MasterOfDeception
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 1, 2006
- Messages
- 431
My first experience
So...
I had 3 blotters...Chesire Cats new version or something:
Each one was very strong according to what I had been told and judging from others' experiences[1/4 gave CEV] ,approximately around 80-120 mics each I suppose...I took all three at once..[Just by the time my they touched my mouth, i felt an overwhelming bitterness(and no, please don't say "that wasn't acid". people have been reporting bitter blotters decades before RCs were popular..)..I was sitting on my bed relaxing, having had a long hot shower before.
Needless to say I was a bit anxious and thinking about how the experience would be like, and about what I wanted to gain from it. It started to hit ~15 minutes after...Body sensation was slightly altered and I felt like laughing with no apparent reason.As it was hitting me harder, at first I was feeling sort of stuck into the bed, trying to focus at the music.. Later I was feeling as if getting into time... for 1-2 hours it went up and up and up, I was slowly laughing all the time..
At certain parts I was feeling as if the substance was PUNISHING me, I suppose that was because it also brought me a bit of nausea...after ~4 hours decided to go vomit, I managed to find the target.. :lol: Then I was sort of paranoid that my parents would figure out.. But i eventually managed to clean it.
All senses were intensified, I was hypersensitive to all of them, especially sound...
Furthermore, I didnt know who I am in the universe, confused,startled, --> :huh: :blink: .. I largely wanted to express myself somehow, so i managed to find peace of mind in painting.. Just with a pencil, my hands were doing some sort of fractals, geometrical shapes and i was trying to concetrate and relax, fuel my energy somewhere..
I had the insight of being a much more "primitive" being, but also using more of my brain in a different way, much more speedy.. I HAD to follow my insticts...
I wanted to become more extroverted...
After around 7-8 hours, in the morning , my mother woke up..
I went close to her, smiled, hugged her, asked her how she was doing..
I was restless but couldn't sleep.. When i was alone I had a shower. My sense of time was different, everything appeared more infinite in a way.
If I stared at objects they were changing,morphing, I believe these "hallucinations" are the result of 1) Focusing,concetrating, 2)Images straight from the sub/unconscious 3)Merging of the senses..
Funny thing is I imagined myself as some sort of elf... The way i was sitting on my bed or the way myself looked in the mirror..
Sometimes everything was just too much, even music so i took short breaks and trying to meditate by focusing on my breath and trying to visualize..
+14 hours .I decide to have a walk and meet some friend to talk.. I found one at the moment, we decided to meet in a small park.. He was also startled and was asking me where/how I found the blotters.. i told him to be cautious about lsd and not just take it for "fun", fun in the "mainstream" way. I was laughing inside me, smiling , he thought I was "burned" so in the end i just decided to hug him and tell him "I love you anyways"...
It was feeling weird, as if power of gravity was stronger, as if the earth was grabbing me... I decided to have a walk in a [relatively small] forest inside the city... all i wanted was to hear the birds sing and feel the trees, the humidity,the air.. I was sitting on the benches... Entranced ...
I was forced, and also tried myself, to reform consciousness and awareness, body and mind awareness, reprogramm myself into something else, a new self emerging.
I was slowly coming down.. My reality had been flipped,decomposed, and it I was slowly trying to re-form it , like a puzzle.
Weird enough , finally my memory has become better, more vivid, I learned to focus and channel my energy where I want.. But i've also become even more of a daydreamer, and learned to enjoy everything in life more, even just sitting and breathing.
I was seeing the similarities between things rather than the differencies, everything was ONE in a way.. Even music.. I was into it, every second was perceived as eternity. I was stunned at Tom Heasley - Desert Triptych , the magic of didgeridoo !!
+20 hours i was there sitting with my father and bros , touching them, hugging them and talking to them.. relaxed, sitting on the couch.. About their problems, my problems, generally..
+24 hours.. I didnt want to sleep alone.. decided to sleep in the same bed with my brother.. Trying to calm down and meditate.. Insomnia. I had this fear that I will never return, but i managed to sleep for a few hours i think, having really vivid visuals. I had opened some doors of perception.. What if they never closed again ?? I persuaded myself that it's about which doors you decided to open and which to close
You create your own reality.
On the other hand I also wanted to remember this experience and integrate in my life, which I've done.. The trip never ends, you have to change yourself,In the end, the point of the psychedelic experience is to CHANGE ( for the best). it's pointless to trip and then be exactly the same, making the same mistakes etc etc.
Also I had this insight that ,at least in our society, you'd better not deviate a lot from the normal.. We should always keep a bit of touch with the ground.. Ideal would be trying to see everything as a game, so that you enjoy it more. Like a child. I felt the child in me emerging again.. I hope the core of my soul will always remain like that..
Things seem newer now, I want to explore more of them, stare at them,touch them, feel them...
Intense appreciation for art , and a stronger need to express myself , to be more creative.
** Disclaimer **
Especially for 1st time trippers.. You might read such experiences and get enthusiastic.. But try to learn more for these substances
Before trying to have some intense experience you'd better prepare yourself..
Try to control yourself and not let paranoia and fear overwhelm you.. Follow your insticts but also remain logical... Filter some of your thoughts.
We created our own society.We created our own happiness [ Which doesn't mean resorting to psychedelics or other psychoactives at every chance.. Have a sense of balance..and try to enjoy things in every state (which depends on what you want)] // in my opinion /
!
So...
I had 3 blotters...Chesire Cats new version or something:
Needless to say I was a bit anxious and thinking about how the experience would be like, and about what I wanted to gain from it. It started to hit ~15 minutes after...Body sensation was slightly altered and I felt like laughing with no apparent reason.As it was hitting me harder, at first I was feeling sort of stuck into the bed, trying to focus at the music.. Later I was feeling as if getting into time... for 1-2 hours it went up and up and up, I was slowly laughing all the time..
At certain parts I was feeling as if the substance was PUNISHING me, I suppose that was because it also brought me a bit of nausea...after ~4 hours decided to go vomit, I managed to find the target.. :lol: Then I was sort of paranoid that my parents would figure out.. But i eventually managed to clean it.
All senses were intensified, I was hypersensitive to all of them, especially sound...
Furthermore, I didnt know who I am in the universe, confused,startled, --> :huh: :blink: .. I largely wanted to express myself somehow, so i managed to find peace of mind in painting.. Just with a pencil, my hands were doing some sort of fractals, geometrical shapes and i was trying to concetrate and relax, fuel my energy somewhere..
I had the insight of being a much more "primitive" being, but also using more of my brain in a different way, much more speedy.. I HAD to follow my insticts...
I wanted to become more extroverted...
After around 7-8 hours, in the morning , my mother woke up..
I went close to her, smiled, hugged her, asked her how she was doing..
I was restless but couldn't sleep.. When i was alone I had a shower. My sense of time was different, everything appeared more infinite in a way.
If I stared at objects they were changing,morphing, I believe these "hallucinations" are the result of 1) Focusing,concetrating, 2)Images straight from the sub/unconscious 3)Merging of the senses..
Funny thing is I imagined myself as some sort of elf... The way i was sitting on my bed or the way myself looked in the mirror..
Sometimes everything was just too much, even music so i took short breaks and trying to meditate by focusing on my breath and trying to visualize..
+14 hours .I decide to have a walk and meet some friend to talk.. I found one at the moment, we decided to meet in a small park.. He was also startled and was asking me where/how I found the blotters.. i told him to be cautious about lsd and not just take it for "fun", fun in the "mainstream" way. I was laughing inside me, smiling , he thought I was "burned" so in the end i just decided to hug him and tell him "I love you anyways"...
It was feeling weird, as if power of gravity was stronger, as if the earth was grabbing me... I decided to have a walk in a [relatively small] forest inside the city... all i wanted was to hear the birds sing and feel the trees, the humidity,the air.. I was sitting on the benches... Entranced ...
I was forced, and also tried myself, to reform consciousness and awareness, body and mind awareness, reprogramm myself into something else, a new self emerging.
I was slowly coming down.. My reality had been flipped,decomposed, and it I was slowly trying to re-form it , like a puzzle.
Weird enough , finally my memory has become better, more vivid, I learned to focus and channel my energy where I want.. But i've also become even more of a daydreamer, and learned to enjoy everything in life more, even just sitting and breathing.
I was seeing the similarities between things rather than the differencies, everything was ONE in a way.. Even music.. I was into it, every second was perceived as eternity. I was stunned at Tom Heasley - Desert Triptych , the magic of didgeridoo !!
+20 hours i was there sitting with my father and bros , touching them, hugging them and talking to them.. relaxed, sitting on the couch.. About their problems, my problems, generally..
+24 hours.. I didnt want to sleep alone.. decided to sleep in the same bed with my brother.. Trying to calm down and meditate.. Insomnia. I had this fear that I will never return, but i managed to sleep for a few hours i think, having really vivid visuals. I had opened some doors of perception.. What if they never closed again ?? I persuaded myself that it's about which doors you decided to open and which to close
You create your own reality. On the other hand I also wanted to remember this experience and integrate in my life, which I've done.. The trip never ends, you have to change yourself,In the end, the point of the psychedelic experience is to CHANGE ( for the best). it's pointless to trip and then be exactly the same, making the same mistakes etc etc.
Also I had this insight that ,at least in our society, you'd better not deviate a lot from the normal.. We should always keep a bit of touch with the ground.. Ideal would be trying to see everything as a game, so that you enjoy it more. Like a child. I felt the child in me emerging again.. I hope the core of my soul will always remain like that..
Things seem newer now, I want to explore more of them, stare at them,touch them, feel them...
Intense appreciation for art , and a stronger need to express myself , to be more creative.
** Disclaimer **
Especially for 1st time trippers.. You might read such experiences and get enthusiastic.. But try to learn more for these substances
Before trying to have some intense experience you'd better prepare yourself..
Try to control yourself and not let paranoia and fear overwhelm you.. Follow your insticts but also remain logical... Filter some of your thoughts.
We created our own society.We created our own happiness [ Which doesn't mean resorting to psychedelics or other psychoactives at every chance.. Have a sense of balance..and try to enjoy things in every state (which depends on what you want)] // in my opinion /
!
