Opiate_videoguy
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jun 26, 2012
- Messages
- 4
Hey everybody... I'm new to this site but by no means new to using opiates & other various drugs. With me, It started out what I suppose is how it starts for most people... In december 2005 I was 19, and had started to notice an increasingly painful lump on my left testicle. Well, I did the one stupid thing I should not have done: I ignored it for about 6months because I was to embarrassed to get it looked at; stupid decision, but thankfully it wasnt cancerous, but it did require two surgeries. It was after the first surgery I found out how GOOD those post surgery pills made me feel... I don't think I have to describe how it made me feel. After the surgery I was working at a music store... Some of the customers gave me basically endless connections... After a year or two i NEVER had any money because of buying the damn pills...I knew I had a problem and I knew I needed to do something about it... I have tried methadone but I honestly still get a high from taking that... And I'm a bitch when it comes to that high... I ALWAYS end up giving in to it! So it felt like I was just trading one addiction for another...well I had heard about Imodium...loperamide. I had read that it took away the withdraws without giving any kind of high. Well, I tried it and to my surprise it actuall did the trick! now i know everybody is different but I honestly did and still do feel something like a high when I take it... It puts me in a good mood, I'm talkative and I feel like I can face the day and actually function. Again, I had replaced one addiction for another! All this was almost two years ago.... And I still take the lope almost daily. I'm scared to death about what kind of damage I could be doin to myself by taking it so much...and if I go more than two days without taking it, a withdrawal WAY WAY worse than regular pills sets in to the point where I just give in again and take more lope! And within a few hours, I feel normal again. I want to stop so bad and I've tried quite a few times but on about the third or fourth day in, that god awful withdrawel drags me down farther and farther until I give in... I've never made it more than a full week trying to stop... But on the third or fourth day it it just gets worse and worse every day I don't take it! I REALLY want to stop so bad! I honestly haven't told ANYONE else about this i know so it is also frustrating not being able to talk to anyone about it! I honestly just want to STOP taking it so bad! And for those that don't know lope IS an opiate your body treats it exactly as it would the rx pills, it just doesn't give you anywhere near the head buzz if the others... These withdraws are identical to any other opiate!! Any advice anyone?!?!