Looking for Advice- Quiting methadone

[jshlmb]

Hi all,

I realize that this type of thread has been done a thousand times, but I'd like to give specific details about my situation and get any advice/support that I can. I've been a member of this forum for a few years and it's the first place I reference if I have any questions about anything substance related.

A little background:
I have been an opiate user/abuser most of my adult life. I am 28 years old, in my early 20's (21,22) I developed a regular/daily oxycodone habit of ~150-200mg/day. Trying to support this habit (financially etc.) was very stressful for me and eventually my habit became greater than what I could get or afford. I revealed my addition to my girlfriend (now my wife) and decided to go to methadone maintenance. I used the excuse that "I wanted to get better" with my family, but the biggest reason I did it was because I knew it was an easy(er) way to support my habit and I would have a steady/reliable source to feed my habit. At this time, part of me knew deep down that I didn't want to continue to be an opiate addict, but I wasn't fully commited to give it up.

MMT was good to me. I started at 30mg/day (that was where the doctor started me) and worked my way up to 70mg/day. I could have continued to increase my daily dose, but had heard horror stories about coming off of high doses of methadone and wanted to avoid that as much as possible. After a ~year on MMT, I found out that that my girlfriend was pregnant. Suddenly things changed dramatically for me. My mindset completely did a 180 and I thought it was important for me try and get clean. I slowly tapered over the course of a few months down to 2.5mg/day with little/no issues. I was excited, how hard could it be to kick if I went from 70 to 2.5mg with very little discomfort? It turned out to be a lot harder than I ever imagined. I quit going to the clinic and went through a week or so of withdrawl symptoms, and unfortunately relapsed back to hydrocodone/oxycodone. I was still determined to quit my habit altogether and after a few weeks actually did quit everything. I went through a short withdrawl from a fairly minimal hydro/oxy habit (~30mg/day) and stayed clean for about a month.

After being clean for about a month I picked everything back up again. I was unhappy with myself and the last thing I wanted to do was go back into MMT. I had (have) a very good friend who is in MMT, and after and few conversations with him he agreed he would be able to supply me with 40mg of methadone/day. For the past few years I have been getting my dose from him (and his wife). Over the last 2 years I feel like I've actually benefited more from MMT this time than I initially did when I was in treatment myself.

I have sort of been preparing myself mentally to be able to stop over the last year or so, but haven't made any attempts. I found out a few months ago that my friend is no longer going to be able to supply me, and have been tapering down and planning to stop all together. I've went from 40mg to 10mg/day over the last 2 months, but I will be out of methadone in the next week. I'm actually very optimistic about my situation, and am trying to make my best attempt to make this the end of my opiate addiction. Having been through this a time or two before, I don't have any unrealistic expectations. I do however think that this is the best time/place/moment in my life for me to do this.

I am very afraid of coming off methadone. I have a full time job/wife/kid and really have no opportunity to take anytime off to go through acute withdrawl. So, the reality of my situation is that I'm going to be working 40hrs/wk and life is going to be business as usual for me. I have a few supplies to help me through wd but not alot. I have access to Kratom but have never used it and not sure if I even will. I have a few 2mg clonazepam (like 5) that I've managed to find but don't think that's enough. I've also started taking a multivitamin this week and also have some protein power I'll be using to attempt to get some calories while in wd. I'll also be using a lot of loperamide.

If anyone out there has any advice for me, or even just some encouragement I could really use it. I'm afraid that I already know the answer to most of my questions, and I'm looking for any additional information/ideas/supplements/anything that will make this less uncomfortable.

Thanks,

jshlmb

 

[itsALLfake]

I would taper as low as you can get with the Methadone you have, and when you're out or nearly so, continue at the mg that you would be at that point. I can't imagine working withdrawing from any opioid, let alone Methadone. If you think going to the clinic would start you back up at a higher dose, than obviously stick with your gut decision on that one.

The only thing that I've found to help with opioid withdrawal is time and rest and a hot shower never hurt either. I haven't found anything that would help aid in the pain. I luckily had a girlfriend that was prescribed Zofran, so when I would start choking on bile, that would stop that almost every time. I'm not going to recommend drugs. I'm not a medical professional. Which it may be wise to get a medical opinion about this. I had a friend in rehab who went in and out of shock from detoxing on Methadone.

Is your job physically demanding or mundane?

 

[neversickanymore]

I came off 150mgpd methadone, 260mgpd roxy, and 6 mgpd xannax using clonidine, testosterone, lamictal.. but had i known I would have added neurontin and possiblr melatonin in the mix.. the withdrawal was long and unpleasant so i never sat around.. i was probably the only guy in full blown methadone and benzo detox at the americas largest water park, at the pro football and baseball games, at the zoo, cat fishing, mowing the lawn.. I figured why sit around and concentrate on how miserable i felt.. better to think about every two minutes instead of every two seconds.. I found that moving around and keeping busy made me feel allot better than just sitting around wishing and waiting to get better.. I would definitely explore all those medications and possible side effects as all or some will definitely help you.. and as methadone has such a long withdrawal. i would not even think of prolonging it with any opiat including loperamide.. and if and when you talk to your dr about clonidine please ask for a schedule to be dosed every four hours as this is the most beneficial IMO.. I could set my watch by my clonidine intake as every three hours and forty five minutes I would have no doubt it was time for another dose, almost as good at reminding us it needs to be re dosed as the opiates, but as it was less and less to no longer needed the reminder went away automatically.

Here is another approach that you may want to consider.. http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/...ex-to-Morphine-for-faster-withdrawal-bad-idea but you will need to consider if the benifits outway the obviouse risks..

I think it is really important to develop and be prepared to implement a recovery plan before you begin to withdraw.. so many addicts focus on the acute withdrawal, when it is the post acute withdrawal that get most people who are committed to kicking.. do you have a plan for these?

Hey congratulations on making the decision to loose the metal cuffs.. and if I can do this so can you!!!!

 

[caseface99]

I hate to say it, but you will probably relapse again if you don't work a daily program of recovery.

I didn't see anything about that in your story - I'd be amazed if you could do this on self will alone and succeed, especially after having failed multiple times.

I've told countless other and I'll tell you - AA/NA has saved my life, along with millions of others around the world. If you don't want to do that (please tell us why, maybe I can clear up some myths/concerns for you) then there is LifeRing and Smart Recovery meetings as well. I'm afraid I'd be giving nothing but bad advice if I didn't tell you that you probably wont make it without building a support network. So whatever that means for you, you're going to need to figure it out and do it in order to truly get sober. Because a baby wont stop you from using. Period. No amount of consequences is enough to stop an addict.

I wish you the best, I sincerely hope you find your path and remain sober this time! Keep checking in and let us know how things are going!

 

[jshlmb]

Thanks everybody for the replies.

I completely agree with what you said caseface, and I wasn't really clear about my plans for recovery after acute withdrawl in my post. This is definitely something I have spent a lot of time thinking about. For the last year or so I have actually been preparing myself mentally for this, so this isn't just a knee jerk decision, it just happens to be the right time. While on methadone for the last few years I have completely change my lifestyle and the company I keep, I know virtually no one who uses drugs anymore and have made a huge effort to distance myself from anything that would cause me to fallback on old habits.

I know these things are just a small step, but I am very confident and feel that this is the right time for me to do this. I also think it's important to know that I'm not doing this for any one "reason" other than that I truly want to be done with my addiction. I realize that every addict probably has said the same thing before, but I know I have what it takes to beat this.

One thing that I do plan to do once I've been through acute withdrawl, is vist some sort of doctor, not sure if it'll be a psych or GP, I haven't seen a doctor in years. I read into using wellbutin to combat addiction and I'm sure there are some other medical treatment

 

[caseface99]

I'm, happy to hear you're not only taking the steps you need to take to get sober, but to stay sober!

Getting sober is the easy part. Staying sober is a totally different game, but anyone can do it as long as they put half as much effort into recovery as they put into maintaining their habit!

So keep it up! I'm really happy for you I hope everything turns out alright! Stay strong.