vanillawhip
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 14, 2014
- Messages
- 13
This story is completely messed up and it's scaring me to death. I did mushrooms for the first time last night and i'm petrified to do them ever again. Here's my story…
My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for 4 months now and he's very open and experienced with drugs and what they do. We smoke weed together on a daily basis and everything is fine! He had bought shrooms from his buddy and had done them once - I was with him but did not par-take. He seemed super happy and chilled out, and giggled at everything. He seemed to have a nice trip but I was still too convinced I would have a bad trip to take part. He had some left over and last night I thought "why the hell not." We threw some shrooms in a grinder and grinded them up to put them in our tea. The tea wasn't bad - just looked super unappealing and a bit disgusting… It looked like brown water with a bunch of boogers in it, really. (Yum… http://i.bluelight.ru/s/eyesclosed.gif) I finished my tea before him - I was fine, although all my shrooms had landed on the bottom - which resulted in me having to take 2 or 3 big spoonfuls/mouthfuls of my shrooms by themselves. I was disgusted but I tried telling myself I was okay and tried imagining my tea as Italian Wedding Soup or something to that extent to make it feel better.
After a while, I began to trip. Everything was nice. I was seeing the most crazy colours and all the lines in the room began to warp. I was sitting on the bed and could see the mirror reflection of the room from where I was. I asked my boyfriend if the curtain was moving, he said "no." I laughed and told him I seen it "dancing" and then rays of light began to come off everything. I told him and he said this was expected, and that I was probably seeing and feeling the vibrations of everything. So quickly, things began to morph into green and pink squares, in a weird zigzag/chevron pattern. I began to feel scared and couldn't snap back to reality. I got really scared and kept telling my boyfriend I didn't like it already. He told me to keep calm or else i'll have a horrible trip. I made myself laugh and laid down. I stared at the ceiling and the ceiling morphed into a bunch of bright yellow pyramids - then eventually a sun set. I told my boyfriend this, and he told me he was happy I was enjoying myself - but I was still really scared and confused. I wasn't enjoying myself at all.
We decided we wanted to watch something on the wii, so he told me to choose something. I picked up the wii controller and started getting frustrated. The vibrating feeling of the controller as well as me having to (what felt like) do so much hard work was driving me crazy. I said "babe, I can't do this. I'm so scared." I begin to panic really bad. I dropped the controller and turned to him. When I turned, my vision snapped into extremely irritating and vibrant colours - blinding oranges and yellows, and I could still see the pink and green squares. I started breathing heavy and looked at my boyfriend. He began shape shifting and his face turned into a yellow/orange diamond, and his eyebrows and facial hair went bright red and turned into sharp, straight lines of hair. I started bawling my eyes out. He tried touching me and I pulled away. My breathing got so, so heavy and I felt my body start shaking ferociously. This also scared me and I knew it was only going to get worse. I looked at the tv, and my vision changed again. Everything but the Netflix/Wii screen was animated - and still so vibrant. I looked back at him and my vision swirled (in a literal zig zag, I can't even explain) to meet his and I grabbed his knee, complaining over and over that I was terrified and I wanted my trip to stop. It kept getting worse. I looked at my hands and I was shaking, he kept telling me to drink water and told me he was going to get some. I started screaming and freaking out - feeling like if he left the room, i'd literally probably die. At this point, there was a voice in my head saying "you aren't even real, you're not even really here.". My physical self was gone. I was clung to my boyfriends leg and out of nowhere, shot up and stood up. I yelled "Can I just --- like, I just need to like ---" he stood up with me and told me he was scared and I needed to sit down. He was asking if I wanted to go outside on an adventure, or if I wanted to lay down. I didn't know what I wanted. Everything was still animated and my trip now was consisting of the same scenario happening over and over, and I couldn't break it. The voice in my head was telling me "you have no control, you're trapped" while another voice told me "you're okay, you just took shrooms and you're freaking out, relax." At this point, after breathing heavily, breaking into a horrible sweat and balling my eyes out, I decided I needed fresh air. I was so scared still. I got my coat and mitts on and together we went outside. It was freezing, as it's the middle of winter where I live so that made me uncomfortable but I tried to not let it bother me. My boyfriend went around the side of the house to pee - and even though he had told me what he was doing, I freaked out when I turned around and seen him gone. I began panicking again and yelling "Where are you? Babe where did you go?!" and he didn't reply. I was terrified. The shakes and heavy breathing was still happening. He came back around and asked how I was doing. I said I couldn't do it and I NEEDED to go back inside. As soon as we went inside, my boyfriends roommates asked if I was okay. I yelled "this is disgusting!!!!" and my boyfriend explained it was my first time with this drug. I felt panic-y again and had a vision - or so I thought - of me walking back into my boyfriends room - and even though I didn't think I walked there, I had and was sitting back on the bed.
At this point, I couldn't sit still. I was so fidgeting and kept shaking my hands out of panic. I told my boyfriend I was cold and couldn't take my jacket off. Or my mitts. I was shivering and told my boyfriend I thought I was dying. I asked him to cuddle me and keep me warm or else i'd die - but I also had to pee. I got up and went. I peed for what was literally 60 seconds or more. I got up afterwards and made the mistake of looking in the mirror as I washed my hands. I have blue eyes and they were completely black. My pupil had expanded so much I couldn't see much of my eye. This made me panic. I started tripping out and my hair began changing colours and my eyes kept getting bigger then going smaller. I felt myself get scared again and went back in the room. I told my boyfriend I needed the light off because I was so scared - I just wanted to be asleep - there was no way I could stay awake and keep induring this. My boyfriend tried keeping me warm and relaxed, and I began to come down. He told me I had been tripping out and reacting that way for 3 or 4 hours. To me it felt like 2, the most… I still feel as if my "repetitive visions" were on repeat, and I was mentally trapped in those thoughts. I couldn't explain what I was seeing or why I was frustrated and it drove me nuts. The visions mixed back between seeing the edge of a table, seeing a water bottle, then a red cup, then a tv, then my boyfriend super close to me, then his door. When I was having these trips he tried being close to me and I kept pushing him away and asking who he was, and felt as if he wasn't real. I had to convince myself I was a real person and that he was indeed, my real and human boyfriend. I kept thinking of my mom and my best friend, and had to tell myself these were real people too. I began questioning my existence and had almost came to the conclusion I had died.
Laying with my boyfriend, I began processing the horrible things I had just seen. I was still tripping so bad but now it was a totally different playing field. Instead of the room being bright and vibrant, it was dark and the only light source was the tv which was playing America's Funniest Home Video's because he thought it would make me feel better. I still had my coat and mittens on and was still clinging to him and shaking. America's Funniest Home Video's to me, was on for maximum 15 minutes - when it was really on for 2 hours or so.
The entire time the show played, I had felt like I was dying - in the weirdest way. I felt as if my body was slowly going back into the womb, and as if I was a fetus again. I felt like my boyfriend was my heat source, and was what would be the equivalent to keep me alive. I hung on to him for dear life. I continuously looked up at him, and each time he looked different. I thought I was time travelling. Each time I looked up, he was a completely different looking man. At one point, his face was a grey sideways and long triangle, and I couldn't even remember what I looked like. I had to keep looking at my hands and asking if I was alive. I also started to think my mittens were a part of me. I had it in my mind that my body was shutting down, and taking me back through the layers of time to back when I was a fetus in a womb before I died. The people I seen my boyfriend as, I have no idea who they were. At one point he looked like a caveman - and at another point, everything was made out of running shoes. I can't even explain the things I seen and I could honestly go on forever about how much I don't understand my trip. I have never been so scared or so convinced I wasn't real, ever and I can honestly say I will NEVER experiment with shrooms again. I trip so hard on weed, I feel like any other drug is dangerous to my personal self.
After it all, my boyfriend looked at my phone around 1am. The last time I remember was 4pm. Thats the last time I was coherent. He told me I was in the middle of a text message, and when I got scared, I panicked and threw my phone down.
I wasn't even a functioning human between 4pm and 1am and even at 1am, I was still completely messed up.
NEVER again. Be safe guys, this was the scariest thing ever…http://i.bluelight.ru/s/frown.gif
My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for 4 months now and he's very open and experienced with drugs and what they do. We smoke weed together on a daily basis and everything is fine! He had bought shrooms from his buddy and had done them once - I was with him but did not par-take. He seemed super happy and chilled out, and giggled at everything. He seemed to have a nice trip but I was still too convinced I would have a bad trip to take part. He had some left over and last night I thought "why the hell not." We threw some shrooms in a grinder and grinded them up to put them in our tea. The tea wasn't bad - just looked super unappealing and a bit disgusting… It looked like brown water with a bunch of boogers in it, really. (Yum… http://i.bluelight.ru/s/eyesclosed.gif) I finished my tea before him - I was fine, although all my shrooms had landed on the bottom - which resulted in me having to take 2 or 3 big spoonfuls/mouthfuls of my shrooms by themselves. I was disgusted but I tried telling myself I was okay and tried imagining my tea as Italian Wedding Soup or something to that extent to make it feel better.
After a while, I began to trip. Everything was nice. I was seeing the most crazy colours and all the lines in the room began to warp. I was sitting on the bed and could see the mirror reflection of the room from where I was. I asked my boyfriend if the curtain was moving, he said "no." I laughed and told him I seen it "dancing" and then rays of light began to come off everything. I told him and he said this was expected, and that I was probably seeing and feeling the vibrations of everything. So quickly, things began to morph into green and pink squares, in a weird zigzag/chevron pattern. I began to feel scared and couldn't snap back to reality. I got really scared and kept telling my boyfriend I didn't like it already. He told me to keep calm or else i'll have a horrible trip. I made myself laugh and laid down. I stared at the ceiling and the ceiling morphed into a bunch of bright yellow pyramids - then eventually a sun set. I told my boyfriend this, and he told me he was happy I was enjoying myself - but I was still really scared and confused. I wasn't enjoying myself at all.
We decided we wanted to watch something on the wii, so he told me to choose something. I picked up the wii controller and started getting frustrated. The vibrating feeling of the controller as well as me having to (what felt like) do so much hard work was driving me crazy. I said "babe, I can't do this. I'm so scared." I begin to panic really bad. I dropped the controller and turned to him. When I turned, my vision snapped into extremely irritating and vibrant colours - blinding oranges and yellows, and I could still see the pink and green squares. I started breathing heavy and looked at my boyfriend. He began shape shifting and his face turned into a yellow/orange diamond, and his eyebrows and facial hair went bright red and turned into sharp, straight lines of hair. I started bawling my eyes out. He tried touching me and I pulled away. My breathing got so, so heavy and I felt my body start shaking ferociously. This also scared me and I knew it was only going to get worse. I looked at the tv, and my vision changed again. Everything but the Netflix/Wii screen was animated - and still so vibrant. I looked back at him and my vision swirled (in a literal zig zag, I can't even explain) to meet his and I grabbed his knee, complaining over and over that I was terrified and I wanted my trip to stop. It kept getting worse. I looked at my hands and I was shaking, he kept telling me to drink water and told me he was going to get some. I started screaming and freaking out - feeling like if he left the room, i'd literally probably die. At this point, there was a voice in my head saying "you aren't even real, you're not even really here.". My physical self was gone. I was clung to my boyfriends leg and out of nowhere, shot up and stood up. I yelled "Can I just --- like, I just need to like ---" he stood up with me and told me he was scared and I needed to sit down. He was asking if I wanted to go outside on an adventure, or if I wanted to lay down. I didn't know what I wanted. Everything was still animated and my trip now was consisting of the same scenario happening over and over, and I couldn't break it. The voice in my head was telling me "you have no control, you're trapped" while another voice told me "you're okay, you just took shrooms and you're freaking out, relax." At this point, after breathing heavily, breaking into a horrible sweat and balling my eyes out, I decided I needed fresh air. I was so scared still. I got my coat and mitts on and together we went outside. It was freezing, as it's the middle of winter where I live so that made me uncomfortable but I tried to not let it bother me. My boyfriend went around the side of the house to pee - and even though he had told me what he was doing, I freaked out when I turned around and seen him gone. I began panicking again and yelling "Where are you? Babe where did you go?!" and he didn't reply. I was terrified. The shakes and heavy breathing was still happening. He came back around and asked how I was doing. I said I couldn't do it and I NEEDED to go back inside. As soon as we went inside, my boyfriends roommates asked if I was okay. I yelled "this is disgusting!!!!" and my boyfriend explained it was my first time with this drug. I felt panic-y again and had a vision - or so I thought - of me walking back into my boyfriends room - and even though I didn't think I walked there, I had and was sitting back on the bed.
At this point, I couldn't sit still. I was so fidgeting and kept shaking my hands out of panic. I told my boyfriend I was cold and couldn't take my jacket off. Or my mitts. I was shivering and told my boyfriend I thought I was dying. I asked him to cuddle me and keep me warm or else i'd die - but I also had to pee. I got up and went. I peed for what was literally 60 seconds or more. I got up afterwards and made the mistake of looking in the mirror as I washed my hands. I have blue eyes and they were completely black. My pupil had expanded so much I couldn't see much of my eye. This made me panic. I started tripping out and my hair began changing colours and my eyes kept getting bigger then going smaller. I felt myself get scared again and went back in the room. I told my boyfriend I needed the light off because I was so scared - I just wanted to be asleep - there was no way I could stay awake and keep induring this. My boyfriend tried keeping me warm and relaxed, and I began to come down. He told me I had been tripping out and reacting that way for 3 or 4 hours. To me it felt like 2, the most… I still feel as if my "repetitive visions" were on repeat, and I was mentally trapped in those thoughts. I couldn't explain what I was seeing or why I was frustrated and it drove me nuts. The visions mixed back between seeing the edge of a table, seeing a water bottle, then a red cup, then a tv, then my boyfriend super close to me, then his door. When I was having these trips he tried being close to me and I kept pushing him away and asking who he was, and felt as if he wasn't real. I had to convince myself I was a real person and that he was indeed, my real and human boyfriend. I kept thinking of my mom and my best friend, and had to tell myself these were real people too. I began questioning my existence and had almost came to the conclusion I had died.
Laying with my boyfriend, I began processing the horrible things I had just seen. I was still tripping so bad but now it was a totally different playing field. Instead of the room being bright and vibrant, it was dark and the only light source was the tv which was playing America's Funniest Home Video's because he thought it would make me feel better. I still had my coat and mittens on and was still clinging to him and shaking. America's Funniest Home Video's to me, was on for maximum 15 minutes - when it was really on for 2 hours or so.
The entire time the show played, I had felt like I was dying - in the weirdest way. I felt as if my body was slowly going back into the womb, and as if I was a fetus again. I felt like my boyfriend was my heat source, and was what would be the equivalent to keep me alive. I hung on to him for dear life. I continuously looked up at him, and each time he looked different. I thought I was time travelling. Each time I looked up, he was a completely different looking man. At one point, his face was a grey sideways and long triangle, and I couldn't even remember what I looked like. I had to keep looking at my hands and asking if I was alive. I also started to think my mittens were a part of me. I had it in my mind that my body was shutting down, and taking me back through the layers of time to back when I was a fetus in a womb before I died. The people I seen my boyfriend as, I have no idea who they were. At one point he looked like a caveman - and at another point, everything was made out of running shoes. I can't even explain the things I seen and I could honestly go on forever about how much I don't understand my trip. I have never been so scared or so convinced I wasn't real, ever and I can honestly say I will NEVER experiment with shrooms again. I trip so hard on weed, I feel like any other drug is dangerous to my personal self.
After it all, my boyfriend looked at my phone around 1am. The last time I remember was 4pm. Thats the last time I was coherent. He told me I was in the middle of a text message, and when I got scared, I panicked and threw my phone down.
I wasn't even a functioning human between 4pm and 1am and even at 1am, I was still completely messed up.
NEVER again. Be safe guys, this was the scariest thing ever…http://i.bluelight.ru/s/frown.gif
