Jimmy the Gun
Bluelighter
alcohol, adderall, meth, ketamine, mj, oxazapam - fairly experienced - just chillin
The day started out at a friends appartment where we were to meet some other people to bbq with. When I got there at about 3:00 pm I snorted 10 mg of adderall and played records for a bit. I then went down stairs and got to know some of the people who we would be chilling with for the rest of the night. Eventually we motivated, and went to the store, then too the park for the bbq. I snorted anoth 10 mg right before we left as well. This left me feeling nicely wired, but nothing too special.
At the park, I met some other people, ate some food, and imbibed mabey 5 ounces of wiskey. This got me fairly drunk, but didn't seem to contribute or detract from my ability to socialize. We had a typical bbq, and posted untill the park closed. Everyone then went their own way; the people I came with decided to go back to a friends house and sit around etc. over there.
When we arrived, I snorted another 10 mg of adderall, then hit a meth pipe for the first time (I had tried it off of tinfoil in the past). This was about 10:00pm. I think I got better hits off of the pipe, and the rush was much more intense than with my previous experience. I felt my whole body tingling, and a general sense of mellow energy. After the tweak session ended, we went into another room to listen to music. Unbeknownst to me, there was a plate full of ketamine in the refrigerator, and its owner was generous enough to give me a taste. She cut me a farily big line, which I got to snort off of a really cool girls stomach (the plate was on top of her stomach though). This is when things get a bit weird for me, and I subsequently stopped saying much for the rest of the night.
Every time I do K, I kind of forget how powerfull it is untill my world starts spinning, and my body goes completely numb. For the next 15 minutes I felt my mind begin to dissasosiate from my body. The feeling that this gives me is identicle to when I was a little kid laying in my bed at night. Every once in a while I would be laying there and my body would feel incredibly numb and swollen, even though it physically wasn't. K gives me the exact same feeling. The girl who let me put the plate on her stomach started rubbing my back, and I rubbed her's. She was on MDMA and we basically sat there holding hands as our respective drugs took hold. People were remarking how PLURific it all was. I could really feel some sort of connection to her; it felt like energy was flowing through our hands, and I had the distinct feeling that I had met her somewhere before (in a dream perhaps?).
At this point, my normal vision was very distorted. The world was spinning as if I was really drunk, and objects were shifting in size and contrast. I found that if I unfocused my eyes, and let my brain go, I could drift in and out of focused attention. When I focused on the world, I could see my surroundings and listen to all of the noise around me. I would then unfocus my eyes and a thought would become my perception. I don't think my vocabulary is good enough to express what I saw, but it was along the lines of acknowledging that everything is innately connected, both spiritually, and through science. However, in reality these two different paths are probably just alternate manifestations of the same ever flowing force. These are things that I have thought and written about before, but it was really cool to live and see the connections, rather than have them exist as mear abstractions in my normal awareness. Eventually my mind calmed down a bit, and I was able to participate in our shared world. I could still feel a strong presence of the meth in my system, but instead of feeling euphoric, I felt jittery and sick to my stomach.
One friend suggested that more meth was a good way to fix that, but I thought water and a cliff bar sounded like a better idea. I enjoyed my sustinance with some friends watching the movie "The Sulton Sea". It is about the world of big time meth dealers, a place where I never ever want to be in my life. About half way through the movie we smoked a bowl of ganga. This, in combination with my cliff bar and water basically eliminated my nausea. Stonning out to the rest of the movie was a nice bit of mental relaxation. At the end of the movie I railed another 10 mg adderall. I think I drank a beer during the movie as well. At this point, about 12:00 am, I'm sitting around pondering the world and am invited to smoke more meth.
I was better at hitting the pipe this time and had a very intense rush about 2 minutes after my first hit. Again my whole body was buzzing, but I was still stuck in my non-talkative zone. At this point I should note that some drugs tend to give me a bit of paranoia which I just deal with. My paranoia is almost always focused on me hearing/thinking I am hearing people talking about me. One can never be sure if they are really doing it though, so I like to think friends wouldn't be talkin smack. Subsequently, I usually ignore everything I think I hear. The reason I bring this up is because I have decided that I am probably about "5%" gay. While the thought of even kissing a guy makes me feel weird and uneasy, I'm not afraid to admit that I can tell the difference between an ugly brodie and a handsome movie star. I guess only time will tell if this is some sort of Fraudian defense mechanism, or if Kinsey was right and homosexuality truely does work on a spectrum that is far from being black and white. To continue with my hallucinations (or were they?) of others making comments about me, I have kind of a high voice, and think my mannerisms can come off as a bit gay sometimes (personally I think the ladies like my speach pattern and mannerisms). So anywhoodle
, I have rejected all of the guys that have hit on me so far and don't see my self accepting anytime soon. While I don't care if someone is gay (I have had a few gay/bi friends who I'm completely chill with, and don't make me uncomfortable at all), I don't like people to think I swing that way. Mabey it is threatening to my Wooley Mamouth hunting instincts or something. So yeah, my paranoia of people talking about me centered around them pointing out my strange facial expressions, silly goose mannerisms etc. I know something dumb like this shouldn't bother me, but to some extent it does. So yeah, on with the trip!
After we smoked more meth, we went out side while people got their evil nicotine fixes. We also smoked another bud bowl out there as well. This made me more introverted, but one of our friends talks enough for the whole group , so I wasn't too concerned. I would listen to what was being said and think of responses; however, it seemed like what I wanted to say would be little more than added noise, thus not worth the effort involved in speaking the syllables required.
I was now starting to feel almost socially akward just kind of following the group from room to room. Simply following others around in a non-responsive state is strange for me because I have always considered my self more of a leader type. Usually, I am the one doing what I want regardless of what everyone else is doing. Even though I just wanted to chill with everyone else, I felt weird following a small group from room to room. For the sake of interacting, I would listen to conversations and out of habit laugh when other people laughed, even though I could barely hear what anyone was saying.
I guess it was about 1:00 now and we all settled down to watch another movie (Human Traffic). I bartered for two more bumps of K, and had a simmilar experience as earlier in the night. In both experiences, I found that looking at my shoes (which seemed very "real" to me at the time) anchored me back to reality after one of my thought tangents had ended. I drank another beer after I stopped dissasociating, then sniffed an adderall and smoked a bowl of bud once the movie ended. By this time, my thought process seemed to be greatly diminished. That ususal banter that goes on in my head was completely silent except for concise thoughts of immediate relavance. Along with the silent mind, I was generally disorganized and confused. While I could think of sentences, speaking them was a task. Plus everything I had to say was a stupid personal anecdote, or something about war in Iraq, electrons, or some other complicated subject that I was definately not up to talking about. Luckily I could simply rely on our talkative friend to ward off any uncomfortable extended silences. Also, I would do things like stand up to go somewhere, then change my mind or forget what I was doing and waste a minute walking in circles on the carpet.
It was probably about 4:00 am when we smoked more meth, this time I sniffed a small line too, as well as another adderall. Once we finished smoking, I believe we watched the end of the movie "Fame". This was entertaining in a strange way. I had never seen it before and had no idea that it was so graphic. The big cheesy musical ending had me cracking up. After this, I think I went and played video games and cards with everyone, but we probably smoked more weed first. My exact recal for details is a bit hazy.
Once we had enough of cards and video games, the meth pipe called our names once again; it was around 7 in the morning at this point. Once again I caught that now familiar speed buzz. This cleared my head a bit and it was much easier to say what was on my mind; even though there wasn't much going on in there at this point. Consequently I stayed fairly quiet. We then smoked a bowl of the green and everyone slowly made their way out of the house and to their respective homes. One interesting note is the girl with whom I felt such a natural connection with seemed kind of kurt and angry when I said goodby to her. It was 8:00 am, and I'm sure she was probably just tired, but it still bothered me for a while. I don't know what I could have done to piss her off (if I had in fact done so)?
When I made it back to my room at about 9 something I took an oxazapam(a tranquilizer) and waited 30 minutes. I felt little to nothing so I drank a beer. Still nothing so I swallowed another, waited 15 minutes, and drank another beer. After laying in my bed for two or three hours it was very apparent that sleep wasn't going to happen. So I did some homework and am now typing up this report. Besides my dumb paranoia that was annoying at best, I had a great time and met some really tight people. If I had to do it over again, I would consider less adderall, but probably not.
I hope you liked my report and would be interested if anyone else has had simmilar non-k hole revelations and visions.
peace
[ 30 September 2002: Message edited by: Jimmy the Gun ]
The day started out at a friends appartment where we were to meet some other people to bbq with. When I got there at about 3:00 pm I snorted 10 mg of adderall and played records for a bit. I then went down stairs and got to know some of the people who we would be chilling with for the rest of the night. Eventually we motivated, and went to the store, then too the park for the bbq. I snorted anoth 10 mg right before we left as well. This left me feeling nicely wired, but nothing too special.
At the park, I met some other people, ate some food, and imbibed mabey 5 ounces of wiskey. This got me fairly drunk, but didn't seem to contribute or detract from my ability to socialize. We had a typical bbq, and posted untill the park closed. Everyone then went their own way; the people I came with decided to go back to a friends house and sit around etc. over there.
When we arrived, I snorted another 10 mg of adderall, then hit a meth pipe for the first time (I had tried it off of tinfoil in the past). This was about 10:00pm. I think I got better hits off of the pipe, and the rush was much more intense than with my previous experience. I felt my whole body tingling, and a general sense of mellow energy. After the tweak session ended, we went into another room to listen to music. Unbeknownst to me, there was a plate full of ketamine in the refrigerator, and its owner was generous enough to give me a taste. She cut me a farily big line, which I got to snort off of a really cool girls stomach (the plate was on top of her stomach though). This is when things get a bit weird for me, and I subsequently stopped saying much for the rest of the night.
Every time I do K, I kind of forget how powerfull it is untill my world starts spinning, and my body goes completely numb. For the next 15 minutes I felt my mind begin to dissasosiate from my body. The feeling that this gives me is identicle to when I was a little kid laying in my bed at night. Every once in a while I would be laying there and my body would feel incredibly numb and swollen, even though it physically wasn't. K gives me the exact same feeling. The girl who let me put the plate on her stomach started rubbing my back, and I rubbed her's. She was on MDMA and we basically sat there holding hands as our respective drugs took hold. People were remarking how PLURific it all was. I could really feel some sort of connection to her; it felt like energy was flowing through our hands, and I had the distinct feeling that I had met her somewhere before (in a dream perhaps?).
At this point, my normal vision was very distorted. The world was spinning as if I was really drunk, and objects were shifting in size and contrast. I found that if I unfocused my eyes, and let my brain go, I could drift in and out of focused attention. When I focused on the world, I could see my surroundings and listen to all of the noise around me. I would then unfocus my eyes and a thought would become my perception. I don't think my vocabulary is good enough to express what I saw, but it was along the lines of acknowledging that everything is innately connected, both spiritually, and through science. However, in reality these two different paths are probably just alternate manifestations of the same ever flowing force. These are things that I have thought and written about before, but it was really cool to live and see the connections, rather than have them exist as mear abstractions in my normal awareness. Eventually my mind calmed down a bit, and I was able to participate in our shared world. I could still feel a strong presence of the meth in my system, but instead of feeling euphoric, I felt jittery and sick to my stomach.
One friend suggested that more meth was a good way to fix that, but I thought water and a cliff bar sounded like a better idea. I enjoyed my sustinance with some friends watching the movie "The Sulton Sea". It is about the world of big time meth dealers, a place where I never ever want to be in my life. About half way through the movie we smoked a bowl of ganga. This, in combination with my cliff bar and water basically eliminated my nausea. Stonning out to the rest of the movie was a nice bit of mental relaxation. At the end of the movie I railed another 10 mg adderall. I think I drank a beer during the movie as well. At this point, about 12:00 am, I'm sitting around pondering the world and am invited to smoke more meth.
I was better at hitting the pipe this time and had a very intense rush about 2 minutes after my first hit. Again my whole body was buzzing, but I was still stuck in my non-talkative zone. At this point I should note that some drugs tend to give me a bit of paranoia which I just deal with. My paranoia is almost always focused on me hearing/thinking I am hearing people talking about me. One can never be sure if they are really doing it though, so I like to think friends wouldn't be talkin smack. Subsequently, I usually ignore everything I think I hear. The reason I bring this up is because I have decided that I am probably about "5%" gay. While the thought of even kissing a guy makes me feel weird and uneasy, I'm not afraid to admit that I can tell the difference between an ugly brodie and a handsome movie star. I guess only time will tell if this is some sort of Fraudian defense mechanism, or if Kinsey was right and homosexuality truely does work on a spectrum that is far from being black and white. To continue with my hallucinations (or were they?) of others making comments about me, I have kind of a high voice, and think my mannerisms can come off as a bit gay sometimes (personally I think the ladies like my speach pattern and mannerisms). So anywhoodle
, I have rejected all of the guys that have hit on me so far and don't see my self accepting anytime soon. While I don't care if someone is gay (I have had a few gay/bi friends who I'm completely chill with, and don't make me uncomfortable at all), I don't like people to think I swing that way. Mabey it is threatening to my Wooley Mamouth hunting instincts or something. So yeah, my paranoia of people talking about me centered around them pointing out my strange facial expressions, silly goose mannerisms etc. I know something dumb like this shouldn't bother me, but to some extent it does. So yeah, on with the trip!After we smoked more meth, we went out side while people got their evil nicotine fixes. We also smoked another bud bowl out there as well. This made me more introverted, but one of our friends talks enough for the whole group
, so I wasn't too concerned. I would listen to what was being said and think of responses; however, it seemed like what I wanted to say would be little more than added noise, thus not worth the effort involved in speaking the syllables required.I was now starting to feel almost socially akward just kind of following the group from room to room. Simply following others around in a non-responsive state is strange for me because I have always considered my self more of a leader type. Usually, I am the one doing what I want regardless of what everyone else is doing. Even though I just wanted to chill with everyone else, I felt weird following a small group from room to room. For the sake of interacting, I would listen to conversations and out of habit laugh when other people laughed, even though I could barely hear what anyone was saying.
I guess it was about 1:00 now and we all settled down to watch another movie (Human Traffic). I bartered for two more bumps of K, and had a simmilar experience as earlier in the night. In both experiences, I found that looking at my shoes (which seemed very "real" to me at the time) anchored me back to reality after one of my thought tangents had ended. I drank another beer after I stopped dissasociating, then sniffed an adderall and smoked a bowl of bud once the movie ended. By this time, my thought process seemed to be greatly diminished. That ususal banter that goes on in my head was completely silent except for concise thoughts of immediate relavance. Along with the silent mind, I was generally disorganized and confused. While I could think of sentences, speaking them was a task. Plus everything I had to say was a stupid personal anecdote, or something about war in Iraq, electrons, or some other complicated subject that I was definately not up to talking about. Luckily I could simply rely on our talkative friend to ward off any uncomfortable extended silences. Also, I would do things like stand up to go somewhere, then change my mind or forget what I was doing and waste a minute walking in circles on the carpet.
It was probably about 4:00 am when we smoked more meth, this time I sniffed a small line too, as well as another adderall. Once we finished smoking, I believe we watched the end of the movie "Fame". This was entertaining in a strange way. I had never seen it before and had no idea that it was so graphic. The big cheesy musical ending had me cracking up. After this, I think I went and played video games and cards with everyone, but we probably smoked more weed first. My exact recal for details is a bit hazy.
Once we had enough of cards and video games, the meth pipe called our names once again; it was around 7 in the morning at this point. Once again I caught that now familiar speed buzz. This cleared my head a bit and it was much easier to say what was on my mind; even though there wasn't much going on in there at this point. Consequently I stayed fairly quiet. We then smoked a bowl of the green and everyone slowly made their way out of the house and to their respective homes. One interesting note is the girl with whom I felt such a natural connection with seemed kind of kurt and angry when I said goodby to her. It was 8:00 am, and I'm sure she was probably just tired, but it still bothered me for a while. I don't know what I could have done to piss her off (if I had in fact done so)?
When I made it back to my room at about 9 something I took an oxazapam(a tranquilizer) and waited 30 minutes. I felt little to nothing so I drank a beer. Still nothing so I swallowed another, waited 15 minutes, and drank another beer. After laying in my bed for two or three hours it was very apparent that sleep wasn't going to happen. So I did some homework and am now typing up this report. Besides my dumb paranoia that was annoying at best, I had a great time and met some really tight people. If I had to do it over again, I would consider less adderall, but probably not.
I hope you liked my report and would be interested if anyone else has had simmilar non-k hole revelations and visions.
peace
[ 30 September 2002: Message edited by: Jimmy the Gun ]
In my limmited experience, I would say smoking a couple hits of meth has a better "rush" too it than railing 10 mgs of adderall. The rush I'm talking about is the euphoric tingling sensation throughout the body. I would call adderall euphoric, but without the rush. I haven't done more than 10 mg adderal at once though. Mabey someone with more meth experience could answer your question about sniffing vs smoking vs eating. Late!
