Psyduck
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 24, 2008
- Messages
- 672
Looking at the sky, is the sky looking back? Walking on the ground and feeling its hardness, does the ground feel me too? Two hits of acid, the effects are very mild, I continue walking around, heading to a nearby park. The visuals are very mild, I feel very sober. Am I not supposed to experience something more intense by now? I start looking around, noticing all kind of things, meaningless things. A grandmother is walking around with kids – they couldn’t be more joyful. A bunch of people is taking pictures on their day off – to remember, to remember what, why do we remember? What are all these people doing here? What shall we do? What shall we do tomorrow? What shall we ever do? Nothing to be done... How is it that people manage to experience joy in life? I start looking around, so many things are going on. I find myself within the story of Plato’s cave now, where the cave-dwellers are learning to see more intense light sources before they move gradually out of the cave and can stare at the sun. I have been blind, why didn’t I notice this before, that people can find meaning in trivial things. Walking back home, it started raining. I see a woman smoking, leaving her kid out of side, not paying attention. I feel dirty, utterly disgusted. She treats her kid as if it were a dog. How can she do this? I continue walking and see an old couple walking lovingly holding each other’s hand – they must have been around 70. I start feeling the beauty and goodness of the universe again. Am I learning to see more intense light source, will I be able to see the sun – the idea of the Good in Plato’s allegory of the cave?
Back at my place, I take the third hit of acid, and dwell into thought. Suddenly, I start feeling strangely. For the first time in my life, I feel I received a gift: the gift of being. It suddenly strikes me there’s a difference between having something and receiving something. We don’t have being such that sciences can determine its laws, neither do we have our own existence to organize our life. Everything we do is a receiving. A gift is always more than the object which is given, there’s a gesture in the giving as well. There must be a thanking before using it. I've been an unthankful impatient little child that wrapped the paper off the present, considering the gift as something for my use. I've neglected the act of the giving, which is primordial to the gift. Thanking comes before thinking. I thank, therefore I am.
Back at my place, I take the third hit of acid, and dwell into thought. Suddenly, I start feeling strangely. For the first time in my life, I feel I received a gift: the gift of being. It suddenly strikes me there’s a difference between having something and receiving something. We don’t have being such that sciences can determine its laws, neither do we have our own existence to organize our life. Everything we do is a receiving. A gift is always more than the object which is given, there’s a gesture in the giving as well. There must be a thanking before using it. I've been an unthankful impatient little child that wrapped the paper off the present, considering the gift as something for my use. I've neglected the act of the giving, which is primordial to the gift. Thanking comes before thinking. I thank, therefore I am.
