Okay so the first i did .250 gram of Mdma crystals and i have the best time of life ever, Second i had a little more then a gram at once and i flip it, I lost my mind for weeks, I was depressed for 2-3weeks after, Then life became better. Now again after about little more then 2 months i go into cycles of depression like for few weeks ill get depressed all over again and then i will feel normal. I know life is not the same for sure, I dont know if its just my depression which are giving me these negative thoughts or this mdma effects which got me so altered. Main reason i feel depressed is because lot of my friends have called me weird or situations with have got weird.. I think mainly about how people are perceiving me and thats what gets me more depressed. I just want to feel normal and happy. Im thinking about doing MDMA again but less then a quarter so i feel that happiness again which happened on the first trip. Advice and help please.
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Life is not the same after MDMA
- Thread starter Xamanus
- Start date
\/apor
Bluelighter
this may be better suited for The Dark Side?
somewherehappy
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2012
- Messages
- 22
Hi I'm sorry to hear your going through this.
I know a friend who used to take a lot but she is doing so well now! I remember she told me she took daily doses of B vitamin complex. (like one with them all) She also forced herself to exercise at least a bit each day. We haven't kept up but I remember seeing her after about a year from when she stopped and she was so healthy and happy! She also didn't take any anti depressants or anything and actually stopped taking her ritalin, which may have helped too.
I'd recommend to give it at least 6 months to clear out, also take the B complex to help repair in body.
It's my opinion to not start an anti depressant or anything, dr will probably throw psych meds at you fast if your depressed. Give your body time first, it may heal. If you start an anti depressant before your brain can recover, it could make it worse but it also changes your brains chemistry and may have long term effect making it impossible to really get back to normal. Taking one in general I advise against but after E recovery could really prevent natural repair. Also they may prescribe benzo but my advise is yes it could help but if you use it daily and long term your anxiety will certainly get worse. (as evidenced in major clinical trials) use it properly with breaks to avoid tolerance.
Do you take other drugs/meds? This could be factor.
I hope you'll feel happy again soon.. it can take time and another thing is sounds like your main anxieties are about friends and how your being seen. A counselor/therapist (not psychiatrist!!!) who is knowledgable about social anxiety may be able to help you. Just to talk to someone about it can sometimes give relief or they can provide different perspective or advise on things to try.
I know a friend who used to take a lot but she is doing so well now! I remember she told me she took daily doses of B vitamin complex. (like one with them all) She also forced herself to exercise at least a bit each day. We haven't kept up but I remember seeing her after about a year from when she stopped and she was so healthy and happy! She also didn't take any anti depressants or anything and actually stopped taking her ritalin, which may have helped too.
I'd recommend to give it at least 6 months to clear out, also take the B complex to help repair in body.
It's my opinion to not start an anti depressant or anything, dr will probably throw psych meds at you fast if your depressed. Give your body time first, it may heal. If you start an anti depressant before your brain can recover, it could make it worse but it also changes your brains chemistry and may have long term effect making it impossible to really get back to normal. Taking one in general I advise against but after E recovery could really prevent natural repair. Also they may prescribe benzo but my advise is yes it could help but if you use it daily and long term your anxiety will certainly get worse. (as evidenced in major clinical trials) use it properly with breaks to avoid tolerance.
Do you take other drugs/meds? This could be factor.
I hope you'll feel happy again soon.. it can take time and another thing is sounds like your main anxieties are about friends and how your being seen. A counselor/therapist (not psychiatrist!!!) who is knowledgable about social anxiety may be able to help you. Just to talk to someone about it can sometimes give relief or they can provide different perspective or advise on things to try.
A benzo is just a temporary thing. And you can get hooked on those fast! Benzo WDs are horrible. I personally don't have a lot of experience with long term benzos but i know people who are hooked on them. Maybe taking a benzo or two a couple days after you roll will help. But i wouldnt suggest using them for long term. Stay safe!
2c-goinsane
Bluelighter
yeah i would try not to roll for a good while that would just make what your feeling worse and restart the healing process all over agian. i go through those negative thoughts and emotions going up and down all the time ever since i started consuming to much mdma and its been years so be prepared for atleast some consequences if you do it to yourself. thats awfully alot of mdma to be consuming aswel, i could have split that g up in so many more rolls but heyyy thats me
^ I know right
Especially if you dosed at incredible events where you had seriously the best time of your life. You look back on those days and all those people you met .. it feels like part of your soul is taken away. I think the high dose MDMA experience is just too powerful on the mind, it's something that kind of stays with you.
Especially if you dosed at incredible events where you had seriously the best time of your life. You look back on those days and all those people you met .. it feels like part of your soul is taken away. I think the high dose MDMA experience is just too powerful on the mind, it's something that kind of stays with you.