I had a disagreement with a close friend last summer. Some girls that she was friends with accused me of saying some shitty things about one of their friends who did some bad stuff to me last year and one particular act nearly destroyed me. I probably did say some shitty things, but not in the context they spread as gossip, and they told my close friend that I was asked to leave a party because of it which is definitely untrue. Unfortunately my close friend was having some shit and ended up having to step away from the friendship... things kind of drifted although we have hung out a few times and we've talked it through slowly and gradually.
It was a real turning point tonight, she texted this morning and said she was going to drop a few things off, after having already told a mutual friend she'd leave them with her. I wasn't expecting her to stay but she came in and stayed for a good few hours, we had a drink, and had a really good catch-up about what we've been up to since July last year. It was like she'd never been away. She even brought some daft wee gifts for me.
We've agreed that we'll never really know what happened that night that I was allegedly told to leave her friend's party and all I can really say about it is that I know I wouldn't have acted in the way they accused me of and I had two friends sitting with me that confirmed that I left of my own accord as I was drunk and wanted to go to bed. I trust those friends are telling me the truth because what would they have to gain from lying? It's possible I did put on a bit of a shit-show but I was so drunk and stoned... I'm an asshole when I get drunk and then smoke weed. I try not to do it anymore unless I'm on my own and need to sleep. I told my close friend this and she's accepted that I'm in a much better place now.
I'm really happy that she came and saw me, and that she stayed, and had a good talk about her own life as well as discussing what's going on with me. I had felt like she abandoned me for the popular crowd for a long time, but now I've spent some time with her, I think she's like me. I don't have a clique. I base all my friendships round the individual rather than a "scene" and I accept that there will always be people that I like and people that I don't like. I won't hang out with her social scene but from how things were tonight, we'll focus on doing our own thing and hopefully start building bridges again.
It made me so sad when things went wrong and I've spend so much time alone trying to figure out how to fix it... and it makes me feel really glad that I've been able to start mending things. I don't know if we'll ever be how we were, I don't know if I want to go back to that, but I do know that she is a really lovely person and her friendship is important to me.
Things have been so tough lately, and they're finally starting to look up, at work and in my personal life. I just hope to god that nothing awful happens. I desperately want to trust in these lovely times but I'm so scared that something will ruin it. I guess I just have to refrain from focussing too much on the positive and try to just live. I've lived through so many hard times and it would be so lovely to have some success.
I'm just going to be glad for these moments of happiness and let the sad times go... it feels like it's the only way to move forward...
It was a real turning point tonight, she texted this morning and said she was going to drop a few things off, after having already told a mutual friend she'd leave them with her. I wasn't expecting her to stay but she came in and stayed for a good few hours, we had a drink, and had a really good catch-up about what we've been up to since July last year. It was like she'd never been away. She even brought some daft wee gifts for me.
We've agreed that we'll never really know what happened that night that I was allegedly told to leave her friend's party and all I can really say about it is that I know I wouldn't have acted in the way they accused me of and I had two friends sitting with me that confirmed that I left of my own accord as I was drunk and wanted to go to bed. I trust those friends are telling me the truth because what would they have to gain from lying? It's possible I did put on a bit of a shit-show but I was so drunk and stoned... I'm an asshole when I get drunk and then smoke weed. I try not to do it anymore unless I'm on my own and need to sleep. I told my close friend this and she's accepted that I'm in a much better place now.
I'm really happy that she came and saw me, and that she stayed, and had a good talk about her own life as well as discussing what's going on with me. I had felt like she abandoned me for the popular crowd for a long time, but now I've spent some time with her, I think she's like me. I don't have a clique. I base all my friendships round the individual rather than a "scene" and I accept that there will always be people that I like and people that I don't like. I won't hang out with her social scene but from how things were tonight, we'll focus on doing our own thing and hopefully start building bridges again.
It made me so sad when things went wrong and I've spend so much time alone trying to figure out how to fix it... and it makes me feel really glad that I've been able to start mending things. I don't know if we'll ever be how we were, I don't know if I want to go back to that, but I do know that she is a really lovely person and her friendship is important to me.
Things have been so tough lately, and they're finally starting to look up, at work and in my personal life. I just hope to god that nothing awful happens. I desperately want to trust in these lovely times but I'm so scared that something will ruin it. I guess I just have to refrain from focussing too much on the positive and try to just live. I've lived through so many hard times and it would be so lovely to have some success.
I'm just going to be glad for these moments of happiness and let the sad times go... it feels like it's the only way to move forward...