roganmaster
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Mar 2, 2010
- Messages
- 350
I’d been contemplating the candyflip since last summer. I trip frequently, but something has always gotten in the way of me actually dosing molly. I wanted my first candyflip to be perfect and now I know it was worth the wait.
It was the most euphoric experience I’ve ever had on drugs.
The trip started normally enough. We had some incredibly pure acid - the kind that you get excited about just by looking at the vial. A single drop under the tongue with a 2400mg of piracetam and we were giddy with anticipation. The group I tripped with was a group I love tripping with, we always achieve the same level when we dose together. We have the best conversations and have lots in common. We’re very like minded. The perfect group.
The setting couldn’t have been more serene, with comfy couches, a large stash of electronic music ranging from Tiesto to Cosmic Gate, with Swedish House Mafia, Kim Fai, and Dirty South mixed in for some more energetic vibes. We all had a few drinks, the buzz from a couple beers really helps the transition from sober to blasting off, it’s the lubricant that allows suggestibility. “Hey, you’re about to embark on a long journey, but don’t worry, you’re in a good place.”
The original plan was to take our friends to the art museum and let the modern art come to life. Unfortunately, getting 5 people on a dose of acid into the mindset to walk a mile and a half in 36F weather is really difficult. Instead, we opted for a walk around the neighborhood. The cold was somewhat sobering. We giggled as people walked by, like a group of stoners that think everyone knows they’re baked off their asses. Everything was funny, and we had tears streaming down our face from laughing about so many different things. One joke flowed into the next.
We continued debating on going to the art museum. I was content in my comfy chair, but my girlfriend really wanted to see art come to life. Another of us was starving and we all realized how hungry we actually were. I’m not used to being hungry on acid, but I came to realize how clean this trip was and that my stomach isn’t in pain like it normally is on a dose of acid. Barbeque chicken was a blast of flavor. Ranch was even better.
Throughout all of this, we were loading lots of whippits. The perfect thing about nitrous is that you control how powerful the experience is. The longer you hold it in, the more visuals are potentiated, the more auditory hallucinations you get, and the more dissociated you become. If I don’t want to have a powerful experience, I only hold it in a few seconds. It’s really the perfect thing for acid. The two are synergistic in a way that no other drug could be. Once you’ve dosed other drugs, you’re stuck with that dose and there’s no going back. The whippit is short, so if you experience a whippit that’s too powerful, it’ll be over within 60 seconds. When everyone inhales their balloon together, you are caught in an instant. It’s a shared moment and that 60 seconds becomes incredible. That portion of the song that’s playing, that visualization that you get when you close your eyes - that’s an experience that you have and can relinquish. No words need to be said at the end of a whippit. A simple “wow…” is all that’s required and everyone knows exactly what you mean.
The best thing about a group of people you really enjoy the company of is that conversations flow into one another with absolutely no effort. We would talk about past shows and raves, music, school and life. We‘d discuss future plans for things we wanted to do together. Someone would say something and it would become instantly hilarious and we would have no idea why. The confusion of it would make us laugh harder until tears were running down our cheeks and we couldn’t breathe. We must be adding years to our life; this is therapy, and it’s so healthy.
We discussed the art museum again, but our hopes were shattered upon realization that it was closing earlier than we had expected. Shoot. I think it was at this moment that I realized today was going to be the day that I would finally candyflip. The setting was perfect. I was having an amazing trip on amazing acid with amazing people. We were all in good headspaces and we still had at least 3-5 hours left in the trip with no plans for the rest of the evening. I convinced my two close friends who lived in the the apartment to do it with me and after some brief discussing, it was finalized. We loaded more piracetam, alpha lipoic acid, and vitamin C. At 7:00pm, I dropped 110mg molly, and redosed with another 20-30mg about 30 minutes later. It’s my favorite way to dose because you start with your initial come up and just as you’re beginning to roll, that last little bit pushes you just a little further.
Normally when I’ve dosed my molly, I’m anxious. Rightly so, I’m just anticipating it because I’m going from being sober and I know that the molly comeup can be a little hard at times. That’s where acid really helps. You’re already high and having fun and enjoying everything that acid has to offer you and you sort of forget about the molly, and before you know it, you’ve come up and you’re rolling balls while the psychedelic images on the computer are warping and shifting. 110mg of just molly has never felt like this. It’s wonderful. When they say that acid and molly potentiate each other, they aren’t lying.
The roll was pure euphoria. I had blasted off this earth and I could easily let everything go. Acid can be difficult at times, and molly is the vessel that sends you to that exact place you want to be, even if you didn’t know you wanted to be there. Molly brings out the best parts of acid, and vice versa. I’ve always thought acid and nitrous was wonderful. Acid and molly are indescribable. I spent the next few hours sinking into the couches, talking with my friends, and giving out hugs (I’m not normally a hugger). I wanted everyone to be as happy as I was, and I wanted to share everything that was awesome for me with other people. Music became an experience, not just something that I really enjoy in different ways on different drugs. Closed eye visuals were dictated by the beat and the melody. The music commanded what I saw, and I saw spirals, patterns, and colors that are normally wonderful on acid, but the novelty of the visuals made me roll harder because of the MDMA. If you ever smell a Vick’s Inhaler on MDMA and you feel that rush that hits you and nearly floors you, the acid visuals do the same thing for MDMA. Psychedelia becomes much more novel and the innocence of MDMA allows you to experience the LSD from a virgin mind.
The old adage is “what goes up must come down,” and when I felt the roll fleeting my brain I became somewhat anxious. I think that this is the time that I would normally re-dose, not accepting the fact that I should come back to sobriety. It’s really the only problem I have with molly: the comedown can be much harsher than many other drugs. Even cocaine. I decided against the re-dose of molly, but remembered that we had about 140mg of ketamine between us and I had never kitty-flipped before. Today was a day for exploration and new experiences, and so we decided to cut up some small bumps on a mirror and go for it. We roll at most once a month, this was the first time we ever rolled together, and we didn’t know when the next time we’d get this opportunity so it was perfect to finally try this.
We piled onto the couch, coming down from the roll and definitely feeling the molly comedown was nearly upon us. We were falling from our peak, tumbling through the stratosphere. It was here that we took in our first line of the K, about 20-25mg. The two other rollers took two lines at once, going for a little harder kitty-flip from the start, and jumped to about 50mgs. I was content with the low dose, as this was only my second time with K. Bumping the K was a fantastic decision!
About 10 minutes later, the K started to take effect. I really don’t know how to describe ketamine other than “chill.” I had no desire to stand. I really liked mellow trance music. We tried to describe the feeling of the low-dose of K to each other and couldn’t come up with anything. It’s like being drunk but not drunk. It’s like a lot of things but it’s not like those things. K is K, and there’s nothing like it yet there’s a lot that’s like it. You can’t use words to describe it, because you find something that seems like it works yet there’s a “but.” K is like <something>, but not at all. My friend said that K is a punctuation mark. It really is. My roll came back a little, and we all realized that the acid was still giving us some good visuals. We were now falling in a combination of LSD, MDMA, and Ketamine, and what a combo it is! My anxieties of coming off a roll were alleviated completely. I was not falling as hard as I normally would at this point in the roll. It was much easier for me to realize that the day had to eventually come to an end and I was perfectly content with it. I was content with everything and there really wasn’t much that could possibly bother me at this point.
Nitrous amplified the effects of the K mostly, but lightly intensified the visuals of the LSD. I was basically stuck to the couch with my close friends and we were in the exact same place together. It was wonderful and we sat in utter silence to a mellow track just playing back the day in our heads. We somehow knew what each other was thinking. We were having the same thoughts together and no words needed to be spoken. The ketamine was the parachute that helped us return to ground level in a pleasant way, not a huge crash. The track faded away with the realization that it was time to get up, collect our thoughts, and bask in the afterglow as we left. There was no bad comedown; we were high but not high. We were at an elevated baseline. I was tired, my brain was a little scattered but in my mind I knew something great had just occurred. I was still finding ways to describe it.
I had shared this experience with my friends. We bonded together. I felt like I closed a chapter of my life with this experience. I completed the candyflip and the kitty-flip; two things that I had always had a desire to do but had never found the right time. Two experiences crossed off my drug bucket list in one amazing day. It was perfection, but yet that somehow doesn’t quite fit it. “Perfect” doesn’t do it justice. We did nothing, and yet it was more than anything. It was a total journey through music, our friendships, and our minds. I’d totally do it again someday.
Postlogue:
I got a lot out of this whole experience. I go through phases with LSD. I’ll go through an acid phase and do acid every few weeks for awhile until I make a breakthrough and then I'll quit for a period of time. This trip was a major breakthrough for me. I said earlier I felt like I closed a chapter in my book, and it still feels so true. LSD helped me accomplish something very special. It’s an experience I’ll never forget. Everything seemed so perfect: the dose, the timing of each drug, the setting, and the people. Never once did I feel overpowered. The candyflip and kittyflip were more than I could possibly imagine.
I finally understand what Alexander Shulgin meant when he said he felt like a “citizen of the universe.” I’ve never had that after MDMA until today.
The best part of it all is that I didn’t feel like I ever came down off the trip. There was just this perfect transition from outer space to being grounded again. LSD provided a launch pad, a perfect place to start. MDMA was the craft that sent me to the moon. And ketamine was the parachute that slowed down the what I thought was going to be a crazy crash down to Earth. It was the perfect three course meal among friends.
The last thing I came to terms with over these past few weeks with LSD (and a little coke here and there) and was set in stone by this trip in particular is that there’s only one thing that truly matters in the grand scheme of your substance use: who you’re with. Your drugs can be pure, you can be at the best show in the world, and you can have everything planned to a T, but the people you’re with make the trip. Nothing else.
Yesterday, I sat on a couch in an apartment with some of the best people I know. I did absolutely nothing, and it was more than I could have dreamed.
It was the most euphoric experience I’ve ever had on drugs.
The trip started normally enough. We had some incredibly pure acid - the kind that you get excited about just by looking at the vial. A single drop under the tongue with a 2400mg of piracetam and we were giddy with anticipation. The group I tripped with was a group I love tripping with, we always achieve the same level when we dose together. We have the best conversations and have lots in common. We’re very like minded. The perfect group.
The setting couldn’t have been more serene, with comfy couches, a large stash of electronic music ranging from Tiesto to Cosmic Gate, with Swedish House Mafia, Kim Fai, and Dirty South mixed in for some more energetic vibes. We all had a few drinks, the buzz from a couple beers really helps the transition from sober to blasting off, it’s the lubricant that allows suggestibility. “Hey, you’re about to embark on a long journey, but don’t worry, you’re in a good place.”
The original plan was to take our friends to the art museum and let the modern art come to life. Unfortunately, getting 5 people on a dose of acid into the mindset to walk a mile and a half in 36F weather is really difficult. Instead, we opted for a walk around the neighborhood. The cold was somewhat sobering. We giggled as people walked by, like a group of stoners that think everyone knows they’re baked off their asses. Everything was funny, and we had tears streaming down our face from laughing about so many different things. One joke flowed into the next.
We continued debating on going to the art museum. I was content in my comfy chair, but my girlfriend really wanted to see art come to life. Another of us was starving and we all realized how hungry we actually were. I’m not used to being hungry on acid, but I came to realize how clean this trip was and that my stomach isn’t in pain like it normally is on a dose of acid. Barbeque chicken was a blast of flavor. Ranch was even better.
Throughout all of this, we were loading lots of whippits. The perfect thing about nitrous is that you control how powerful the experience is. The longer you hold it in, the more visuals are potentiated, the more auditory hallucinations you get, and the more dissociated you become. If I don’t want to have a powerful experience, I only hold it in a few seconds. It’s really the perfect thing for acid. The two are synergistic in a way that no other drug could be. Once you’ve dosed other drugs, you’re stuck with that dose and there’s no going back. The whippit is short, so if you experience a whippit that’s too powerful, it’ll be over within 60 seconds. When everyone inhales their balloon together, you are caught in an instant. It’s a shared moment and that 60 seconds becomes incredible. That portion of the song that’s playing, that visualization that you get when you close your eyes - that’s an experience that you have and can relinquish. No words need to be said at the end of a whippit. A simple “wow…” is all that’s required and everyone knows exactly what you mean.
The best thing about a group of people you really enjoy the company of is that conversations flow into one another with absolutely no effort. We would talk about past shows and raves, music, school and life. We‘d discuss future plans for things we wanted to do together. Someone would say something and it would become instantly hilarious and we would have no idea why. The confusion of it would make us laugh harder until tears were running down our cheeks and we couldn’t breathe. We must be adding years to our life; this is therapy, and it’s so healthy.
We discussed the art museum again, but our hopes were shattered upon realization that it was closing earlier than we had expected. Shoot. I think it was at this moment that I realized today was going to be the day that I would finally candyflip. The setting was perfect. I was having an amazing trip on amazing acid with amazing people. We were all in good headspaces and we still had at least 3-5 hours left in the trip with no plans for the rest of the evening. I convinced my two close friends who lived in the the apartment to do it with me and after some brief discussing, it was finalized. We loaded more piracetam, alpha lipoic acid, and vitamin C. At 7:00pm, I dropped 110mg molly, and redosed with another 20-30mg about 30 minutes later. It’s my favorite way to dose because you start with your initial come up and just as you’re beginning to roll, that last little bit pushes you just a little further.
Normally when I’ve dosed my molly, I’m anxious. Rightly so, I’m just anticipating it because I’m going from being sober and I know that the molly comeup can be a little hard at times. That’s where acid really helps. You’re already high and having fun and enjoying everything that acid has to offer you and you sort of forget about the molly, and before you know it, you’ve come up and you’re rolling balls while the psychedelic images on the computer are warping and shifting. 110mg of just molly has never felt like this. It’s wonderful. When they say that acid and molly potentiate each other, they aren’t lying.
The roll was pure euphoria. I had blasted off this earth and I could easily let everything go. Acid can be difficult at times, and molly is the vessel that sends you to that exact place you want to be, even if you didn’t know you wanted to be there. Molly brings out the best parts of acid, and vice versa. I’ve always thought acid and nitrous was wonderful. Acid and molly are indescribable. I spent the next few hours sinking into the couches, talking with my friends, and giving out hugs (I’m not normally a hugger). I wanted everyone to be as happy as I was, and I wanted to share everything that was awesome for me with other people. Music became an experience, not just something that I really enjoy in different ways on different drugs. Closed eye visuals were dictated by the beat and the melody. The music commanded what I saw, and I saw spirals, patterns, and colors that are normally wonderful on acid, but the novelty of the visuals made me roll harder because of the MDMA. If you ever smell a Vick’s Inhaler on MDMA and you feel that rush that hits you and nearly floors you, the acid visuals do the same thing for MDMA. Psychedelia becomes much more novel and the innocence of MDMA allows you to experience the LSD from a virgin mind.
The old adage is “what goes up must come down,” and when I felt the roll fleeting my brain I became somewhat anxious. I think that this is the time that I would normally re-dose, not accepting the fact that I should come back to sobriety. It’s really the only problem I have with molly: the comedown can be much harsher than many other drugs. Even cocaine. I decided against the re-dose of molly, but remembered that we had about 140mg of ketamine between us and I had never kitty-flipped before. Today was a day for exploration and new experiences, and so we decided to cut up some small bumps on a mirror and go for it. We roll at most once a month, this was the first time we ever rolled together, and we didn’t know when the next time we’d get this opportunity so it was perfect to finally try this.
We piled onto the couch, coming down from the roll and definitely feeling the molly comedown was nearly upon us. We were falling from our peak, tumbling through the stratosphere. It was here that we took in our first line of the K, about 20-25mg. The two other rollers took two lines at once, going for a little harder kitty-flip from the start, and jumped to about 50mgs. I was content with the low dose, as this was only my second time with K. Bumping the K was a fantastic decision!
About 10 minutes later, the K started to take effect. I really don’t know how to describe ketamine other than “chill.” I had no desire to stand. I really liked mellow trance music. We tried to describe the feeling of the low-dose of K to each other and couldn’t come up with anything. It’s like being drunk but not drunk. It’s like a lot of things but it’s not like those things. K is K, and there’s nothing like it yet there’s a lot that’s like it. You can’t use words to describe it, because you find something that seems like it works yet there’s a “but.” K is like <something>, but not at all. My friend said that K is a punctuation mark. It really is. My roll came back a little, and we all realized that the acid was still giving us some good visuals. We were now falling in a combination of LSD, MDMA, and Ketamine, and what a combo it is! My anxieties of coming off a roll were alleviated completely. I was not falling as hard as I normally would at this point in the roll. It was much easier for me to realize that the day had to eventually come to an end and I was perfectly content with it. I was content with everything and there really wasn’t much that could possibly bother me at this point.
Nitrous amplified the effects of the K mostly, but lightly intensified the visuals of the LSD. I was basically stuck to the couch with my close friends and we were in the exact same place together. It was wonderful and we sat in utter silence to a mellow track just playing back the day in our heads. We somehow knew what each other was thinking. We were having the same thoughts together and no words needed to be spoken. The ketamine was the parachute that helped us return to ground level in a pleasant way, not a huge crash. The track faded away with the realization that it was time to get up, collect our thoughts, and bask in the afterglow as we left. There was no bad comedown; we were high but not high. We were at an elevated baseline. I was tired, my brain was a little scattered but in my mind I knew something great had just occurred. I was still finding ways to describe it.
I had shared this experience with my friends. We bonded together. I felt like I closed a chapter of my life with this experience. I completed the candyflip and the kitty-flip; two things that I had always had a desire to do but had never found the right time. Two experiences crossed off my drug bucket list in one amazing day. It was perfection, but yet that somehow doesn’t quite fit it. “Perfect” doesn’t do it justice. We did nothing, and yet it was more than anything. It was a total journey through music, our friendships, and our minds. I’d totally do it again someday.
Postlogue:
I got a lot out of this whole experience. I go through phases with LSD. I’ll go through an acid phase and do acid every few weeks for awhile until I make a breakthrough and then I'll quit for a period of time. This trip was a major breakthrough for me. I said earlier I felt like I closed a chapter in my book, and it still feels so true. LSD helped me accomplish something very special. It’s an experience I’ll never forget. Everything seemed so perfect: the dose, the timing of each drug, the setting, and the people. Never once did I feel overpowered. The candyflip and kittyflip were more than I could possibly imagine.
I finally understand what Alexander Shulgin meant when he said he felt like a “citizen of the universe.” I’ve never had that after MDMA until today.
The best part of it all is that I didn’t feel like I ever came down off the trip. There was just this perfect transition from outer space to being grounded again. LSD provided a launch pad, a perfect place to start. MDMA was the craft that sent me to the moon. And ketamine was the parachute that slowed down the what I thought was going to be a crazy crash down to Earth. It was the perfect three course meal among friends.
The last thing I came to terms with over these past few weeks with LSD (and a little coke here and there) and was set in stone by this trip in particular is that there’s only one thing that truly matters in the grand scheme of your substance use: who you’re with. Your drugs can be pure, you can be at the best show in the world, and you can have everything planned to a T, but the people you’re with make the trip. Nothing else.
Yesterday, I sat on a couch in an apartment with some of the best people I know. I did absolutely nothing, and it was more than I could have dreamed.
.