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Long distance and I'm being bad

M

max_

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 15, 2011
Messages
578
She loves me. I loved her for long but now I'm not so sure. Plus she's 1000 miles away (literally). She is a great person and I don't want to loose her or misstreat her (which i have been doing lately). She keeps calling ans texting as it always have been and thought i still care i'm just not up for all that stuff. I'm tired of the long distance thing but i can't make such a big commitment as telling her to move here.
Should i ask for time ? What kind of time not speaking at all ? Should i say nothing? I have no idea what to do now and i don't want to wrong her.
 
When you say that you've been bad and mistreating her, what do you mean? Are you seeing someone else or just not so interested in her anymore? If you ask for time, that's sort of stringing her along if your heart isn't in it. You need to tell her how you really feel, even if it ends up hurting her. If she is wanting a commitment and you don't, it's best to be honest for both your sakes.
 
Long distance relationships are really tough, but they are still a relationship that comes with rules and boundaries. It's obviously not working for you and your cheating on her, this is making you feel bad so you know its wrong.

You know your not ready for the commitment of asking her to move to you - are you ready to move to her? Where is this relationship going? You don't need time - you know this relationship is over. Tell her and move on.
 
Don't say anything, in my opinion. There's nothing morally wrong or invidious about having flings on the side of things, if you get the tenor. I would, however, explain—tactfully, mate—to her about where things are drifting and that you'd really want her nearer to you, so you won't feel an impetus to drift. Maybe she'll understand, but unfortunately she may not. My girl did, at least, and we've been together for nearly 5 years hence.
 
so what have you been doing?

besides all this if you want a relationship to progress you need to live nearby at some point.

maybe that point is now...
 
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