harraser
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 3, 2001
- Messages
- 2,091
Acid, 4th time, Insanity and Hospitalisation
*heres the story of how I went nuts on a couple of gettos, names have been changed to protect the innocent*
Around about 2.30pm on a sunny day somewhere in June or July. Me, my best friend M, both of us 16yo, and M’s little brother N, 14. It was to be N’s first time on acid. We had managed to get our hands on some Gettofixes, about 1cm Square and when still in a sheet they make a picture of the little wizard from the asterix comics…cute. I had been warned that these were strong trips but it didn’t really worry me, Id never had problems on acid before so I guess I was a little over confident. Me and M dropped two each and N had one. We were at M’s house; he lived with his dad and his grandmother at the time. M’s dad is a long time heroin junkie so he didn’t mind us taking drugs in his house, his Nan is a different story but what was she gonna do?
Anyway for the first hour or so we just sat around talking and laughing at shit while the trips came on, I was used to trips taking about an hour to start but these came on in about 20 minutes and started to hit me fairly hard. To this day N insists that they didn’t work for him but the way he kept running into the room with shit like marble ashtrays and just saying “Look at it, look at the lines” sort of has me doubting it. After a bit of piss-farting around M’s dad suggested we go to M’s mums house for a bit, She’s a long time addict as well so its no big deal doing drugs at her place. We all jumped in the car, it was my first time being in a car on acid, and started off. In the car I was watching a spider crawl around on my leg, a big brown hairy fucker (the spider, not my leg), but I just assumed it want real so it didn’t worry me and I just watched it crawl around, until M’s dad turned around to say something to me but said instead “Jesus Christ you’ve got a big fucking spider on your leg” to which I replied with “What the fuck!! Its real? Shit, stop the fucking car!!! Fuck” and I jumped out of the car and brushed the spider off me. The rest of the car trip was fairly uneventful but I was having a little trouble keeping up with the surroundings as I looked out the window, I kept getting confused as to where we were (on a road I travel every day) and where we were going.
When we got to J’s (M’s mum) we sat around for a while playing Super Mario 2 on the SNES but I kept falling in the holes coz I was watching the last Mario in the line instead of the one at the front. Um this boring part of the story is getting a bit long so ill try and cut to the chase. Next we went across the road to this guys house and all I remember of that is J saying over and over again “lets all go to Luna park” and then someone else would say “nah we cant afford it” and it was said again and again like five times. Odd. (For all the Americans out there, Luna Park is an amusement park in Melbourne)
Now comes the good part
once again we got in M’s dads car and went for a drive, I think it was to get some weed. Anyway when we got there N got out and went around the corner to go to the guys house and me, M, his dad and his other little brother R were left in the car. I was in the back seat and R was next to me, at the time he was only a baby and he kept turning his head toward me and looking at me and I got it in my head that he was about to vomit on me so I turned his head away, this happened about ten times. Then M said something to me, I have no idea what he said, I couldn’t understand a word of it but I replied with “Blue GreenBlue…..Red” colors were all I could think about. So Im guessing M just gave up on talking to me for a while. But a bit later he said something to me again, I have no idea what it actually was but I interpreted it as “fuck, they’ve got us. Should we run?” or something along those lines. I looked out the back window of the car and there was a white van pulling up behind us and I instantly knew it was cops (it wasn’t but that’s what I thought) so I tried to get out and run but the door wouldn’t open, so I locked it and tried again, it wouldn’t open, so I unlocked and it finally opened and I got out and walked away.
From here on in the order of events is just a vague idea; I’m really not sure of what happened where so just bear with me.
· I crossed a road and behind me I felt something that was about to grab me, I spun and punched but it had run round behind me as I spun so I missed. I spun and punched again but it stayed behind me. I thought “its too fast” I spun again and again; throwing punches all the while and always hitting nothing but air. Eventually this exhausted me and I gave up. I remember thinking, “let it take me.” So I just walked on (and of course promptly forgot the whole thing had ever happened)
· I was walking past three guys standing at a car chating and I got the idea in my head that one had been following me. I walked up to him screaming, “I know what you’re doing. Stop fucking following me” and more things along those general lines. I don’t know why I stopped and walked on, or why the guys didn’t beat my head in. I’m just lucky I guess.
· I wandered into a block of flats, somehow getting it into my head that I was in a space ship that was about to crash. I desperately hammered at the emergency pod buttons (numbers on the letterbox’s) but no doors would open. I was almost blubbering in fear coz Id forgotten the code to get into the emergency escape pods. I tried punching in a window to get into the emergency pod hatch (it was the window of a flat) but it wouldn’t break. Then I guess I moved on.
· I went through one bit where I could feel time rushing forward faster and faster toward a point that was near and I knew that the world would depend on a decision that I made when that time came. I also knew that everything that had ever happened in the history of the world had happened to prepare the world to make me and to prepare me to make this decision. It was a choice between white and black. White was symbolized by a circle and black was just black, no shape no form just everything black and empty. I could also see the outcomes of my decision on myself. If I chose black in the future I pictured myself as a guy in a black suit, slick moustache just looking good healthy wealthy and I knew it was a really sort of oily person that Id be. If I chose white I pictured myself as an old man in a rocking chair. I had brought peace to the world and a lady next to me said “you can rest now” and I died. I was happy. In the end I chose not to choose and let the world work itself out. Then I forgot
· I remember punching in two windows, one with my left hand and one with my right, but I'm not entirely sure of why I did it. (I don’t remember this but Social Services told me afterward that the windows had been in a doctors surgery and the doctor had come out to help me and Id tried to beat him up too) then a car came. It was angular parking on the street that I was on (you know the kind of parking where the cars are facing the path) and when the car parked facing me I knew that all the blood all over me was a premonition and that the car was about to hit me and I was about to die. The car turned out to be a police car and I remember the face of a cop in a flouro yellow jacket screaming in my face, fucked if I know what he said though. Then the cops layed me down in the back of the divvy van, I was too messed up to know that I was supposed to be sitting up. While lying in the back of the cop car what I experienced was four people standing around me trying to position a train so it would smash into me (I was across the road from a train line at the time so I guess that’s where this idea came from) anyway they had the train frozen so it had been rushing at its regular speed and they’d frozen it so as soon as they released it the train would be going at top speed and would annihilate me. They kept on moving it a centimeter or two to the left and then they’d be about to release it when one of them would say something coz it wasn’t exactly straight so they’d move it a bit to the right and so on. I was lying on my back and the train was somehow above me about to smash into me front on. Then they closed the doors of the cop car.
I’m not sure if I passed out from blood loss or fear or if the cops knocked me out but from here on in its all in my head. I don’t remember arriving at the hospital, or the ride in the cop car on the way there. And just like before I still have only a vague idea of the sequence of events here
· While in my unconscious state I remember seeing a bunch of people standing around me in baseball uniforms with bats and gloves etc and one of them was my friend Andrew and they were all trying to talk to me and I could almost understand them but the voices were really chocked and I couldn’t quite make out what they said. But Andrew was smiling and that made me feel better.
· There was a woman standing next to my bed and I knew the world was going to die if we didn’t “procreate” that was the exact word that I used when I thought it. There was no lust involved at all, just a desire to continue the species.
· I was sitting in a bed and I had pissed myself and my chemistry teacher was there. I didn’t want him to find out I had pissed myself but I couldn’t hide the smell. This really distressed me. At some point my chem. Teacher turned into a friend of mines dad, go figure.
Now I’m waking up. Standing around me is five people and one of them is saying “Anthony, can you hear me Anthony?” in this really irritating voice, he looks reptilian and his skin had a sort of smoke coming off it.
At this point I’m still going in and out of “dreams”. I feel I cant move and go into a dream of how my body has been used as a human crash test dummy all my life and all my memories were implanted to keep me calm and nothing of my life was real, and they had woken me up now to tell me that my last crash test went wrong and now I’m dieing.
I stammer “what the fucks happening? Why can’t I move?” and I sweat a bit more until a security guard yells at me for using bad language. Then the doctor (who no longer looks reptilian) tells me that Ive been strapped down to the bed so I don’t hurt anyone, I ask him to take the straps off and he says he wont coz he’s afraid I might hurt someone. I beg, on the verge of tears, for him to take the straps off so he makes me promise Ill stay calm and then he takes the straps off. It was an IMENSE relief to find that I could still move.
Anyway I woke up, both my hands caked in my own blood, I’m not ashamed to admit I had pissed myself, and I had cuts all over my arms, only one of which was actually bad (the scar is about four inches long and now, two years on, I can still feel the dip in my muscle from how deep it was). My friends had looked for me for two hours when I ran off, and when I called them from hospital the next morning they (eventually) came and got me and brought me a change of clothes coz mine were all covered in blood and urine and the doctors had cut off my favorite pantera top
It was a week before my mum found out what had happened. Social Services rang her and told her that Id assaulted eight people, one of which was a guy in a service station who Id tried to hit with his own spanner, before punching in a window and when I went to hospital they’d tested my blood and found over a hundred dollars worth of speed in my system (Id never touched speed in my life)
There are parts of this story I’ve left out coz what I experienced was too personal or coz I simply can’t remember it. But hows that for a fucked up story
*heres the story of how I went nuts on a couple of gettos, names have been changed to protect the innocent*
Around about 2.30pm on a sunny day somewhere in June or July. Me, my best friend M, both of us 16yo, and M’s little brother N, 14. It was to be N’s first time on acid. We had managed to get our hands on some Gettofixes, about 1cm Square and when still in a sheet they make a picture of the little wizard from the asterix comics…cute. I had been warned that these were strong trips but it didn’t really worry me, Id never had problems on acid before so I guess I was a little over confident. Me and M dropped two each and N had one. We were at M’s house; he lived with his dad and his grandmother at the time. M’s dad is a long time heroin junkie so he didn’t mind us taking drugs in his house, his Nan is a different story but what was she gonna do?
Anyway for the first hour or so we just sat around talking and laughing at shit while the trips came on, I was used to trips taking about an hour to start but these came on in about 20 minutes and started to hit me fairly hard. To this day N insists that they didn’t work for him but the way he kept running into the room with shit like marble ashtrays and just saying “Look at it, look at the lines” sort of has me doubting it. After a bit of piss-farting around M’s dad suggested we go to M’s mums house for a bit, She’s a long time addict as well so its no big deal doing drugs at her place. We all jumped in the car, it was my first time being in a car on acid, and started off. In the car I was watching a spider crawl around on my leg, a big brown hairy fucker (the spider, not my leg), but I just assumed it want real so it didn’t worry me and I just watched it crawl around, until M’s dad turned around to say something to me but said instead “Jesus Christ you’ve got a big fucking spider on your leg” to which I replied with “What the fuck!! Its real? Shit, stop the fucking car!!! Fuck” and I jumped out of the car and brushed the spider off me. The rest of the car trip was fairly uneventful but I was having a little trouble keeping up with the surroundings as I looked out the window, I kept getting confused as to where we were (on a road I travel every day) and where we were going.
When we got to J’s (M’s mum) we sat around for a while playing Super Mario 2 on the SNES but I kept falling in the holes coz I was watching the last Mario in the line instead of the one at the front. Um this boring part of the story is getting a bit long so ill try and cut to the chase. Next we went across the road to this guys house and all I remember of that is J saying over and over again “lets all go to Luna park” and then someone else would say “nah we cant afford it” and it was said again and again like five times. Odd. (For all the Americans out there, Luna Park is an amusement park in Melbourne)
Now comes the good part
once again we got in M’s dads car and went for a drive, I think it was to get some weed. Anyway when we got there N got out and went around the corner to go to the guys house and me, M, his dad and his other little brother R were left in the car. I was in the back seat and R was next to me, at the time he was only a baby and he kept turning his head toward me and looking at me and I got it in my head that he was about to vomit on me so I turned his head away, this happened about ten times. Then M said something to me, I have no idea what he said, I couldn’t understand a word of it but I replied with “Blue GreenBlue…..Red” colors were all I could think about. So Im guessing M just gave up on talking to me for a while. But a bit later he said something to me again, I have no idea what it actually was but I interpreted it as “fuck, they’ve got us. Should we run?” or something along those lines. I looked out the back window of the car and there was a white van pulling up behind us and I instantly knew it was cops (it wasn’t but that’s what I thought) so I tried to get out and run but the door wouldn’t open, so I locked it and tried again, it wouldn’t open, so I unlocked and it finally opened and I got out and walked away.From here on in the order of events is just a vague idea; I’m really not sure of what happened where so just bear with me.
· I crossed a road and behind me I felt something that was about to grab me, I spun and punched but it had run round behind me as I spun so I missed. I spun and punched again but it stayed behind me. I thought “its too fast” I spun again and again; throwing punches all the while and always hitting nothing but air. Eventually this exhausted me and I gave up. I remember thinking, “let it take me.” So I just walked on (and of course promptly forgot the whole thing had ever happened)
· I was walking past three guys standing at a car chating and I got the idea in my head that one had been following me. I walked up to him screaming, “I know what you’re doing. Stop fucking following me” and more things along those general lines. I don’t know why I stopped and walked on, or why the guys didn’t beat my head in. I’m just lucky I guess.
· I wandered into a block of flats, somehow getting it into my head that I was in a space ship that was about to crash. I desperately hammered at the emergency pod buttons (numbers on the letterbox’s) but no doors would open. I was almost blubbering in fear coz Id forgotten the code to get into the emergency escape pods. I tried punching in a window to get into the emergency pod hatch (it was the window of a flat) but it wouldn’t break. Then I guess I moved on.
· I went through one bit where I could feel time rushing forward faster and faster toward a point that was near and I knew that the world would depend on a decision that I made when that time came. I also knew that everything that had ever happened in the history of the world had happened to prepare the world to make me and to prepare me to make this decision. It was a choice between white and black. White was symbolized by a circle and black was just black, no shape no form just everything black and empty. I could also see the outcomes of my decision on myself. If I chose black in the future I pictured myself as a guy in a black suit, slick moustache just looking good healthy wealthy and I knew it was a really sort of oily person that Id be. If I chose white I pictured myself as an old man in a rocking chair. I had brought peace to the world and a lady next to me said “you can rest now” and I died. I was happy. In the end I chose not to choose and let the world work itself out. Then I forgot
· I remember punching in two windows, one with my left hand and one with my right, but I'm not entirely sure of why I did it. (I don’t remember this but Social Services told me afterward that the windows had been in a doctors surgery and the doctor had come out to help me and Id tried to beat him up too) then a car came. It was angular parking on the street that I was on (you know the kind of parking where the cars are facing the path) and when the car parked facing me I knew that all the blood all over me was a premonition and that the car was about to hit me and I was about to die. The car turned out to be a police car and I remember the face of a cop in a flouro yellow jacket screaming in my face, fucked if I know what he said though. Then the cops layed me down in the back of the divvy van, I was too messed up to know that I was supposed to be sitting up. While lying in the back of the cop car what I experienced was four people standing around me trying to position a train so it would smash into me (I was across the road from a train line at the time so I guess that’s where this idea came from) anyway they had the train frozen so it had been rushing at its regular speed and they’d frozen it so as soon as they released it the train would be going at top speed and would annihilate me. They kept on moving it a centimeter or two to the left and then they’d be about to release it when one of them would say something coz it wasn’t exactly straight so they’d move it a bit to the right and so on. I was lying on my back and the train was somehow above me about to smash into me front on. Then they closed the doors of the cop car.
I’m not sure if I passed out from blood loss or fear or if the cops knocked me out but from here on in its all in my head. I don’t remember arriving at the hospital, or the ride in the cop car on the way there. And just like before I still have only a vague idea of the sequence of events here
· While in my unconscious state I remember seeing a bunch of people standing around me in baseball uniforms with bats and gloves etc and one of them was my friend Andrew and they were all trying to talk to me and I could almost understand them but the voices were really chocked and I couldn’t quite make out what they said. But Andrew was smiling and that made me feel better.
· There was a woman standing next to my bed and I knew the world was going to die if we didn’t “procreate” that was the exact word that I used when I thought it. There was no lust involved at all, just a desire to continue the species.
· I was sitting in a bed and I had pissed myself and my chemistry teacher was there. I didn’t want him to find out I had pissed myself but I couldn’t hide the smell. This really distressed me. At some point my chem. Teacher turned into a friend of mines dad, go figure.
Now I’m waking up. Standing around me is five people and one of them is saying “Anthony, can you hear me Anthony?” in this really irritating voice, he looks reptilian and his skin had a sort of smoke coming off it.
At this point I’m still going in and out of “dreams”. I feel I cant move and go into a dream of how my body has been used as a human crash test dummy all my life and all my memories were implanted to keep me calm and nothing of my life was real, and they had woken me up now to tell me that my last crash test went wrong and now I’m dieing.
I stammer “what the fucks happening? Why can’t I move?” and I sweat a bit more until a security guard yells at me for using bad language. Then the doctor (who no longer looks reptilian) tells me that Ive been strapped down to the bed so I don’t hurt anyone, I ask him to take the straps off and he says he wont coz he’s afraid I might hurt someone. I beg, on the verge of tears, for him to take the straps off so he makes me promise Ill stay calm and then he takes the straps off. It was an IMENSE relief to find that I could still move.
Anyway I woke up, both my hands caked in my own blood, I’m not ashamed to admit I had pissed myself, and I had cuts all over my arms, only one of which was actually bad (the scar is about four inches long and now, two years on, I can still feel the dip in my muscle from how deep it was). My friends had looked for me for two hours when I ran off, and when I called them from hospital the next morning they (eventually) came and got me and brought me a change of clothes coz mine were all covered in blood and urine and the doctors had cut off my favorite pantera top
It was a week before my mum found out what had happened. Social Services rang her and told her that Id assaulted eight people, one of which was a guy in a service station who Id tried to hit with his own spanner, before punching in a window and when I went to hospital they’d tested my blood and found over a hundred dollars worth of speed in my system (Id never touched speed in my life) There are parts of this story I’ve left out coz what I experienced was too personal or coz I simply can’t remember it. But hows that for a fucked up story
