Hey guys,
Haven't been on here in a few months, so thought I'd give an update as to my progress as I said I would. So it's been 10 months today since I last took MDMA. My symptoms have gotten a bit better but still suffering from bad dizziness, weird head sensations, DP/DR, anxiety, and my head generally feeling fucked. The dizziness is the worst, it's a constant pulsing in the background that feels like a dull brain zap, triggered even further when I move my head.
I was prescribed 15mg Mirtazapine nearly 3 months ago, I was on this dosage for a month. This helped but I found it used to make me feel pretty drowsy a lot of the time, so I moved up to 30mg and I've been on that a month and a half. I was very reluctant to take any medication because to me that felt like a step in the wrong direction and the problem would become a lot more real. However, it has helped me a lot. I went from feeling completely doomed every day, to feeling kind of ok. It's helped me a lot and pulled me out of a hole and I would recommend it to anyone in the same position if you feel you're reaching breaking point.
Mirtazapine does increase your appetite a bit, but i don't notice that anymore. It also affects HPPD but this is a side effect of the drug, I think it happens even with non-LTC users. I barely notice it anyway.
I was prescribed anti vertigo drugs for the dizziness (betahistine) but this didn't seem to do a lot, just made me hayfever 100x worse as it's an analogue of histamine.
I've also been going to some mindfulness sessions. I would say these can help to a certain point, it's good to get things off your chest and there are some good techniques which can make things easier, although it won't get rid of your physical symptoms. The doctor I saw and my mindfulness therapist are absolutely convinced it's anxiety, they don't seem to have experience with the MDMA LTC. He basically showed me all the evidence of this being anxiety, and pointed out I didn't have any evidence for it being biological damage, which is a fair point but he has no idea what the symptoms feel like!
Looking forward to the future, things can only go up from this point on.