Situation:
Last weekend I smoked a little pot with some friends. One friend packed two bowls in a water bong, of which I smoked about 3 small puffs out of each bowl. The pot was fairly high quality. I tried to smoke only a little because I tend to get paranoid when I smoke pot. The environment was as follows: my friends live in an apartment on the first floor; the patio doors and blinds were open; people were there that I've never met before; my friends brought up the fact that the neighbors had called the police during a pervious party concerning noise--they've never had any legal problems, the police just asked them to turn the volume down. For entertainment, a friend of theirs turned Children of the Corn and Halloween Five on, which freaked me out. My reactions were as follows: I became very very quiet; I didn't say anything, I just became really quiet and nervous.
Background:
Pot was not the first drug I tried. I tried e, acid, and hydrocodone before pot. When I first tried pot (about three summers ago) I found it enjoyable: I got giddy, euphoric, and laughed a lot. I noticed time distortions when I first started smoking, but I found them interesting.
After smoking that summer, I went to college and smoked in that environment. Things changed. I began to get paranoid, suspicious of people (I thought they were talking about me), and was very judgemental of myself.
Ever since then (the first paranoid college pot experience), I've ALWAYS had bad pot "trips."
Also, I should mention that I have anxiety issues and that I've had a coke problem in the past. I've not done coke in a long time, and this has been the first time I've done pot in almost a year.
Questions:
1. Is it possible to be negatively conditioned concerning pot? Since I've had that first negative experience, I seem to go into that same mindset: things are going to be bad; the entire high scares me, especially the time distortions.
2. If negative conditioning exists, is it possible to recondition yourself to have positive experiences again? I mean, I would like to smoke pot again if it was a positive experience. I'm not sure if this would be effective, or how I could go about this. Does anyone have any suggestions?
3. Would my former coke problem affect my present pot experiences? I'm pretty sure pot and coke affect different neurotransmitters, but could the after effects of my coke use cause problems with pot?
4. Finally, I've never had bad trips on other psychedelics (acid, shrooms, ketamine); it's just been pot. Whenever I smoke pot, it's like a mini-acid trip. Whereas most people relax, it seems to make me (now) uptight and very anxious.
Purpose:
The purpose of this post was to get any suggestions as to how I might have a positive pot experience again, and to explain why I may have negative experiences now.
BTW:
I should have included this in the original post. I was also drinking (two drinks with rum and Dr. Pepper) and did a few poppers. Ok, for those who don't know what poppers are. It's slang from Amyl Nitrate, but I'm pretty sure the stuff people buy around here isn't Amyl Nitrate. You go into a store and ask for "Video Head Cleaner." It's a liquid that comes in a small brown vial, and you inhale the vapors quickly then put the cap back on. To be honest, I'm not sure what the stuff actually is. I don't think it's Amyl because I think that's illegal in this state. Anyway, it produces a "rush" for about 10 seconds then you're back to normal. I don't think the alcohol or poppers contributed to the paranoia, because I wasn't really drunk and I only did a few poppers. Also, like I said before, I've always gotten paranoid on pot since that first bad experience.
