shishigami
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2011
- Messages
- 890
Around the end of june and not until the end of august >.>
Last night, went out with this girl I met recently for the second time. Spent the evening at a Ska/Punk show then I escorted her back to her apartment, since "I was concerned for her safety, walking and riding the bus through Oakland late at night alone".(I really was concerned actually, but I'd be lying if I said that was the only thing i was thinking about)
She invited me to stay the night, we kissed/made out for a while then did the deed.First time I've been with a girl in 3-4 months, since I was in rehab and working on myself for a bit.
To be honest I felt really awkward at first, because I've been with the same girl for 4.5 years until recently, she moved back to New Jersey after a bunch of crazy bullshit happened and then wanted to give it another shot, so until I decide if I'm moving back to Jersey it's an "open relationship". Felt weird being with a different girl than I'm used to, and even more weird hooking up sober. I had a lot of fun though, kinda like this girl actually. Not looking for a serious relationship(made that clear) but I definitely like her, and would like to hook up with her again.
Except today, she texted me asking if the condom broke last night - I said not that I noticed and if i had i would have said something(truth) - and then I sent a message saying "I had a great time last night, would love to hang out with you again sometime" to which she replied: "Yeah, it was fun."
Not exactly sure how to take that, I guess it just didn't sound too enthusiastic to me, but it was a text after all, so no way to tell tone or body language or anything. I'm just worried because the whole night I was being a bit introverted, really struggling to think of things to talk about. Big problem I've been having since getting sober. Am I just over thinking everything, or would she not have hooked up with me if she really cared about my inability to maintain conversation?
I always over think shit >.< Fuckin being sober - I really struggle to maintain focus and conversation these days... I was honestly really surprised she was receptive to hooking up with me because I thought I blew it by being boring and not talking enough.