i guess i had a flipping mental breakdown last nite. i've tried to kick crank 3 times now, and each time i went back at it.
last nite, after being with people who i thought were my best friends (do not use meth), just turned on me. i dunno.
I've lost so many friends. I feel as if i live in such a fake world, but in reality, i know i'm the problem, not everyone else.
I broke my pipe, dumped an 8-ball of quality crystal, and burned 250$ of 'dirty money'.
As i was driving home, i started laughing hysterically. It was the best high in the world. I felt so released. I'm through, i finally appreciate the value of life, and realize how much my drug abuse was hurting me and everyone around me. Over time i hope i'm a happier person.
My question is, will things ever be back to the way they were before meth? I remember reading someone say something like "have you ever met a ex-hardcore meth addict who is now successful in life?" I have a lot going for me. I'm graduating high school this year, going to UC Riverside next year, gonna study economics. Meth in Riverside is big, its gonna be tough.
I guess i never really knew how must i lost when all i wanted was someone to talk to, a friend, a family member, just ANYONE to turn to. I didn't even have that...
Not one friend i could count on. I can't talk to my parents. Nobody.
Another person on this board wrote "meth = natural selection"
I guess it's true. Those who are not fit enough to NOT smoke meth, will die.
In a way, if i touch the drug again, i HOPE i turn into a lifeless soul. A drug addict who will die on the streets. After all, i would deserve it.
If you're smoking meth, think about this. Addiction isn't always "I MUST HAVE IT." Sometimes, it's as mellow as "i really like it."
Remember, nobody in the world can ever force someone else to quit a drug. No matter how much they try to stop the drug user, they can't, unless THEY want to stop for themselves.
last nite, after being with people who i thought were my best friends (do not use meth), just turned on me. i dunno.
I've lost so many friends. I feel as if i live in such a fake world, but in reality, i know i'm the problem, not everyone else.
I broke my pipe, dumped an 8-ball of quality crystal, and burned 250$ of 'dirty money'.
As i was driving home, i started laughing hysterically. It was the best high in the world. I felt so released. I'm through, i finally appreciate the value of life, and realize how much my drug abuse was hurting me and everyone around me. Over time i hope i'm a happier person.
My question is, will things ever be back to the way they were before meth? I remember reading someone say something like "have you ever met a ex-hardcore meth addict who is now successful in life?" I have a lot going for me. I'm graduating high school this year, going to UC Riverside next year, gonna study economics. Meth in Riverside is big, its gonna be tough.
I guess i never really knew how must i lost when all i wanted was someone to talk to, a friend, a family member, just ANYONE to turn to. I didn't even have that...
Not one friend i could count on. I can't talk to my parents. Nobody.
Another person on this board wrote "meth = natural selection"
I guess it's true. Those who are not fit enough to NOT smoke meth, will die.
In a way, if i touch the drug again, i HOPE i turn into a lifeless soul. A drug addict who will die on the streets. After all, i would deserve it.
If you're smoking meth, think about this. Addiction isn't always "I MUST HAVE IT." Sometimes, it's as mellow as "i really like it."
Remember, nobody in the world can ever force someone else to quit a drug. No matter how much they try to stop the drug user, they can't, unless THEY want to stop for themselves.
