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Long term effects of Shrooms

cramdogg

Bluelighter
Joined
May 22, 2008
Messages
63
I had a particularly unpleasant trip on shrooms a while back.

Very briefly, I took them at a crappy outdoor rave with dodgy people and experienced the most indescribable anxiety imaginable. Yes, I realize now that I broke the cardinal rule of set and setting as this place was most definitely not conducive to a good trip. The main theme of the anxiety was the thought that: 'What if this feeling never ends? What if this is what hell is like and it is permanent?'

At this point I began to drink copious amounts of alcohol to quell the anxiety. I then managed to dance a bit and apparently was telling my good friend repeatedly how much I loved him which doesn't sound all that negative. Well, things got really bad when I needed to get out of there. About 6 hours into the trip(luckily I assume the effects had worn off) I (very very very stupidly) attempted to drive my car back home whereupon I had a minor fender bender but managed to make it home. The trauma of the fender bender and the nights mindset compelled me to string up some wire with the goal of hanging myself. I never went through with it though.

I have tripped before and have had truly awe inspiring experiences where I've felt that there is something incredible out there which I must know. A mystical and beautiful experience which I know can reap lasting rewards.

What I want to know is, do you think that a disaster like I had spiritually, intellectually or otherwise impede me if a positive experience can do long-lasting good? Honestly, I'm fishing for some reassurance that I can get back on track. Psilocybin initially piqued my interest as I have severe OCD of which I have read psilocybin can offer some relief which it indeed did do. The obsessive and over analytical OCD mind which I have is now turning to my experience and rehashing it over and over and I'm seeking a respite.

I am trying to make sense of why it happened. Was it because I was amongst strangers in a bad environment, where the shrooms were destroying my ego while in such a place your ego would be fighting to remain active? I'm sure many of you have had bad experiences and have been fine, I was just hoping for some kind souls to perhaps give me some insight into the happenings. I know my whole fear of eternal suffering is irrational as I have had awe inspiring spiritual experiences where I've felt the opposite of this before. Why though am I still afraid? It most probably is my OCD flaring up and making me doubt everything to believe the irrational.

Anyways I am of the opinion that I should try them again in a super safe and well thought out way although this may not be possible as I'm living in Asia now and can't obtain any. Maybe I'm giving them too much power? Anyway thanks if you read it and the peace I crave I hope you have.
 
I've felt that there is something incredible out there which I must know. A mystical and beautiful experience which I know can reap lasting rewards.

Never again.

god once told me, "from the depths of your location reap your own reward."
 
I put up a long post that answered a question I thought you'd asked, which was can you do mushrooms / psyches again. Realised that's not quite the question you're asking so deleted. Re-reading your post I'm still not sure what you're asking?

Are you asking whether you should overly analyse a bad-trip made worse by 'copious amounts of alcohol'? No. Take it for what it was: a bad-trip made worse by 'copious amounts of alcohol'? That's all.

There are no long term effects of psychedelics, mental, emotional, or physical, other than the ones you invest yourself in for further exploration. A trip is not positive or negative in and of itself, except in the terms you choose to define it. It's just a trip. Psychedelic means 'mind revealing' but we're talking a mind revealed under the influence of drugs and made very sensitive to internal and external influences we would ordinarily not notice at all, or easily dismiss. Can be very confrontational, realising that your mind ain't what you thought it was no question. It can be a revelation we're not always ready for, and some of it will be useful, some of it will be absolute bullshit. Set / setting, yeah? I think the idea is to notice the thoughts that arise, without investing too much time and energy in them while under the influence, noting the ones that may bear further investigation later when you're straight. Seems you're over-analysing where you went wrong in a way that caused a bad trip. First clue is you didn't feel safe, got anxious, then got really pissed in the hope alcohol as a social lubricant might make you feel safer where you were, which made a bad trip worse. Was your OCD a factor in that at all d'you think? Do you usually suffer from social anxiety to any extent? There doesn't seem to be anything more than that worth fretting over? Whether you'll be able to trip again without memories of a previous bad experieince intruding is another question.
 
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i think the take-away is... let that night go. allow it to enter the past. and then you will be able to look forward! next time you will have the benefit of experience and wisdom to cause much more winningness in the future.
 
There is no such thing as a "bad trip" to me, only difficult trips as some people like to say. That sounds exactly like what you experienced, maybe you need to think about why you were having those anxious thoughts. It could even simply be a bit of a lesson to avoid that kind of scenery when tripping in future ;)

Whatever those thoughts were caused by, try and enter your next trip with a clear open mind, rather than fear and anxiety, or it's bound to repeat itself. If you're too worried about tripping, don't - wait until that changes :)
 
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