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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

kickd out of rehab AGAIN!

Ds

Ds

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Apr 26, 2006
Messages
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God's Country
hey all, well most of u know i was in rehab since june, all things were goin good till i started fuckin around on that fake weed shit, still havnt touched my DOC, but wouldnt be long till i got the chance,
heres how it went down, they(the nazi staff) searched my room and found all kind of contraband. also 6 packs of that spice shit, i'm still in a shock because it all happened last night, i'm in a rehab deal now, atleast here i can do shit and im not like all out in the fuckin country.

anywho pickd up my slip chip so i'm startin over, keep me in ur thoughts n prayers and i'll do the same,
<3
 
Don't know much about your story but good luck hope things work out at this new place...
 
thanks,
its like i do good for 90days or so then i start isolating more, it's like i relapse before i even do it.
shit sucks.
 
Do you think you intentionally set yourself up for using again, or that you have difficulty not engaging in the behaviors that lead up to it because they have become habitual (i.e. isolating).

In rehabs there is a lot of talk of intentionally setting oneself up to use again, but I get the feeling that in many people these "pre-relapse" behaviors are more due to not having yet developed alternative coping mechanisms rather than intentionally trying to set yourself up for failure.
 
My situation is almost similar to yours been in rehabs the whole year got out got back to shooting h a couple of times and decided it wasnt worth it anymore. I think the awakening comes gradually for most and your time will come just dont beat yourself up the negativity and feeling of failure will be your greatest undoing. Regards.
 
I was in residential care (in the UK) due to depression a few months ago, which had a number of prople in for detox from drink and chems. I was astounded at their attitude towards just smoking tabbaco. You werent allowed to smoke at all on the premises, not even in the secure garden area. If you wanted to smoke you had to be off site, depending on your staus that may well have meant escorted offsite by staff.
It seemed to be causing more conflict than anything else, with people endlessly smuggling in tobbaco and smokin in rooms getting searched etc.
They were trying to deal with it by handing out Nicotine inhalers, which may have been OK for the smokers but I managed to quit some 10 years ago but came out of the place with a habit for inhalers which I only just managed to prevent from ending up with me bag on the weed of babylon !
There wasnt any illegal chems going round but there was an abundance of contraband Benzos which were a bit a a life saver once of twice TBH:|
 
i've been kicked out of 1 out of 5 - 30 day inpatient and 1 outpatient. i learned a little at each treatment, i'll admit, but it's not for everyone. Good Luck.
 
Awww D's, man I'm so sorry to hear this has happened :(
You're going to be just fine though, in this new place. Stay strong man, do not use your DOC, and you may as well steer clear of that spice shit as well man, it's no good.
PM me if/when you want to talk okay?? Much love dude <3
 
Hey D's- it must have been frustrating to get kicked out of your rehab. This would have crushed me in early recovery, as I met many new friends there. You mentioned that you start to lose the program after 90 days- this is understandable, in fact it's amazing that you were able to stay clean for three months with no solution. I was fortunate enough to have a sponsor that got me into action quickly: we did steps 1-3 in five minutes, then I started my fourth step. I sat on my fourth step for about 60 days, slowly working on it, until I heard what I needed to hear to motivate me to finally finish the thing. A week later (70 days clean) I did a fifth step, sat quietly for an hour with no distractions, and went on to steps 6,7, and 8, finishing those in about a day. By the time I finished my fifth step, I had completely lost the urge to use. Life started to make more sense, and from then on I knew what I had to do to be happy and have a successful recovery. If you have worked a fifth step then relapsed in the past, it may be because it is then necessary to go show the program to others. Working with others keeps us clean with all other activities fail. Anyways, good luck! Feel free to PM me for any advice, questions, or just to talk.
 
I have also the same issue. my 18y/o son was in a youth residential treatment program and rehab but got kicked out because he snick out with some other kids. We were able to get him into the adult program because he had just turned 18, he was doing well there for last 3 months but just got kicked out the other day for breaking their rules on no sexual relations with anyone while in the program.
 
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If you don't really want to get clean then its not going to happen. Not to be harsh, but if you have herbal blends in your room then you are not taking the shit seriously.

People that want to get clean follow every rule. Shit, I had to get another person kicked out of my program because he kept breaking the rules. Non disclosure is considered just as serious, so I told on him every time. Fuck him for putting my sobriety on the line.

Whatever it takes. Do not go and use over this.
 
a lot those rehab philosophies are silly, and if your getting clean from opiates theres no reason why you shouldn't be able to smoke a little weed to help get through it, I would never go to one of those places, I quit taking pills, relapsed a few times, then tapered off and stopped, now it looks like I"m gonna have to be on them because of tooth pain, but I never had a huge problem with it anyways, I'm one of those people that have lots of self control when needed.
 
bpayne said:
a lot those rehab philosophies are silly, and if your getting clean from opiates theres no reason why you shouldn't be able to smoke a little weed to help get through it, I would never go to one of those places, I quit taking pills, relapsed a few times, then tapered off and stopped, now it looks like I"m gonna have to be on them because of tooth pain, but I never had a huge problem with it anyways, I'm one of those people that have lots of self control when needed.
Click to expand...

I agree that some of the slogans and sayings are silly, but rules are rules. If one wants to get clean then they will do whatever it takes and that includes following rules.

Weed always led me back to opiates eventually, especially due to the anxiety I called. When people come into rehab they expect to be in a substance free environment. Bringing in drugs is disrespecting other patients simple as that. Addiction causes selfish behavior and makes a person only think about himself. It took me quite some time to realize that I am not the center of the Universe. I am just a small little cog in what makes it run.

So no you should not be allowed to smoke a little bit of weed in rehab. That is not what they are for. I tried to use marijuana for years to get me off of other drugs and alcohol and it just did not work for me. I didn't even like weed at the end but I convinced myself I "needed it for sleep". I tapered myself off of opiates hundreds of times. I always ended up back on them. I did this for 10+ years. I needed "one of those places" to get clean and sober. Most people with long running addiction issues due.

If you've relapsed a few times then you most likely have at least a small problem. I hope you get off and stay off for good. You can have all the self control in the world and it doesn't mean jack shit when it comes to addiction. If all it took was self control then I would have gotten myself clean 5+ years ago.
 
Weed works very well for a lot of people adjusting to life w/o more harmful substances. It allows one to reflect on their situation more effectively and re-adjust their mind during rehab smoothly instead of going through a kind of shock to the system when there are no illicit drugs running through your blood. IMO weed has a very strong theraputic value during rehab. I know that I smoked it with other people in rehab and it helped tremendously -- As opposed to sitting in rehab all depressed and stressed out with the only emotional outlet being offered the indoctrination process that "you are powerless, drugs are bad, these are the health consequences" and on and on...

Enjoy weed. It is not in the same league as other drugs and its purpose is to allow for a smooth transition, upon careful reflection of one's situation, to living a clean and sober lifestyle.
 
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^You (as a general term, you in this being both you and people in general) should be careful recommending weed as a mental health medication. For some it works wonders, but for others, like myself, it is very unhealthy. I support medical marijuana but hesitate to ever recommend it to others when they have addiction issues or mental health issues.
Just had to throw in my 2 cents :)
 
Fresh start D's! :) I wish you the best...all I can say is Be Genuine about your goals.
Bullshiting yourself or anyone else is gonna give you the exact same outcome as before.
Bullshit=Fail Nuff said...Be strong!<3
 
K12 said:
Weed works very well for a lot of people adjusting to life w/o more harmful substances. It allows one to reflect on their situation more effectively and re-adjust their mind during rehab smoothly instead of going through a kind of shock to the system when there are no illicit drugs running through your blood. IMO weed has a very strong theraputic value during rehab. I know that I smoked it with other people in rehab and it helped tremendously -- As opposed to sitting in rehab all depressed and stressed out with the only emotional outlet being offered the indoctrination process that "you are powerless, drugs are bad, these are the health consequences" and on and on...

Enjoy weed. It is not in the same league as other drugs and its purpose is to allow for a smooth transition, upon careful reflection of one's situation, to living a clean and sober lifestyle.
Click to expand...

That is your opinion but the staff at D's facility don't care about your opinion. If you are in rehab and its against the rules then you cannot have it. If you want to get sober you have to follow rules. I am for the legalization of marijuana, hell I may even smoke it in the far future. Who is to say. If I were D I would stop using it for the time being. Getting clean and sober takes sacrifice.

Marijuana can also lead to an escape. I used the stuff for over ten years and was able to use it to escape. That is what drug addicts do, we use to avoid real life issues and problems.
 
D's good luck getting back into rehab/recovery and getting/staying sober. I'll keep you in my thoughts/prayers/meditations.
 
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