Don't have much time, but need to vent somewhere. It really hurts my feelings when so called "friends" I've known 4 a long time and who I've helped out in the past, pretty much turn their backs on me when I need help. Unless, of course there is something in it for them, like rides, money, drugs, or sex. I'm talking about people I've known at least 5-20 yrs. How many times have I given Aimee rides to Timbuktu and back w/o asking for anything in return? If a friend calls me that's in trouble, as long as I won't get harmed helping them and I'm able, I do it. I drove Johnny all over hell and gone the day his car got towed, picked him up and took him 2 what 5 places he needed to go b4 picking up his car at the tow yard? My car takes a $1100 dive I'm in no position to afford, he won't even call me back.
I left him a message saying "Gee thanks so much for your undying loyalty, w/o even so much as a 'Fuck you, TJ.' Golly you sure had no trouble blowing up my phone when you needed help when no one else would, or wanted sex, even when I explained I wasn't interested. Don't bother calling me ever again when you need or want anything." Same with Aimee. All the times I helped her out, wrote her in jail, sent her books, news, drove her son or her mom places because that's what friends do that care about each other for 20 yrs, yet can't and/or won't help her family or friends unless she can get something out of it. Hey whatever. I was very hurt and now pissed off after she called me at work last night after giving me a ride to work coz I have no more car getting pissy and demanding money, even though she owes me money. I love how much fun Aimee and some dope fiend friends in general can be, but goddamn she is selfish even by junkie standards.
I don't and out $ wise since bein owed money, and even the straight friends I've known a long time expect money for rides. Hell even my own family won't help casue it's an inconvenience or don't feel like driving me to work, but have no trouble with, "TJ will go go do this for me, will you pick this up for me, blah blah." My salary and hours have been cut back in part due to no car, but we all got 2 pay cuts where I work, which caused me to fall behind. I'm grateful for my job of 4 yrs, but thanks so much to the people in my life that just kick me when I'm down. I'd expect as much or wouldn't be shocked from most people, especially ones I don't know well, but hoped for just a tad of loyalty from so called close "friends."
Mom was right about one thing, I hate to say. With one exception, NA members are the only ones that don't act that way, even when they don't know you. Guess I should go back, like Mom says, even though I take Rx dope, stopped meth 4 finances/hassles 4 now. I feel like thats being a hypocrit attending, in a way, but fuck it. I'm sorry to say, but they are the only ones that are there for people through thick and thin, even non drinking or using "friends" and family that I've helped out plenty of times before.
I left him a message saying "Gee thanks so much for your undying loyalty, w/o even so much as a 'Fuck you, TJ.' Golly you sure had no trouble blowing up my phone when you needed help when no one else would, or wanted sex, even when I explained I wasn't interested. Don't bother calling me ever again when you need or want anything." Same with Aimee. All the times I helped her out, wrote her in jail, sent her books, news, drove her son or her mom places because that's what friends do that care about each other for 20 yrs, yet can't and/or won't help her family or friends unless she can get something out of it. Hey whatever. I was very hurt and now pissed off after she called me at work last night after giving me a ride to work coz I have no more car getting pissy and demanding money, even though she owes me money. I love how much fun Aimee and some dope fiend friends in general can be, but goddamn she is selfish even by junkie standards.
I don't and out $ wise since bein owed money, and even the straight friends I've known a long time expect money for rides. Hell even my own family won't help casue it's an inconvenience or don't feel like driving me to work, but have no trouble with, "TJ will go go do this for me, will you pick this up for me, blah blah." My salary and hours have been cut back in part due to no car, but we all got 2 pay cuts where I work, which caused me to fall behind. I'm grateful for my job of 4 yrs, but thanks so much to the people in my life that just kick me when I'm down. I'd expect as much or wouldn't be shocked from most people, especially ones I don't know well, but hoped for just a tad of loyalty from so called close "friends."
Mom was right about one thing, I hate to say. With one exception, NA members are the only ones that don't act that way, even when they don't know you. Guess I should go back, like Mom says, even though I take Rx dope, stopped meth 4 finances/hassles 4 now. I feel like thats being a hypocrit attending, in a way, but fuck it. I'm sorry to say, but they are the only ones that are there for people through thick and thin, even non drinking or using "friends" and family that I've helped out plenty of times before.