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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Let's hear some good insults

Some more assorted Tuckerisms:

"come the fuck in, or fuck the fuck off"

"I'd love to stop and chat to you but I'd rather have type 2 diabetes"

“Within your ‘purview’? Where do you think you are, some fucking regency costume drama? This is a government department, not some fucking Jane fucking Austen novel! Allow me to pop a jaunty little bonnet on your purview and ram it up your shitter with a lubricated horse cock!”

Tucker's Law: "If some cunt can fuck something up, that cunt will pick the worst possible time to fucking fuck it up cause that cunt's a cunt."

"How much fucking shit is there on the menu and what fucking flavour is it?"

"Please could you take this note, ram it up his hairy inbox and pin it to his fucking prostate."
 
Mr Wobble said:
Some more assorted Tuckerisms:

"come the fuck in, or fuck the fuck off"

"I'd love to stop and chat to you but I'd rather have type 2 diabetes"

“Within your ‘purview’? Where do you think you are, some fucking regency costume drama? This is a government department, not some fucking Jane fucking Austen novel! Allow me to pop a jaunty little bonnet on your purview and ram it up your shitter with a lubricated horse cock!”

Tucker's Law: "If some cunt can fuck something up, that cunt will pick the worst possible time to fucking fuck it up cause that cunt's a cunt."

"How much fucking shit is there on the menu and what fucking flavour is it?"

"Please could you take this note, ram it up his hairy inbox and pin it to his fucking prostate."
Click to expand...
I have REALLY got to catch up on that when I get home... :D
 
StoneHappyMonday said:
Can't really compete with the Scots, but one of the best I've heard actually used up Noorf in England in a pub - "Here's a quid lad, go and buy yourself a life."
Click to expand...
*listens to whiny complaint about _whatever_*

*reaches into pocket*

"here's 10p, go and phone someone that gives a fuck." :D
 
I'd need for you to spike a pint of Jack Daniels with 100mg Valium before I would even think about going home with you.
 
More Tuckerisms - brilliant.

* "I wouldn't fucking piss on you if you were fucking allergic to piss."


* "I've got more on my plate than a spinster at a wedding."


* "I thought I'd made it clear that when I want your advice I'll give you the special signal, which is me being sectioned under the fucking Mental Health Act."


* "I've got a to-do list as long as a fucking Leonard Cohen song."


* "He's so dense, light bends around him."


* "I'll be with you in two shakes of a crying baby."


* "I'm fucking all ears. I'm fucking Andrew Marr here."


* "Please don't get up, I'm not Viagra."


* "Get over here. Now. Might be advisable to wear brown trousers and a shirt the colour of blood."


* "I think we should use the carrot and stick approach, yeah. You take a carrot, you stick it up his fucking arse, followed by the stick."
 
He/she is as bi as a cheerio wave

Yer ma's a bodybuilder and yer da's a dressfitter

Away and play wae yer man boobs fat chap

She's got a fanny like a well abused bus seat

Spoken to a girl.... 'How's it going sweetbeaver?'

He's hung like a budgies tongue...
 
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'Doyle' is one used a lot round my area.

An insult. Implying that some one is of less than average inteligence.
"I can't believe you don't know where your own house is, you doyle!"

I feel 'shitbag' is underrated also, as is 'cocksmoker'.
 
To someone laughin hysterically.....

Have you left yer loveballs in?


If someone gets cheeky;

You speak when spat at!
 
Okay, YOU, shut up. Stop talking. You're bringing down the property value of vagina's everywhere.
 
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