I was disappointed to find out that the stuff Erik ordered is probably not gonna work, unless 20-100 grams are taken at once. I’m very green on this damn drug, but apparently, there are all these types and the best bet is to find a site that sells 98% ibogaine as opposed to root bark or root powder, and I forget the last kind. Anyone reading this that has no idea what the fuck I’m talking about, check out this site:
http://www.ibogaine.desk.nl/tours.html
Another good site to check out is:
www.erowid.com
Just type in the name of the drug you wanna know about, it's chemical compound, it's history, what it's used for, and people's personal experiences are there for you.
Interesting to read about if nothing else. Now I know of this site that sells in Canada, but 1. they don’t ship to the US and 2. even if they did, I sure as fuck don’t have six hundred fucking dollars lying around. It’s bullshit that people with no money can’t get help, but whatever. It would take me a long time to save up that kind of money and when I do, I guess I’ll have them send it to Erik in Van. I need to talk to him and find out what the fuck we’re going to do.
My family and my sponsor know about the fact I’m hooked on ultram, even though I’m slowly tapering. As far as they’re concerned I’m clean because ultram isn’t a “real” drug. They’re right in the sense that my life certainly isn’t the unmanageable mess it was while I was practicing real drugs, although I know other NA members would say I’m not really clean. Honestly, what anyone thinks isn’t really an issue with me, the important thing is that I’m doing something about it.
Ibogaine would have detoxed me off this shit a lot faster than doing it by slowly tapering and I’d be done with the w/d’s. As it is now, I’m okay, but I don’t feel particularly good and sociable for about 6 hrs prior to my daily dose. I finally got over this damn cold I’ve had for 10 days (seeming like 10 forevers) but Friday after the meeting, I had to tell Jeff that I felt like crap and sorry, but instead of going out after the meeting every Friday like we always do, I had to bug out.
“Sorry bro, but I’m gonna have to go home and sleep before work.” He looked very disappointed and said, “You haven’t been yourself at all lately.” He’s right. The last I don’t know, 4 months or so I’ve felt not right. My lab results were good, so all this time when I thought my Hep C or diabetes were flaring up, it was a simple case of w/ds all along. I felt like crap for 2 months and got chronic fatigue all the time after cutting my ultram from 10 pills a day to 5, but like I said opiate w/ds usually include insomnia, not hypersomnia! Whatever, I hate to think Erik lost money on the stuff he did get. I hope we can find a way to get the real stuff, but if not I can only do the next best thing, mushrooms. I put in an order of them with Dave. He gave me this big shit eating grin and taunted, “Tanya’s going off the wagon! Tanya’s going off the wagon!” “This isn’t for recreational purposes, it’s for therapy. Ever heard of ibogaine?,” I asked. “No,” he said. “I’ll send you some info about it online, but my friend and I have a problem and we want help.”
Mushrooms always did put me through to higher levels of consciousness. If I can’t get ibogaine, they are the next best thing. I’ve done everything I can, now all I can do is wait. You know it’s frustrating, because as I told my Mom, even in active addiction, I NEVER spent more than $300 at one time for drugs. The times I did spend even that much were rare occasions when I found a kick ass source that only charged $300 for ¼ oz of some quality meth, but that was a rare occurrence.
Usually I spent $70-$140 a week on meth depending on whether I wanted a 1/16th or an 8 ball. The point is that illicit drugs were affordable, but unfortunately ibogaine and even non drug related shit I dug like white water rafting, sky diving, and sports cars were unattainable to me because of the cost. So if some normies wonder why people like me wasted so much money on drugs, it’s because they were the poor people’s thrills in a syringe.
Wanna fly? Wanna raft? Wanna race? There it is affordable, compact, and all ready to go. So, that’s that.
I was going through some journal entries and I saw someone got a stern lecture from spork saying you can't talk shit about people. I assumed she met fellow BL'ers because otherwise if I got in trouble every time someone pissed me off, I wrote about it, and she read about it, hell my ass would have been carved up with a pen knife ages ago, lol.
I saw too someone got edited for either asking for drugs or pushing them, but any time I see edited entries, I have to admit it makes me want to know what the fuck was written, kind of like how D.H. Lawrence's book Lady Chatterly's Lover was banned in the US during the 50's because of it's explicit sexual descriptions of (at the time) unlawful oral copulation considered lewd and lascivious. Next thing you know, people ordered the books like hotcakes from France. Did you know how the Rolling Stones song Lady Jane got its
title? In the book Lady Chatterly's Lover, the game keeper called his mistresses vagina "Lady Jane." He called named his penis Sir Thomas, so of course when I was high on meth 7 years ago, I picked out a yahoo ID called, "Lady_Jane_Loves_Sir_Thomas." People sometimes asked me in, but does Sir Thomas love Lady Jane? Judging from the world's population, I'd say indeed he does. Only one person caught the reference and knew what my scandalous on line name really meant though, an ex English teacher, haha.
http://www.ibogaine.desk.nl/tours.html
Another good site to check out is:
www.erowid.com
Just type in the name of the drug you wanna know about, it's chemical compound, it's history, what it's used for, and people's personal experiences are there for you.
Interesting to read about if nothing else. Now I know of this site that sells in Canada, but 1. they don’t ship to the US and 2. even if they did, I sure as fuck don’t have six hundred fucking dollars lying around. It’s bullshit that people with no money can’t get help, but whatever. It would take me a long time to save up that kind of money and when I do, I guess I’ll have them send it to Erik in Van. I need to talk to him and find out what the fuck we’re going to do.
My family and my sponsor know about the fact I’m hooked on ultram, even though I’m slowly tapering. As far as they’re concerned I’m clean because ultram isn’t a “real” drug. They’re right in the sense that my life certainly isn’t the unmanageable mess it was while I was practicing real drugs, although I know other NA members would say I’m not really clean. Honestly, what anyone thinks isn’t really an issue with me, the important thing is that I’m doing something about it.
Ibogaine would have detoxed me off this shit a lot faster than doing it by slowly tapering and I’d be done with the w/d’s. As it is now, I’m okay, but I don’t feel particularly good and sociable for about 6 hrs prior to my daily dose. I finally got over this damn cold I’ve had for 10 days (seeming like 10 forevers) but Friday after the meeting, I had to tell Jeff that I felt like crap and sorry, but instead of going out after the meeting every Friday like we always do, I had to bug out.
“Sorry bro, but I’m gonna have to go home and sleep before work.” He looked very disappointed and said, “You haven’t been yourself at all lately.” He’s right. The last I don’t know, 4 months or so I’ve felt not right. My lab results were good, so all this time when I thought my Hep C or diabetes were flaring up, it was a simple case of w/ds all along. I felt like crap for 2 months and got chronic fatigue all the time after cutting my ultram from 10 pills a day to 5, but like I said opiate w/ds usually include insomnia, not hypersomnia! Whatever, I hate to think Erik lost money on the stuff he did get. I hope we can find a way to get the real stuff, but if not I can only do the next best thing, mushrooms. I put in an order of them with Dave. He gave me this big shit eating grin and taunted, “Tanya’s going off the wagon! Tanya’s going off the wagon!” “This isn’t for recreational purposes, it’s for therapy. Ever heard of ibogaine?,” I asked. “No,” he said. “I’ll send you some info about it online, but my friend and I have a problem and we want help.”
Mushrooms always did put me through to higher levels of consciousness. If I can’t get ibogaine, they are the next best thing. I’ve done everything I can, now all I can do is wait. You know it’s frustrating, because as I told my Mom, even in active addiction, I NEVER spent more than $300 at one time for drugs. The times I did spend even that much were rare occasions when I found a kick ass source that only charged $300 for ¼ oz of some quality meth, but that was a rare occurrence.
Usually I spent $70-$140 a week on meth depending on whether I wanted a 1/16th or an 8 ball. The point is that illicit drugs were affordable, but unfortunately ibogaine and even non drug related shit I dug like white water rafting, sky diving, and sports cars were unattainable to me because of the cost. So if some normies wonder why people like me wasted so much money on drugs, it’s because they were the poor people’s thrills in a syringe.
Wanna fly? Wanna raft? Wanna race? There it is affordable, compact, and all ready to go. So, that’s that.
I was going through some journal entries and I saw someone got a stern lecture from spork saying you can't talk shit about people. I assumed she met fellow BL'ers because otherwise if I got in trouble every time someone pissed me off, I wrote about it, and she read about it, hell my ass would have been carved up with a pen knife ages ago, lol.
I saw too someone got edited for either asking for drugs or pushing them, but any time I see edited entries, I have to admit it makes me want to know what the fuck was written, kind of like how D.H. Lawrence's book Lady Chatterly's Lover was banned in the US during the 50's because of it's explicit sexual descriptions of (at the time) unlawful oral copulation considered lewd and lascivious. Next thing you know, people ordered the books like hotcakes from France. Did you know how the Rolling Stones song Lady Jane got its
title? In the book Lady Chatterly's Lover, the game keeper called his mistresses vagina "Lady Jane." He called named his penis Sir Thomas, so of course when I was high on meth 7 years ago, I picked out a yahoo ID called, "Lady_Jane_Loves_Sir_Thomas." People sometimes asked me in, but does Sir Thomas love Lady Jane? Judging from the world's population, I'd say indeed he does. Only one person caught the reference and knew what my scandalous on line name really meant though, an ex English teacher, haha.