Leaving for the third time...

[Cosmic Mist]

Sometimes it's hard when you're always falling,
and everything you see just seems like more of the same -
Life pulls you down - you continue crawling
through absurdity - events now mundane.
And you've left me here to wade my way through it -
although not alone, your comfort would be nice.
You actions still wound, as they always have, and
i'm no longer sure whether i want you in my life...
In fact, wheni look at everything you've said; the tones you've spoken; the actions you've taken,
i'm not sure now whether i should mourn your leaving,
or if, by mourning i am horribly mistaken.
For my 19 years of life on this earth,
how many years have you been by my side,
supported my decisions, hugged me when i was down?
How many times have you said you'd call, but lied?
And maybe i haven't made it too easy
for you to come waltzing back into my life,
but damnit! I though i was worth the effort -
i though i was worth more than your stupid pride...
I've said it so many times before,
and in truth, i know i'll say it again,
i now endeavour to think of you nevermore -
i'll never ask anything of you again,
because i know that our bond isn't enough,
and what i once valued is dying day by day,
but you continue on with your selfish lifestyle,
ostrisising those who stand in your way.
Although i guess i still love you,
i guess i must leave,
and our dying relationship,
now bereave,
for the effort's been mine -
all mine in vain -
and shall continue to be,
until the end of our days...

 

[E-girl]

And maybe i haven't made it too easy
for you to come waltzing back into my life,
but damnit! I though i was worth the effort -
i though i was worth more than your stupid pride...
I think there is someone is each of our lives whom our heart (and often times, us) returns to, over and over. and now because they are a good person, but because things with them are familiar, and comfortable. because somewehre along the way, there were good times. and its easy with them. and they know you inside and out.
but you know what? someone said to me once, if it didn't work the first time, it wont work any time after that either. i wish i would have taken that to heart.
i had a signature once, a really good quote, i dont know who its by, but it went something like, "Don't settle for the one you can live with; wait for the one you can't live without."
I live by those words now.

 

[Cosmic Mist]

Thanks E-Girl - you always post such greatreplies to all the stuff that people write - you're a gem...
This piece isn't actually written about a S/O, but what you said still rings true...
...sometimes you've just got to learn when to walk away...

*hugs*

 

[neverwas]

im in a (reading old peices mood today)

there is soo much of your peice CM babe i wana quote...it is exactly my thoughts on certain people in my family that i have alway struggled to put into words...

how many years have you been by my side,
supported my decisions, hugged me when i was down?
How many times have you said you'd call, but lied?
And maybe i haven't made it too easy
for you to come waltzing back into my life,
but damnit! I though i was worth the effort -
i though i was worth more than your stupid pride...

Although i guess i still love you,
i guess i must leave,
and our dying relationship,
now bereave,
for the effort's been mine -
all mine in vain -
and shall continue to be,
until the end of our days...