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LSD - Experienced - Absolute Terror and Desperation

S

Shlumpeet

Bluelighter
Joined
May 4, 2008
Messages
260
Location
Birmingham
My buddy called me with good news, our friend was going to pick up some acid. Of course I was down. I gave her $60 for six hits. I get them, later that night I took three. I decided to take another ten minutes later, after all, I've taken 6 before. No big deal.

I start coming up, usual come up. Eventually it starts to get intense though. Really intense. I'm enjoying the trip but I don't seem to have the euphoria. Crazy visuals, people from the television are popping out. My ceiling tiles are morphing horizontally, and then vertically. Texture of objects are changing in such different patterns yet in such a natural way. I start to think about my life, as usual on acid. I have so much potential. I start thinking about everything I could be doing, places I could be going. Hell yeah, I'm gonna ask out all the hot chicks at my school; of course I'll say yes, cause I have every bit of confidence possible. I'm gonna start busting my ass in school. I wanna learn things. Be knowledgeable. I WANNA KNOW IT ALL

I start talking to my friends on AIM. A rather intelligent buddy of mine gets on, I'm very excited. I begin to tell him about how much my life is about to change and how much I wanted to share this beauty and wonder with him. I'm typing frantically, my thoughts racing.

Then I start to notice my heart rate. My body is more worked up than a marathon runner's. I was concerned so I decided to lay down and hopefully it will get better. I look at my clock, I look at my TV, THIS IS SO FUCKING INTENSE. I NEVER KNEW IT COULD BE LIKE THIS!!! I felt like I needed to escape it, like I needed a break from the intensity, for just a moment.

My heart is still going nuts. I figure if this keeps up I'm going to have to go warm my dad upstairs about it.

So yeah, my dumb ass freaks out and goes up stairs and frantically awakes my parents. I tell them I'm on acid and I need some fucking water or I'm going to die. My step mom gets on the phone, I remember thinking it was with her parents but I'm going to assume now that it was the hospital. I'm babbling about everything that is on my mind. Holy shit, they're going to find out all my secrets. My dad's going to find out that I care more about myself than anyone else in my family! If I live through this I need to move far, far away.

For some reason I start to believe I'm dying. I need to stay alive! But how? Either way, this needs to end with a positive mind set. I try to start to think of peaceful things, of positive things. Positive...negative...positive...negative...physical...emotional...physical...emotional... I need to find the extreme. I need to find the most positive thing possible before I die. Happy...water...I need water...I NEED WATER FOR LIFE! YES! LIFE! Here it is, the moment of life or death. LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFEEEEE I scream. It's not working, I'm still going to die.

Ambulance a bunch of huge dudes arrive, come in my parents room.

Maybe I need to say the opposite? DEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAATHHHHH. Need to yell something offensive. FUUUUUUUUUUCCCK. I need more time, more time to think of the word that can keep me alive. I ask the huge dudes for more time. I need a year, 10 years, more time than I have right now. They're laughing at me. I begin to curse at them for finding humor in my desperation.

So I've come to the conclusion that I've sent myself permanently into a realm of exploration into the human mind. I'm on a totally new level of consciousness totally uncompromisable to the assholes that surround me. They're going to kill me. Why, I don't know, but they're going to kill me because I've gone too far and they can't handle having me around.

I go into the ambulance. Is this real? They shove the catheter down my dick, luckily I don't remember feeling the pain. Try watching that on acid. This can't be real. I finally stop yelling, but I'm still sure I'm dying. One by one the lights in the ambulance go off. This is it, this is where I die...I'm still alive though?


I wake up in the hospital the next day. I don't think I'm in a real hospital, or that I was in a real ambulance that night. I ask the people around how to get out of here. I finally find out what really happened, and I was put in a two week rehab the same day.


EDIT: It's almost eight months later and I'm still remembering parts of this trip. One thing I remember is when I was in my parents room and the ambulance people came, and I was constantly asking for more time to live. It was as if every bit of my reality was slipping away. Every bit of science I've ever learned about, everything of my very reality was going away, yet it was all in my face. My family and the ambulance people were all living in their normal, secure lives. And everything I could ever imagine as reality, every bit of science, was all going through my head at once.

It's very hard to explain, or remember for that matter. It was without a doubt the worst night of my life (unless you can consider the night my mother died, but I don't think any emotion could compare to what happened that night). Not only was I very terrified during the whole thing, I am still to this day utterly embarrassed.

I'm going to trip later in life, that's for sure, but for now, I have a lot of stuff I need to work out. I need to build a better relationship with my father, do good in school (starting college) and start saving my money. Once I feel I'm more secure with my life I very much look forward to tripping again.

Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_lsd
substancecode_lysergamides
explevel_experienced
exptype_negative
exptype_difficult
exptype_disaster
roacode_sublingual
 
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Yep, that's what 4 hits of acid can do to you man. Next time just take the tabs one by one.

Why did they put a catheter in your dick??
 
Jesus.. well, set & setting become all the more relevant once again. When it gets so intense that you wanna escape it, you had better hope there isn't someone around who might not understand how to treat the situation right. I mean if you're having a bad trip, having the paramedics come could potentially freak you out a lot more than it did. But, no doubt, you already know all this.

It's all about chances. So you fucked up. You could have gotten through the trip, maybe, but I think it's always important to not underestimate the incredibly power of the chemicals you're dealing with. You only have one brain, one life. Frequent tripping likely becomes less enlightening and more recreational and/or damaging.
 
id rather spend a bad trip by myself in my own hell then to worry anyone else about it 99% of the time, especially with something as safe as acid is, youll be fine, unless your bent on hurting yourself or others, which happens maybe 1% of the time, IME..., its good that your ok, but damn man dont take acid for granted, maybe stop for a good couple years..Ive stopped hallucingenics all together, too much acid back in high school

have some benzos or something on hand especially if something like this happens, Ill know that for next time, then youll always have a 'safe house' if shit goes hay wire.
 
I've always wanted to try acid, but it's stories like this that make me change my mind. In any case, I'm glad you're okay! It's important to have sober friends around, as well as some good sleeping meds like benzos for the occasional bad trip. And because you never know the potency of what you're getting, start with a dose suitable for a person, not a horse :)

J/K
 
I can get why stories like this would be a good warning but that doesn't mean you can't just approach things responsibly... OK maybe if you know you handle a lot of things irresponsibly and you're known to make stupid mistakes you could protect yourself by never starting with anything that demands respectful handling.
Honestly you don't have to be afraid that you will do something you really don't want to do, right? The only thing you have to do is remember what is most important to you and in this case it's keeping yourself safe when taking a powerful drug. Now if you read up on the matter and get to know the ground rules of set and setting, and work your way up with every different unknown-dosed drugbatch (that means: don't calculate in number of pills or blotters, calculate in micrograms or milligrams - and if you don't know how much is in it try lower doses until you feel OK to assume a certain dosage!)... if you hold yourself to these kinds of harm reductions you can reduce the risk to the point of it being all right to take, in my opinion.
On the other hand, it's hard to know if you know enough to keep safe and eventually everyone can slip up, then it depends if you can accept the consequences and learn from experience. I have been in uncomfortable situations but NOT really unsafe ones, I've had 'difficult experiences' but not train wrecks and I make sure. Personally I find it rewarding to venture out into the world and learn from the good and also from the bad, that includes tripping.

It's your choice, if you want to never take the slightest risk because you value being alive too much that's OK - then I wouldn't touch any drug except maybe the mild herbal ones.
I'd rather not take the risk of not living my life to a certain extent, and venture into the unknown, but responsibly.
 
I woke up perfectly fine. During the trip I thought there was no way I could ever be the same again, even before things went wrong.

And the dude that doesn't wanna try acid because of stories like this - don't let me scare you! I was thinking totally illogically. I just didn't know how to handle the situation, I tried to escape from it which is what started causing problems.
 
Set & Setting!
4 doses!
U sure didn't PLAN Ur TRIP!

LSD is sacrament 2 me has to be well-planned or crazy shit happens.

My last trip was unplanned, I really blew it on the phone getting crazy on a business deal!
 
Sometimes it doesn't matter how well you "plan" it I've found. Respect is a hard lesson to learn from LSD.
 
You generally plan for acid by not dropping more than 1 or 2 hits of a new batch. I don't think I've ever read about anyone going to the hospital from a half hit of acid. You can always work your way up, but once you've taken too much, you're often out to lunch and there's no stopping you.

Also don't take acid with your parents upstairs. :p

But, then again, I had one really bad psychedelic overdose and that's kept me from seriously using any psychedelics since then.
 
n3ophy7e said:
Yep, that's what 4 hits of acid can do to you man. Next time just take the tabs one by one.

Why did they put a catheter in your dick??
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I was going to ask the same thing... then I realized that for whatever reason, they ALWAYS put in a catheter when you're claiming to have overdosed on drugs. It's like "catheter first, questions later". I suspect it's partially to try to teach you a lesson by being as unpleasant as possible.

Man, I've had some epic freakouts but I've never actually called an ambulance. I've certainly thought about it really hard, but I was always able to stop myself. That sucks man. :(

That's classic though... feeling like you're never going to come down and/or die. Amazing how logic can fly right out the window no matter how well you "know your stuff".
 
I was gonna call BS on this story when I read the catheter part, but it seems other people are familiar with this so I'll let it slide. :)

Next time don't trip anywhere near your parents. And if you do, lock the door.

The most important trick:

BREATHE!

It always calms anxiety whenever you feel you're going down that dark dark road.
 
Xorkoth said:
I was going to ask the same thing... then I realized that for whatever reason, they ALWAYS put in a catheter when you're claiming to have overdosed on drugs. It's like "catheter first, questions later". I suspect it's partially to try to teach you a lesson by being as unpleasant as possible.

Man, I've had some epic freakouts but I've never actually called an ambulance. I've certainly thought about it really hard, but I was always able to stop myself. That sucks man. :(

That's classic though... feeling like you're never going to come down and/or die. Amazing how logic can fly right out the window no matter how well you "know your stuff".
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Yeah, the thought of the catheter still haunts me.

And yes, the ambulance was stupid. I even knew not to call the damn ambulance but my parents are dumb as shit about drugs. All I needed help for was water and getting calmed down. I didn't think I was dying until the ambulance came. I don't even think I was peaking until all the guys from the ambulance came to my house...not fun.

white_magic said:
Have you tripped since? How have your parents/friends treated you?
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I've taken shrooms since, twice, both were very minor trips. I've done DXM once if you want to count that, which was a very enlightening experience.

My dad treats me just like he did before I guess...I'm always out smoking pot and he's trying to control it and ignore it at the same time...

NUKE said:
You generally plan for acid by not dropping more than 1 or 2 hits of a new batch. I don't think I've ever read about anyone going to the hospital from a half hit of acid. You can always work your way up, but once you've taken too much, you're often out to lunch and there's no stopping you.
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Yeah, I know :(. I live in Alabama though, we're used to shitty drugs. Before that I would always take 4-6 hits of acid, I just wasn't aware this stuff was the real deal.

But HOLY SHIT that was the best acid hits ever. Ever.
 
I have had some really bad trips like what you described. I was on tri-cyclic anti-depressant called Tofranil (imipramine) and Lithium and I had not tripped since starting the new meds so I took two hits of white blotter and I went fucking crazy as soon as it hit. I remember screaming "what the fuck!" as I bent over and grabbed the bottom of a couch and flipped it over like I had super strength!
It got much worse and every thought or spoken word seemed to get caught in a circle of repetion until there were thousands of sounds and words repeating in my mind and I could'nt stop them.

I went outsise of the appartment and started kicking and punching cars in the parking lot thinking that if I could cause myself pain I could escape from the intensity of the mind-fuck I was in.

At one point I saw a huge pyramid of light that I believed was God and it was speaking to me in many voices at once.
I was thinking about walking out into the street so the oncoming traffic would kill me and my friend had to stop me from doing so.

Next thing I remember was being dropped off at my parents house and my parents said I was speaking gibberish and started counting out loud and talking about math equations.

They took me to the ER and the doctor told them that I was psychotic and I may not recover from it, he said that I had to be Baker Acted and would be admitted into the psych ward.

I was in isolation with nothing in the room but a security camera watching me.
Finally I started to feel better and the next day I was ok but had to stay in the hospital for 3 days under observation before the pdoc would release me.

I was told later that the LSD had reacted to the psychotropic meds I was taking.

Crazy shit.
 
Ive eaten my share of psychedelics and have had absolute disaster trips where I felt disconnected from everyone I loved, isolated from God and had made the ultimate mistake and I was going to suffer eternally. Other times ive had the feeling of perfectness, absolute euphoria but in the end I think psychedelics just mess with your head. Ive tried pretty much everything including some RC's and after its all been said and done ive learned a lot of lessons and overcome crazy mindfucks but I dont see much good coming from them anymore. They can be the best time, the worst time, or even seem to bring you into harmony with everything but the question is what good is coming of it? Are you unlocking the secrets to the universe or interperting situations from a psychotic point of view?

And you can be the most psychologicaly sound person and have the worst trip that will influence you for months. There are so many factors that comes into the experience, set, setting, mind set, how your life is going, things you focus on, whether your friends know how to diffuse the situation, good or bad music, positive movie or movie that is interperted as evil.
 
Something I did one time, and I would recommend to a lot of people.

If you are in your room or whatever, just tape a sign to the door on your side of it that says something to the effect of "everything is just fine"

My friend on DXM was starting to kinda wig out and he saw it and felt ok. Like he didnt need to leave the room.

Same with myself. I am pretty under control. I've never had a true bad trip or a breakdown. But its almost like some heavenly body put that sign there for you.

Worst thing is to freak out and inform parents or others. Because you WILL be alright eventually.

But hey man just be smart and have a sitter next time.
 
delsymfan said:
Something I did one time, and I would recommend to a lot of people.

If you are in your room or whatever, just tape a sign to the door on your side of it that says something to the effect of "everything is just fine"

My friend on DXM was starting to kinda wig out and he saw it and felt ok. Like he didnt need to leave the room.

Same with myself. I am pretty under control. I've never had a true bad trip or a breakdown. But its almost like some heavenly body put that sign there for you.

Worst thing is to freak out and inform parents or others. Because you WILL be alright eventually.

But hey man just be smart and have a sitter next time.
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I was thinking about writing something like that. I was looking for anything, I was gonna write it on my wall, I didn't really care at the moment. I tried writing it in chap stick but it didn't work.

But man, before the freakout I came to some pretty amazing realizations about my life. If only things would've gone right...
 
What I always wonder is How will I deal with my kids when they're freaking out on acid in my house and all I want to do is fuck my wife and go to work in the morning not deal with this shit.

I suppose I will just yell at them and tell them to get the fuck out of my room and go to bed or something.

Maybe tell them to put on their ipod and go lay down on the couch. Here son, this is the liquid tension experiment. They play guitars.
 
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