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Looking for support

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fabriclondon

Bluelighter
Joined
Sep 25, 2012
Messages
877
Location
Philadelphia
Hey guys. My thoughts are disjointed so this post will be short. I've been addicted to opiates for about 10 years now. I think the most time I ever had TOTALLY clean was a few 2 month stretches. For the past year and a half I've been chipping. Using every few days when I can gather together some money. I just want to stop for good. My last shot was 3 days ago. I took 6mg suboxone yesterday and 25 mg loperamide today. I'm just looking for support here. I really want this and my attitude has never been this good when facing a detox. Thanks for listening.
 
Your in the right place many of us have been addicted for years. I only had a few months of heavy opiate use years ago but I also spent a lot of time on kratom. Its funny how you can be away from something so long and still get addicted again very easily. Good luck dude maybe you should get some subs from a doc and wean yourself off them after a few months?
 
Thank you for the reply. I think this time I'm going to try to tough it out. I have never been able to follow a sub taper plan. I think I can do this from the muscle. With support of course!
 
FORCING myself to get out of the house all day. Distract, distract, distract. Helps that alarm that goes off in my head every second that says HEROINHEROINHEROINHEROIN! : )
 
Clean about 40 hours now. I used Saturday and Sunday. I hate myself for giving in but I'm trying again to kick. Why the hell can't I stop picking up???? Fuck.
 
Good for you. All you gotta do is try, and you are doing that, hang in there, I always ask myself the same thing, yet no answer, I'm right behind ya!!
 
Thank you so much for the reply. I had coffee this morning and that was a disaster. Anxiety so bad I had to go take a walk. Even though I feel like I'm 90 years old. Bones aching. Out of breath. Withdrawal grrrrr.
 
That's good, I try to walk every day, in my younger years, long long ago, I was a runner, and, now I am lucky to be able to walk, jk, anyway, I'm on day 4, I care for my 91 year old mom, I made her walk around outside yesterday and it was bit much, try and stay occupied, it will help.
 
Congrats on day 4! That's awesome. I just had a phone interview for a job and I actually did really well so hopefully I hear something. Just forced myself to eat now I'm going out for a walk. Hang in there : )
 
Nice, I hope it works out for you, hopefully the worst will be behind you soon, you can do this, progress, not perfection is what they keep saying.
 
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Good going! Glad you doing better, 3 days is not an easy task, congrats to you! Hang in there, day 5 once again for me, just gotta keep trying.
 
Ten years is a pretty long run, l know l was sick of it after five. It's just not sustainable. Even though I have been off of heavy opiates for years l still take Norcos, morphine and methadone here and there and even that's enough to keep me feeling like shit most of the time. I haven't had anything since last Monday and l feel just okay. It's a nightmare hang in there.
 
How are you guys doing? Still clean or trying? I was toughing it out but I caves and used on Saturday and Sunday. I am now on suboxone. At this time I think it is the right move. I am off probation in 2 months and I need to pass my last two drug tests so I can move out of Philly. I know they say changing location isn't a cure but every single section in my city is a trigger for me. Anyway, I am feeling positive about this move at the moment. Hope you are doing well!
 
You got this man.
I have been detoxing off heroin and xanax, it was no fun.
It get's better though. You're doing great.
Keep it up!
Much love to you
 
If your probation allows it have you ever been on Suboxone legitimately? I know people say it's a nightmare to kick and of course it is but l credit the stuff for helping me get away from a huge H habit. Like l mentioned l still take pills here and there and whenever l try and stop completely it's horrible. That's why l haven't quit completely. Just keep trying, everyone here knows what a struggle it is!
 
Thanks! I have been on subs legitimately several times. And I must say that when it's done right it works GREAT for me. I have enough access to them now and enough experience that I'm going to do it on my own.
 
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