until the next day and I wanted more. It's all I was thinking about. I knew I had to work the next day but I really didn't care. I waited for him on the porch.
"I waited too long to buy it." He told me in a hushed voice.
"Oh." Was all I said. I didn't believe him. Not at all. I knew he just wanted it all to himself but hell, I couldn't blame him.
"All good things have to end." He shrugged and left.
I watched him leave part of me feeling extremely disappointed but the other part feeling glad. Because I know I would have done it and kept doing it.
I was addicted.
"Just a little bit at first okay?" He pulled the mint container out of his dresser drawer and opened it revealing a small stack of white crystals.
"Yeah a little bit." I agreed. "I just want to try it."
He cut the stack using his ID's and morphed two small lines. He looked up at me.
"Are you sure?"
I nodded and grinned. "Positive."
He handed me the straw.
It burned. It burned bad. I sniffed, tilting my head back. "Ouch."
He laughed. I sat on the bed, not really feeling anything.
"How long does it take to work?" I asked. He shrugged. "It really depends. I don't know how good this shit is but it isn't cut with anything."
I walked around the room feeling it drip down the back of my throat and pool into my mouth.
"Give it some time." He looked at me. "I have to go back to work." He looked longingly at the glassy powder. "Man, I want to do it right now so bad. I'll come back and find you when I get off work."
I made my way down the hallway and stairwell. My heart had sped up but I didn't really feel anything, only the acidic taste in my mouth. Outside, there were no stars. As soon as I reached the dorm, I remembered that I'd been invited to Natalie's room to have a couple of drinks. I headed back and knocked on the door.
They let me in and I sat on the bed. I was offered a drink but didn't want it. That's when I realized I didn't want to be sitting. I wanted to be doing something. Going somewhere. I wanted a purpose even if it was as simple as getting a coke from the employee pub.
I told them that I would see them later and walked back to the dorm after retrieving my prized soda from the employee pub. Some people were on the porch so I talked to them before meeting up with Cassidy and heading back to Natalie's room.
I laid on the bed, wanting to do something but keeping my mouth shut. I picked up her book A million little pieces and started to flip through it. Jake left the room to go to the bathroom and I heard a deep voice. "Oh look, we didn't even have to knock."
At the door were two security guards. They peered their heads in.
"What do you got there?" asked one of them to Natalie who was holding the bottle behind her back.
"Nothing." She told them.
"Can we have a look?" They entered the room and looked behind her revealing the bottle clutched in her hands. "Can I see some ID?"
"I'm going to go have a cigarette." Cassidy said, standing.
"Uh, and I'll follow." We passed by security and for some reason, didn't stop us. That's when I realized I was holding my breath.
"Fuckin pigs." Cassidy breathed. We quickly left Juniper and stepped into the night. I looked up at the sky again. No stars. We made our way towards the hotel, and I realized how beautiful everything was.
Sitting on one of the benches, Cassidy pulled out a cigarette while I leaned back. I wanted to talk. So I did. I felt emotionally open and told her my whole story while she sat in silence.
"I'm not talking to much am I?" I asked.
"No. Not at all. I like hearing people's stories."
"What's yours?" I asked. My mouth felt dry and my breath stale. I took a sip of water.
"Don't have one." She took a drag.
"Come on. Everyone has a story." I nudged her playfully. She shrugged. "Grew up in the same town. Knew the same people. It's all the same."
I thought about that and couldn't even imagine having the same experience your whole life. After being shifted around so much, it's all that I knew and as much as I hate change, at the same time it's what I live for.
I felt so alive. I just wanted to think and think and god, I wanted to write because right now, I had so much to say and all the right words to say it. I split ways with Cassidy and went back to my room and wrote on my computer, whatever thoughts I had. I felt good about it.
He came back to my room. "Ready to do some more?"
I nodded. I don't know how many lines I did but man, did I feel good. Everything was clear. Clarifying. Like I could understand anything and make anyone understand anything. I could focus on one thought. I could actually think about something and it made sense instead of a jumble of random shit floating in my head that I could never piece together. and I was wide fucking awake.
I started talking to him. About everything. Religion, Politcs, Depression, ADHD, My past. Fuck anything and everything. I told him how I wanted to write a book. My dreams of becoming an author and he told me I should. I really should.
And I really really felt like I could do it. It could happen.
We talked until the sun came up. Eight hours had gone by in no time. My hands were coated in rust from fiddling with my caribener all night. I headed back to my dorm, stopping to look in the mirror. I was amazed to see at this one time use, it already had a slight toll on my body. I never really believed those "before and after" meth use photos you always see hanging in classrooms. My eyes were slightly dilated, hair rumbled and my complexion was grey. I was started to break out on my forehead. Underneath my nose was red and my mouth was still so dry.
I screwed around online for awhile before finally getting into bed. I suddenly felt exhausted but I was sweating, hot and couldn't get comfortable. I tossed and turned until 5 at night, feeling like I only had a couple of hours of sleep.
I got up and went to dinner, still feeling a bit wired. Still definitely feeling it in my body but the high was so different then anything I had ever experienced. I could be completely functional. I forced myself to eat a bite of a burger and that's all I could do. It felt tasteless in my mouth, like trying to chew a wad of paper towels. I wasn't hungry.
I didn't feel normal until the next day and I wanted more. It's all I was thinking about. I knew I had to work the next day but I really didn't care. I waited for him on the porch.
"I waited too long to buy it." He told me in a hushed voice.
"Oh." Was all I said. I didn't believe him. Not at all. I knew he just wanted it all to himself but hell, I couldn't blame him.
"All good things have to end." He shrugged and left.
I watched him leave part of me feeling extremely disappointed but the other part feeling glad. Because I know I would have done it and kept doing it.
I was addicted.
