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love, lust it's all too confusing

The Endless

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 13, 2000
Messages
7
Location
Australia
Some mindless mutterings from a sad, sad individual.
I am continually disappointed by the come downs from E. I wish people were the same off drugs as they are on them. The potential is there but for some reason it doesn't filter through. What ever happened to love? Does it still exist? or is it just another obsolete thing thrown out by our disposable society. FUCK IMAGES and be yourself. Why is everyone like this? I hate this world we live in. Hopefully there is something better afterwards. Hopefully!!!!!!!
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[This message has been edited by endless one (edited 14 May 2000).]
 
think i get what your saying but im not sure. i met a girl at a club last weekend i was rolling she looked sad so we talked and chilled, and then her pilled kicked in so it was us in our own seperate world, i thought i could have loved this girl but after that night she ignored me go figure, the whole night she was worried i wouldnt call her. why cant people just talk. i dunno just my little story
 
If u meet a person at the club that you hook up with at the party you might as well leave it at that. it won't work out. i though i had the perfect bf, but we just broke up cause i'm a lovable candy kid and he's all jungle.he gets jealous easily. play it safe so you don't end up with a broken heart and so you don't lead anyone on.
-angie-
 
dude i know exactly what you mean. drugs can be great when used right, and they can be an icky terrible thing just the same...when i went clubbing one time sober, i realized how "different" my friends were. it was like they werent the same people as the ones i walked in with. even one of my really really good friends that night spilled all these hateful things she was holding back, but it all came out since she was rolling. i know that you dont like the world we live in but you cant do anything about that, but stay a good person and not let this affect you how its affected everyone else. were all thats left
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Life is too short to be a bitch -ForAnAngel
 
I feel you, but not everyone is two different people! My friends tell me I'm the nicest most considerate person on or off drugs, and they're always saying they want to set me up with someone -in fact I've a blind date with 2 of my newest freinds and a friend of their's tonight. I hold back nothing from anyone i meet regardless of whether I'm rolling or sober. You seem like your the same EndlessOne. There's people like us ot there, so keep your head up! I'm single right now, but since I've found the rave scene I've met so many people and though few of them have been the same when not rolling you can't blame them. Not everyone can find the courage to be as genuine and real off drugs as when they're on drugs. Two of my best friends found the persons they intend to marry while raving, so it can happen! stay true and sooner or later you'll find the right person just like I know I will! Someday someone will come along and see how true you are and that will touch them because they're looking for just what you have to offer. When that day arrives for you it will be worth all the waiting because it will be like the best rolling experience you've ever had- you'll forget about all the lonely times, and you'll feel high all the time! TRUST ME I KNOW dude, I've been there before with someone before! (wipes away a tear) circumstances forced us to separate for theose who are curious- I'm over it now, happend a long time ago.
PLUR man! - stay strong cause it won't be too long!
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there's no need to fear, richierich is here!
 
Sorry, depressing comedown ~LOL~ Things aren't as tragic as I made out. I'm just sick of false friendships and meaningless sex
Perhaps I expect too much ... Who knows?
Thanks for the replies
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[This message has been edited by endless one (edited 14 May 2000).]
 
ah....good old meanigliness sex and here's to writimg to my present lady who is at the same time ...willing to make it easier on you...you have some one to blame and writing about how I just don't love you enough!
Look out,kids, but the entire mueseum has been laid out for you...
don't pretend that your first love is your only love..believe me...there is alot of loving in between.
believe in the caress. of thighs pressed together in a way you two will only know..
know a warmth that will only be known between two
and because it is the simplest.....
God Bless You
 
love? I believe in it... now wether or not I think that will ever be returned is another matter. If I stop to think about it, it depresses me... in fact I'd like to cry now. I'm living in a situation of images now... I have an image, nothing more... when I crave something that I know is mine and mine alone. Not to posess, but to simply have an equal. Nothing hurts worse than giving your heart to someone who doesn't seem to value it, or who claims to, but continues to hurt you. Situations where people who are at times aloof become so caring and enjoyable while high... The little things come out on the drugs that are lacking in day to day life and you look out in puzzlement and wonder why it took getting high to bring this out? But when the drugs wear off it's back to normal and you can't be sure where you stand when really that's all you want to know... if you're wanted or not. If you're valued or not. Times like these I'd almost give the world to be able to see inside someone's mind, to know if I should hope at all or simply give up and get the pain over with now. I hate the not knowing... People may say you always have a choice... it's not so. Sometimes no matter how much you want something, you can't do a damn thing to get it. Because it is not your choice alone... Do the drugs bring out what is truely inside a person, the true nature? To what extent? I've said things I've regretted when high, but it didn't make them any less true... ah well... off to sleep for a while...
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-=*It's a very thin line to walk between phuckered up and not phuckered up!!*=-
AIM:RinoaAngel76
Yahoo! Messenger: AcidAngel76
 
this world aint so bad
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there are heaps of positives and all these awesome peeps at bluelight are the BEST xample.
and dont forget to smile, bcoz i know i do and it sux. so here -
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"just pass the vibes on, and take it easy....
 
Well I feel ya on the there isn't so much love around me gig. I have to agree that if you are hooking up at a club or party its probably going to be left at that. Many a time have I kid myself or thought that something might indeed develope into a lil something more. More than not it doesn't and you can set yourself up for a lil heartbreak or disappointment quite easly.
So what can we do? Personally I don't want to turn people away or not have the door open at the Shinobi residence for people to come in if they want. Though I can't stand the constant disappointment that sometimes comes with this open door policy where it seems all that is left from people coming in is mud stains on your carpet and welcome mat. You have trust not to trust people on calling back and giving the courtsey that you give them.
Life's a game you just need to get in a groove and learn how to play it your way.
Much love,
Shinobi
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Every great journey begins with the first step.
 
Yep, right on the spot there AcidAngel! One way i try to fix things is just.. Talking out your problems with your friend, speak your mind. Society has forced many of us to think that talking about stuff is "wierd", and it makes most people uncomfortable to do so. But if that friend is true, she/he will tell you "Dont be paranoid dude, you know i`m always there for ya!" As for club-love... dont even bother, everyone is a totally different person on E, try not to let yourself think that you've found the perfect person. You'll get hurt. Thru all my partying, i`ve stayed a virgin just so i dont get attached to some girl that's gonna kiss me off for another guy the next day like every single one of my girlfriends in the past. i`ll be 18 in june and dont plan on losing it!
 
Thats so very true, a close friend of mine met a guy while on E's and was totally convinced that they were meant for each other, They decided to meet up and goto the movies a week later, both thinking that they had found the love of their lives, half way through their date she realised that he was a fucking wanker, before the movie had even finished she got up and walked out on him. Bit harsh but true, now that happened from a girl who before the date, thought she was "In love" and said that he is (the one) now that just goes to show how some personality's can change while on E.
 
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