Benzos methadone, klonopin and ativatan?! help please?

[pahn]

HI all. been on methadone maintenance for about 4 months just dropped from 70 to 60mg day. i usually dabble with benzos for anxiety, and to get a benzo high i wont lie. i have been known to take 10mg of xanax. i usually take about 3-5mg of xanax thats my usual dose. i may redose tho. lately xanax hasnt been around. last night i got 6 1mg klonopin which did nothing, i thought maybe since i spaced them out so much plus i ate with them. so this morn i took 7mg all at once right after my 60mg methadone dose at 10am. i felt NOTHING!!!! so disapointing! i got my hands on 19 .5mg ativans. ativans used to be my favs before i found xanax. im afraid to take the ativan now that i took such a large amount of klonopin this morn already since they have such a long half life. i only took 1.5mg, but i'd like to take like 4-6mg, but i'm so afraid of dying!!! i hear death stories constantly bout mixing benzos with methadone any help would be greatly apprecieated!!!