• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

last resort question

JasperTheReckless

JasperTheReckless

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 1, 2011
Messages
339
I failed a suicide attempt a month ago a decided I'd rather die an addict than a suicide case.

I'm trying to find a drug that fights off the thoughts, without completely smashing my personality. I've been using dxm but it's beginning to change who I am. I'm facing some rough times and i don't want to be dealing with feelings like this on top of it all.
 
Do you have a therapist? If so, find a better one. If not at all, find a good one.

Even you would find a drug with the desired effect, how long do you think would this work without changing your personality? There's a certain livestyle coming with addiction.
Anyway, people are constantly changing. It's not about not changing, it's about changing for the better (which means changing in a way that makes you feel better).
 
try smoking high grade weed if your into harder shit u may think that weed is bullshit but some high grade weed might help u get through your hard time. also its not bad for your health like most street drugs out there and its not physically addictive.
 
^Not good advice. Everyone responds to drugs, even pot, differently and someone who is feeling sucidal should not be making attempts on their own to solve the problem.
While there are drugs that do help with suicidal ideation- any of this would be through studies and strictly monitored by professionals. If you are interested in finding illegal drugs to fill the gap, this is the wrong place to do so.
My suggestion would be to look into clinical trials if you are interested in alternative methods of working through depression and thoughts of suicide.
BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY seeking out professional help as soon as you can.

Are you currently seeing a therapist?
Keep your head up and please reach out here when you need.
You'll find a lot of support in TDS. <3
 
I have a doctor but my lithium isn't doing shit for my thoughts. It fights off mania, but I still think of dying. Hospitals don't help, its like a short break from what's real. I just want to know what it's like to be happy
 
Weed isn't preferable, I already struggle with anxiety.
I'm also poor. I am homeless for the most part, on a friends couch right now. My family is shutting me out save for my mother and my aunt; I attempted, because my father and sister told me it wasn't a real problem and to quit being a bitch.

What I mean by the dxm is changing me, is it makes me mean; I don't bite my tongue. I tell people what i feel.
 
yeah oceans advice is a healthier way to go but u aked about drugs so thats what i would suggest. u should probably talk to your doc and tell him that the lithium doesnt stop your suicidal thoughts.
 
DXM is harsh, try to stop it because this may interfere with lithium. Maybe that's why the lithium isn't helping.
 
Dissociatives aren't a very good class of drugs to abuse regularly, they'll definitely hype that mania up a couple of good fat notches ime, eventually will start making you act kinda schizophrenic like. (i love dissociatives when not used much tho)

Ime the happiness thing doesn't come over night it takes time, have to keep working for it and keep working with your self and everything around you and of course dont give up. I have been dealing with some the same things(depression/intrusive thoughts of suicide/killing others just going completely crazy) for a while now but i have learned to live with it, all i can do really its apart of me.
 
dude SSRIS stop all thoughts and thinking completely if take enough.. Take 40mg of lexapro u will be a zombie

as far as smashing the thoughts and keeping your personality.. sorry bro don't work like that
 
Afaik we aren't allowed to recommend drugs in this forum so can't really answer that. Predictable response would be to say find another solution other than using but that is easier said than done.

Have you tried talking theray and/or SSRIs?
 
Doctors haven't been much help, because I can't articulate what's driving me crazy. Its like little rats are gnawing on my brain, slowly but surely I'm falling apart. I don't even know where to begin.
 
JasperTheReckless said:
Doctors haven't been much help, because I can't articulate what's driving me crazy. Its like little rats are gnawing on my brain, slowly but surely I'm falling apart. I don't even know where to begin.
Click to expand...

I don't think that's uncommon at all. Anyway, I'd encourage to start a therapy, not just medication.
Over time when you talk to your therapist you'll find the burden on your shoulder gets easier and you'll get closer to what depresses you.
It'll most likely take some time and maybe you'll see the need to find a better suiting one one day, but still, it'll help.

I'm not the greatest fan of SSRI/SNRI, but I had to take different one for some time and I can say they'll help.
One time I was very down and I had fantasies of suicide and violence, both against me and others and then I started taking an antidepressant and after some weeks most of them were gone. It works.

Do you live in the States?
 
Only a doctor will be able to prescribe an adequate dose of a safe medication for your suicidality that won't pose much of a risk to your health.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top